Other people holding your baby.

[sunnylove]

Was it easy for you to let other people hold your preemie, either in the NICU or once baby was home? In our NICU, only a select 4 people with support badges can hold the baby once he's in a crib. Baby is not in a crib yet. We have not given support badges out yet because my DH has a step-parent so there are 5 grandparents, not 4. But mostly because I do not like the idea of people (especially his mother) going into the NICU anytime they want without asking/telling us. Anyway, once baby gets moved to a crib, I cannot decide if we want people to be able to hold him at all in the NICU. I'm afraid of germs and infection. I don't like the idea of someone breathing on him so closely.

I know the grandparents would probably feel jipped by this, but I'm not comfortable with it while he's still in NICU. We have a lot of family and they all have noted how they can't wait to hold him. Even people we don't know (parents' friends). But even when he comes home, I don't want a lot of people holding him.

Was it easy or hard for you to let people hold your preemie?

 

[kit10grl]

We were in several NICU depts. in two different hospitals. They always had the rule of two visitors one of which must be a patient. So even if grandparents were visiting one of us had to go along with them. Even if its not a rule in your hospital maybe you could tell them it is?

No one held our baby in nicu except me. DH was too scared too. Also if baby is havng a hard day they may limit time or occasions of being held, so I would be wary of letting others holding in case they said oh hes been out already today (with MIL) so we thnk he needs to rest and then the mother doesn't get to hold him that day iyswim?


Germs wise it will probably be fine because they will be subject to the same rules you and your partner are so its unlikelky they are at more risk to bring any germs in than you yourself are. But if your not comfortable with it it is entirely your right to refuse.

As far as having baby held by others once home, I wish we had the problem of other people trying to hold her. We practically have to force my family to hold her as they are still afraid of hurting her. Most people will say they want to but then they just don't. With DS he used to be practically wrestled out my arms before his coat was off if we went anywhere now I almost have to drop DD in their laps and walk away. Being held is part of normal development and we just want her to be treated normally. but also being worried about people holding your newborn is totally normal as a new mother premie or not so again if your ncomfrotable just say no.

 

[jadey_fae]

sunnylove, I was the same with my daughter when she was in nicu. No one else held her except for me. I had, had to wait a week to hold her myself and I didn't want to share her at this point with relatives etc as I had only held her once when people started to visit. I was also afraid of germs etc. If u are not comfortable with other people holding him yet then go with that.

 

[Nela]

I'd either wait until baby is out of NICU or, if i were comfy enough with the person going to do the holding, I would make sure to be present at all times when someone else is there. I would not allow anyone to hold baby without me there.

 

[Hope115]

Can i give u some perspective from a NICU nurse ? Its not the same as mommy advise but maybe it would help. There are times where im running around and i just dont get to love on my lil patients as much as i would like if they were home they would be getting much more one on one holding time.... If the parents arent there at the time and the nurse is unable to at the moment.... The next best thing is for baby to get some loving by their grandparents just a thought- but utimately you need to do what u feel most comfotable with