Plan-a-holic given a gentle reality slap ;-)

[Bumblebee24]

Hi Ladies,

To cut a long story short, I am quite a plan-a-holic & minor control freak, brief example wedding already booked for 2015 lol .

I stopped taking the pill mid June this year my first 2-3 months have been hell, OPK, checking CM and numeracy ovulation fone apps. I thought baby making would be quite easy as all the ladies in my family said they conceived almost over night. I also have my mother in law to be on my back asking every other time I see her r u pregnant yet, wats taking you so long “STRESSFUL”

I am now into my 5th month of trying and only just now have a come to terms with the realization that babies can’t exactly be planned & I am much more at easy with things now.

My O.H likes wat he calls spontaneous , before TTC we usually did it roughly 2-3 times a week so wen it came to the lead up to wat I thought was O week-10days we where doing it every other day. Kind of took all the fun out of to be honest.

Sorry if TMI, but sometime my OH struggles to inside. We have been together for many years, at first it was down to being extra careful & not wanting to get pregnant but think it’s become more of a habit. So times not every time I can tell it’s affecting him & thinking too much about it, which i can tell is putting him off.

Anyway drifting slightly off the point of my post. I have finally realized that I am just going to enjoy the journey & the total surprise of when the time is right for me to get my BFP rather than try to plan the almost imposable.

Just looking for anyone in similar situation who want a good chat about anything from ttc to general every day life.

 

[bubbles82]

Hey!

This post could've been written by me! I had no idea it would be so difficult and unplannable, but I'm coming up to month 6 now, and my cycles have decided to wait til now to go crazy! I had no idea about charting and OPKs etc til I found this forum, but now I'm doing all of that and it all still seems far beyond my control! Even when I manage to spot O approaching, it's a whole new ball game getting DH to supply the goods!

 

[afwifey]

Good Luck on your journey. I agree just sit back and enjoy!

 

[Bumblebee24]

Bubbles82 are u TTC#1, I am. I have talked to my OH & tried to look up on the net if any1 else has this minor dilemma. I mean I cant make a baby alone . Have u been able to speak to ur hubby about it. The only thing mine says is that he feels it’s more of a habit & it’s just a case of breaking it, bless him.

Thanks afwifey I am just coming to terms with this but couldn't agree with u more All the best off luck to u, if u too are trying

 

[AZBabyDust]

Hi Ladies,

To cut a long story short, I am quite a plan-a-holic & minor control freak, brief example wedding already booked for 2015 lol .

I stopped taking the pill mid June this year my first 2-3 months have been hell, OPK, checking CM and numeracy ovulation fone apps. I thought baby making would be quite easy as all the ladies in my family said they conceived almost over night. I also have my mother in law to be on my back asking every other time I see her r u pregnant yet, wats taking you so long “STRESSFUL”

I am now into my 5th month of trying and only just now have a come to terms with the realization that babies can’t exactly be planned & I am much more at easy with things now.

My O.H likes wat he calls spontaneous , before TTC we usually did it roughly 2-3 times a week so wen it came to the lead up to wat I thought was O week-10days we where doing it every other day. Kind of took all the fun out of to be honest.

Sorry if TMI, but sometime my OH struggles to inside. We have been together for many years, at first it was down to being extra careful & not wanting to get pregnant but think it’s become more of a habit. So times not every time I can tell it’s affecting him & thinking too much about it, which i can tell is putting him off.

Anyway drifting slightly off the point of my post. I have finally realized that I am just going to enjoy the journey & the total surprise of when the time is right for me to get my BFP rather than try to plan the almost imposable.

Just looking for anyone in similar situation who want a good chat about anything from ttc to general every day life.

WOW! Are we twins?!? This is month #6 of TTC and NO LUCK! I am technically still in the TWW but I can tell it didn't happen this cycle and I'm getting all my typical pre-AF symptoms (due Nov. 13th). DH and I have pretty much lost our minds, mine because I'm obsessed with having a baby and him because he's had to deal with all my madness LOL

Either way, after the hundreds of dollars we've spent and all the stress it's caused, we decided to just drop it for now and switch from TTC to NTNP. DH made me promise no OPK's, no supplements, no timed BD'ing and no testing - only thing I'm allowed to is chart my BBT! Ugh... for me it is heartbreaking, especially after getting my hopes up month after month just to give up!

I'm hoping that relaxing and not trying will make the magic happen, although since we will have no clue when to BD I doubt it will (that's Hubby's plan LOL). A few months off might not be a bad idea, I guess I'm just bummed.

 

[afwifey]

Bumblebee24, I just got a BFP Yesterday!!! Thanks!!!! Dr. on thursday!

 

[Lovebug71210]

I started TTC last month and was the same way! Literally checking my cm mulitple times a day, stressing my temps werent "normal", taking a billion vitamins and herbs. I was so preoccupied with it that sex wasnt fun and I wasnt even having fun playing with my son because all I could think about was getting pregnant. After a really great (and sort of weird) conversation with my grandma I realized I was doing it all wrong!!! I met with my doctor a few days ago and she said that she doesnt know a single doctor that recommends charting or checking cm. The best advice she had was to bd every other day from cd 10-cd 20 and aside from that to relax and have fun. I am on a VERY normal cycle and I am currently 3 days late. Not because I am pregnant (I had blood work today, I know I am not), but because I was SO stressed I likely pushed off ovulation!!! No more!! From now on I am just having fun and when it happens it happens.

 

[Bumblebee24]

@AZBabayDust I hear u hun I think u should take the bull by the horns & go the whole hog. By this I mean not charting ur BBT, u have done so wel in dropping the OPK etc. By charting u will still have an idea of wen O is coming & knowing this u will subconsciously try to making sure BD happens rather than enjoying & relaxing.
I no, easier said than done. I feel ur upset hun, but realistically the average time length to get pregnant is 6-12months. I think we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to get pregnant, then at the point of givin up and relaxing the magic happens. Keep strong it will happen

@afwifey OHH GOSH WOW massive congratulations hun how long had u been NPNT

@Lovebug71210 To be honest I have to agree with you enjoy. I have read on here people doing it every day for 1-2weeks. Don’t get me wrong I do enjoy it but that is too much. Average I would say we do it 2 & possible on a good week 3 times a week so every other day is still too much & I mean i am only 24 LOL. Maybe I have a low sex drive but it has never bothered me or my OH before. Wen TTC I can’t see how u cud do it every day & work full time or look after other children & still have a loving healthy relationship like you said it would take over everything. Good Luck Lovebug

 

[bubbles82]

Yes I am TTC my first, feels impossible right now!

 

[Lovebug71210]

I think my biggest reality check was getting my first AF. With my son we decided to try and literally 8 days after deciding is when they think I got pregnant. I didnt even have time to worry about. I didnt even think I was pregnant, it just didnt seem possible to be that easy. So when DH and I decided mid cycle to have my IUD removed I sort of thought it would just happen again. And then AF showed up, early. I suddenly got freaked out and realized it could be hard and I overloaded myself with google info and other things. I am now days late, not pregnant, and still no AF. I stressed myself out so much I dont even know if I Oed. So my plan now is to put TTC on the back burner and just let it happen. I am starting P90X and dieting on Monday and I am going to put taking care of myself and my family first and getting pregnant second. Then when I reach my weight loss goal I will start using OPKs and worrying about when we are bding.

 

[afwifey]

@Bumblebee24, We have been NTNP for just a short amount of time. OH just decided when he came home the middle of September. He said if it's meant to be it will be! So either happened just after he got home or beginning of October.