On the road again graduates

[RedWylder]

Susie I'm so sorry but I know you must have a mixture of feelings at the moment. Devastated yet glad that you know the outcome and you can start moving forward again. This group actually started in the TTC after Loss forum and we have a wonderful support there that you might be interested in. All of us same ladies post in both but we try to keep our preggo comments out of the TTC one so that feelings aren't hurt. Here is the link:

https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/t...lace-women-getting-into-ttc-groove-again.html

 

[Left wonderin]

Susie firstly , life sometimes is so unfair . I'm sure you are asking why me . I hope you have lots of support around you and some real life people who understand how hard this is for you right now . I hope you ar being well minded by those around you . Take care and give yourself as much time as you need to grieve . We are all here to support you xxxxxxx

 

[SusieC]

Thank you ladies you are all so kind
Starry - I will see you there. When you start the TTC journey never in a million years do you think that's where you're headed. I see you've had 4 losses - so sorry for you. What has helped you to cope?
I'm lucky to have a caring OH, family and friends. In RL I only have 1 friend who belongs to the recurrent MC club and after 5 losses she is about to have her first So I wouldn't dream of burdening her at this happy time for her. I have 2 other close friends who both had 1 loss before having babies, I will be able to talk to them as they have been kind before xx

 

[skyesmom]

Susie C i am so sorry for your loss and for such hard news. i am sending you my love and i hope you get your rainbow soon... give a big loving hug to yourself, and take your time to heal.. it sounds like you got a good back up system of friends and family in real life and that is so so important.
if i were you, i'd contact your friend that is now having her rainbow after 5 losses. i am sure she has felt as alone as you feel now, and wanted to reach out for someone but she couldn't.
when a friend of mine suffered a loss and reached out for me (i didn't know she was pregnant even though i had a feeling she may be), and i helped her through, it was healing also for me. in my circle of friends, i was the only one to suffer losses until a year ago when it happened to my friend, and it was a huge relief having someone to talk to and also being able to help. it was as if taking away her loneliness healed my own too.

and even though she is now having her rainbow, the truth is you never forget your angels and it is always beautiful when you have someone you can share your feelings with and who can understand you. so i think instead of burdening her, it could also be helpful to her.

hugs to you and to your OH and to all your beautiful angels

 

[Starry Night]

Susie - it can be tough to cope. I have a friend who has had multiple losses and most of them came after her last child was born so she had to give up the dream of adding to her family. She's older than me (her youngest is in highschool) but she can still relate and she's been the one person who has truly understood and had the patience to listen to my ramblings. Having a loving, caring DH has helped too. Also, dh and I recently went on a mini-vacation just to "get away". It really, really helped remove some of the anxiety and reignite the passion between us.

If you want to talk more or hear more about my story please join us in the TTC thread Red linked. This is a pregnant thread and I am trying to keep my contributions positive.

 

[Topanga053]

If you want to talk more or hear more about my story please join us in the TTC thread Red linked. This is a pregnant thread and I am trying to keep my contributions positive.

Aww don't worry about that, Starry. We've all been there too (some of us multiple times). I can't speak for the others, but it doesn't bother me in the least to hear about others' losses in more detail on this thread. I'm sure it would be different in a "regular" pregnancy thread, but I don't think it's disturbing in a PAL thread because we've all been there. No innocence to destroy here!

 

[Left wonderin]

Topanga I agree totally , we lost our virginity in this area So Starry and anyone else here please feel free to share the ups and downs of the journey your on right now , we have all been thee not so long ago , no need for brave faces here

 

[SusieC]

I have to say I am feeling a bit emotional at your kindness and caring. I am touched to receive so much thought from people I have never met. You are all truly beautiful people, who's rainbows will be blessed with so much joy & love xx

 

[Starry Night]

Left - you're too funny! "virginity" indeed. LOL

I plan on testing on Wednesday and am feeling quite nervous! It's still quite the wait so I have to distract myself until then.

 

[Topanga053]

Left- HAHAHA I agree with Starry, virginity indeed! I laughed so hard at your comment.

Susie- aww honestly, that brought a tear to my eye. That was so sweet of you to say. Your rainbow will be just as lucky when she arrives.

Starry- everything about this process involves waiting!! It's so frustrating!! FX'd you can distract yourself until Wednesday!!

 

[skyesmom]

Left- HAHAHA I agree with Starry, virginity indeed! I laughed so hard at your comment.

Susie- aww honestly, that brought a tear to my eye. That was so sweet of you to say. Your rainbow will be just as lucky when she arrives.

Starry- everything about this process involves waiting!! It's so frustrating!! FX'd you can distract yourself until Wednesday!!

I'm totally with Topanga on all three of these! actually it's hard to add something more to it except that Red you made me laugh my butt off haha yes we're no virgins here!

and Susie yes, your rainbow will have an amazing mom and dad too, just like your angels already do


ohhh and Starry let's see, you could try with knitting, cleaning your hard drive from old useless files (dangerous business though because it's like going through old boxes), writing a weird journal of all the possible let'smakethetimepassbyrealquick remedies you could think of, buy a box of colorful cake decoration flakes and then separate them by shape and color using only a toothpick (something you could do with your LO), hide all your OH's underwear and then design a treasure hunt around the house for him when he comes back from work.. and so on and so on....

(ok i haven't slept in a looong while and have been working a bit too much so i got a bunch of crazy ideas coming into my head)

to you all ladies!

 

[Topanga053]

HAHAHAHA ohhhh Skyesmom, now I kinda want to ask DH to separate a box of cake decoration flakes with me by color and shape, just to see the look on his face. I'm sure it would be priceless!

 

[Starry Night]

I think my DH would have me committed if he caught me doing that! I don't have the patience for tedious tasks so he'd wonder what I was up to!! ha ha! And DS would either just eat the flakes (highly likely) or fling them all over the floor (most definitely HIGHLY likely). And of course, the cat would have to get involved too. She can't keep her nose out of anything. hee hee

Ladies, I'm starting to feel nauseated and I couldn't be more excited even with my barfing phobia. Yesterday, I gagged a few times and this morning I woke up and felt awful. No fever or other signs of illness. I'm crossing my fingers so tight they could snap!

 

[RedWylder]

I found baby's heartbeat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was only for a second but it was undeniably the baby's and not my own. Gosh I'm so happy right now.

 

[Left wonderin]

Red that is great news and I'm sure a sweet sound
i won't get a Doppler as I know I would become obsessed !!!! Can't wait till I'm feeling regular kicks for reassurance.

Tonight I am so tired , but good tired, went for a hike today for 3 hours in the country side , only I would start hiking at almost 5 months pregnant !!! Lol .....was amazing views though , well worth it and the dogs are wreaked !! Sitting here now feeling "pops" in my belly trying to figure out if its wind or baby having a wiggle !!!!

 

[RedWylder]

Left...it's definitely baby! (because wind isn't very exciting). I don't know if I'd purchase a doppler but since I have one at work, I don't see any harm in it. Plus it just made my day. This baby might actually be my rainbow!!

 

[anchor08]

You ladies are all so funny! I know it's all ups and downs, but I'm amazed by how positive you all can be sometimes in the worst circumstances. Susie, I am SO sorry again about this loss...please stay with us if you want and let us know how it's going, we are all with you.

Red, I'm a few pages late in responding but thank you so much for your encouragement! Sometimes I stay quiet because I feel guilty about being so far a long, past most of the scary part -- though I have to say, even now there are a lot of threads on here about counting movements and making sure nothing changes...I guess the worrying is for life! But I'm doing well, and I can't believe I'll be meeting our little girl in a matter of weeks. So unreal. I will definitely post a bump picture -- my bump has taken a long time to show, so it's pretty cute right now!

 

[Left wonderin]

Anchor !!! Please don't hide for us !!! We need to hear what's its like further into this journey !!! You should celabrate being 31 weeks and let us all join in the party I think there are NO parts of this journey that aren't scary ! And it even get worse when baby arrives !!! Lol.

 

[Topanga053]

I found baby's heartbeat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was only for a second but it was undeniably the baby's and not my own. Gosh I'm so happy right now.

Yay Red!!!!

DH and I just used the Doppler. DH thinks it was just my HB, but I'm convinced we found baby... my HB isn't that fast!!!

 

[SusieC]

Red - that is fab news!
Skye's mom- you're so sweet
Anchor- don't feel guilty , you're our poster girl!
Starry - fingers x for you ++++++
Xxx

BTW- AFM- I'm doing ok, it's sad, crap and up and down but I know we'll get through this and have our rainbow. Plus I bought a sewing machine and have started some projects! (I'm so old before my time,lol!)