Only in my dreams... Anyone else?

[Noele0002]

Hi! So I have been TTC for over 20 months now and I am just feeling down today... Over the last year I have been having all kinds of dreams about BFP's, babies, and pregnancy... It seriously hurts to wake up from one of those dreams and realize it wasn't real!

Obviously I cannot control my dreams and emotions. I can't help thinking about babies and my infertility. I am struggling and trying to figure out how to deal with everything! Normally I am an extremely optimistic person but with in the last couple weeks I got the official diagnosis of 'unexplained infertility' and I am just trying to figure out how to deal with it. These baby dreams don't help the coping process.

I am wondering do any of you get the baby dreams? How do you deal with it? Does it upset you?

2 weeks ago when I was in my TWW during my first cycle of Clomid I had a dream that I got a BFP and told DH and we both cried with excitement but then shortly after I woke up and it really broke my heart... Last night I had a dream I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and this little baby looked up at me and said 'I love you!' (Obviously a dream because what infant can talk?) But it was again kind of painful to wake up to reality today and find the strength to keep going. I guess I just feel like infertility completely robbed me of my happiness!!

Thanks for listening to me vent. Just having one of 'those' days and I'm sure I will be in a more positive mood tomorrow.

 

[gemba85]

Hi,

Hope you feeling a bit better this aftenoon..

I know how you feel, i've been trying for just over a year so not as long as you yet.. but every month its such a disappointment.. and to make it worst after 9 months of trying my best friend who had just come off the pill got pregnant within 2 weeks!!

Dont get me wrong I am over the moon for her but also insanely jealous!

Have you tried Soy?? It's meant to be the 'natural clomid' I've had irregular cycles since coming off BC so it's been 11 months but only 9 cycles.

I've read so many things about it on here and have decided to give it a try this month. I'm on CD6 now so fingers crossed it works..

 

[CaliDreaming]

Those pregnancy dreams are the worst! Thankfully I've only had three pregnancy dreams since I've been TTC this time around. Two of those dreams were weird so those weren't as hard to deal with, but I had one where I dreamt I was going to the hospital to visit a friend about to give birth. I left the hospital, only to realize I was 6-7 months pregnant without even knowing it and then I went right back to the hospital. I felt so relieved in the dream and then had to wake up to the cold hard fact that I had had nothing to show for almost a year of trying.

It's always so tough when you wake up and realize it was just a dream. Sometimes I try to hope that the dreams are premonitions and designed to give me hope if I just keep trying.

 

[Noele0002]

Thanks Gemba85 & CaliDreaming for the response! I feel a little better now... I really tried to hang on to that dream this morning... I kept closing my eyes wishing I could fall back asleep into that dream!

Gemba85- I have not tried SOY but I will look into and seek my doctors opinion. Also, its SOOOO hard dealing with a best friends pregnancy! So far since I have been TTC I've had at least one friend who is pregnant this whole time... It seems like all of my closer girlfriends are taking turns being pregnant! I am truely happy for all of them just sad its never my turn.

CaliDreaming- That's a great way to think of those dreams as premonitions designed to give us hope. Thanks I did not look at it that way.

Again thank you ladies! I don't really have anyone to talk to so I look for comfort from others going through similar things as me.

 

[Molae06]

What a coincidence to wake up and see this posting first thing. Last night I had the best (worst) dream. Me and dh were in the bathroom and I did a pregnancy test and immediately both lines came up BFP!! We were so happy, then the dream went on to us telling my parents, and then it went on to me going shopping with my mom picking out baby things....it felt so real, then to wake up was so painful. I have had so many pregnancy/baby dreams over the years. I do get sad for a little while after waking up from the dreams, but it doesn't upset me as much as other things, like so many people becoming pregnant around me etc.

 

[ces2008]

I have those dreams all the time too. Like you, I've been TTC just over 20 months and have the wonderful diagnosis of "unexplained female infertility." Ugh. I suffer from depression too, so I sometimes get the dreams of getting a BFP, then miscarrying and attempting suicide. Really doesn't help. I am on my 3rd cycle on Clomid. I hope you get your BFP soon and your dreams come true!

 

[Noele0002]

Thanks girls!!! I'm glad to see I'm not the only one having these dreams.

ces208- I couldn't even imagine having dreams like that That would be hard.

I wish you all luck getting your BFPs! No matter how down I get sometimes I will always be hopeful. Good luck and babydust ladies! Thanks so much.