Other people's reactions to your pregnancy

[lightweight]

Most people I've told have been really pleased, especially those that know about one or both of my two previous miscarriages.

I told my team at work today and one of them, who has been unable to conceive for a year, seems very upset by it, which of course is understandable, but I've been trying for a similar amount of time to her and have had my fair share of issues of course.

I now feel a bit awkward and wonder if I should have taken her to one side before, but having said that she's been a bit tactless in the past saying things like she wants one now and doesn't want to be any older (she's 10 years younger than me) so doesn't want to have to wait.

I don't want to feel awkward myself, and I don't want to upset her any more, but equally I can't keep avoiding her!

 

[mislaww]

Ugh. As much as I can appreciate how hard it is for someone having difficulty TTC to hear about someone else's success, I don't have too much sympathy for her given her insensitive comments to you.

There's nothing you can do about how you shared the news or how she took the news. Just be sensitive in how much pregnancy talk you do around her, I guess.

 

[hb1]

I agree - you can't not be happy about your pg but if you don't talk about it with her then you can't be accused of not being sensitive.

It's not like you don't understand her pain - I feel that these success stories where the pregnancy has been hard fought for are a lift for the soul when you're going through these problems yourself rather than a reason for her to feel badly towards you.

hx

 

[Peril]

I have only just started announcing mine now. I have a friend who mc a couple if weeks before I had my termination, I made sure I told her first before anyone else did, but did it with a couple of others there too. She thankfully took it really well, but I was worried about a possible negative reaction. I just try not to mention it round her unless she asks xx

 

[Lucky777]

thats just plain rude of her ... yes its hard to hear someone is pregnant after suffering losses or ttc and not getting anywhere! But that is no excuse to be rude. She is jealous. ignore her.

 

[mislaww]

I have a girlfriend who miscarried a baby the same time as me - we had the same due date! We had both been trying for quite some time. I was so afraid to tell her. She's been great about it and has made me feel a lot less guilty about all of it. Although it breaks my heart every time I see her and find she's not pregnant yet...

 

[lightweight]

Turns out one of the reasons she was upset was that someone else said when I announced I was pregnant "you don't have problems falling pregnant do you - what is it 3 times this year? - some people really struggle" and it seems that it was that, that really annoyed her (given the person who said it couldn't conceive a second time, it was a little insensitive!!)

 

[leannejkl]

well my sister is not speaking to me since i told her she said ' you are just set on f*ckin ur life up dont u relise what i have to go through each time you get pregnant your just selfish'

i have lost two babys one at 22 weeks and one at 4 months old (sids) and cos i have got pregnant again she thinks i am bad for doing it and not thinking of anyone else!!

i dont even know what to think about that.