PLEASE HELP 3 years old terrified of handdryer in public loo's

[ready2bamum]

My 3 year old son has just developed a terror of public toilets after a handryer went off in one unexpectedly (a really really loud one) last Thursday. Now he is completely and utterly terrified to even go In the toilet never mind use the loo...even if I tell him I wont turn it on, it cant hurt you etc etc. Ive showed him that its the same as my hair dryer etc (which is also loud and he is not scared of) but he's just terrified.

I took him to McDonalds (don't judge, it was a one off ) earlier before nursery thinking if there were anywhere he might be persuaded to go it would be there (with the promise of a balloon etc) but no he was absolutely terrified. I had to pick him up and take him in and pretend to change his sisters nappy (4 months old) he literally looked like he thinks its a monster or something.

Thing is I don't want to traumatise him but I want to normalise it for him...I don't know how to handle it....what should I do? how should I handle it. I was only just starting to feel free with him and the baby, walks out etc...and now this....help help help what can I do

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

Aidan went through a stage like this around the same age and it lasted a good few months. I just used to explain that he would be ok and that mummy was with him. I would pick him up and take him in and stand with him. I got him to wash his hands and didn't insist on him drying them. I also told him it was ok for him to cover his ears if he felt he needed too Hope this helps. It can be so awkward when your out and about and we did have a few toileting accidents. Juts keep reassuring him and re-enforcing that it won't hurt him x

 

[AP]

I hear ya, subscribing for replies! i have two kiddies like this. Tori is 3 and can't stand them. (neither can Alex but she has hyperacusis) It's a nightmare. Total nightmare.

 

[ready2bamum]

ah thank god im not alone...Ive been so upset about it...for him and for me..coz ive only just started to feel free after having the baby we were doing some lovely walks to park etc and I was just feeling I can manage having two kids and then this...I mean what am I supposed to do when I have to change his sister...im going to have to go into the toilets aren't I...do you think I should just keep taking him in with me even if he is hysterical, I don't want him to associate wee's and poo's with trauma...as he might become constipated......xx

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

If your on your own you have to take him in hun. Maybe take something in with him so he can be distracted? x

 

[dani_tinks]

Jacob still hates them and he's 4.5! We avoid toilets we know have loud hand dryers, but it's not always possible. The other thing i've had to do is cover his ears for him whilst he does his business. Really tricky!

 

[lau86]

My son is afraid too... He will constantly say I don't like that don't turn that on when we go to the toilet. I just try to say I won't turn it on, it's ok it won't hurt you. And I dry his hands with a paper towel or muslin.
In my mind there's not a lot you can do if he needs the toilet, just try and make it as quick as possible and reassure as much as you can.

 

[Plex]

My little boy is terrified of them and has been since i can remember - i think its the ones that sound bloomin loud like jet engines that scared him first and ever since then hes had a complete phobia bless him. I have to say though that they do make me jump when they go off sometimes there too noisy x

 

[pinkpolkadot]

Yes my DD is the same, terrified! She will say she needs a wee and then change her mind and I know it's because she has remembered about the hand dryer! She is even scared of anything that resembles one like a tissue paper dispenser, air freshener etc...

I just have to reassure her I won't turn it on or tell a little white lie and say there isn't one in there and I can usually get her in and just hope nobody turns it on! If I can I will take her in the baby change so it is just us in there and nobody will turn it on. If someone does then I just have to pick her up (if she hasn't already leapt on me!!), hug her and reassure her, hopefully she will get used to it soon!

 

[lj2245]

My son was the same at around 3 years, he is now almost 9. There is a switch you can use on the wall above the dryer to turn it off. If my son was being particularly anxious I'd flick it off until we were leaving (assuming the toilets were empty) and would flick them back on when we left. Over time my son got older and less scared of noise and now he doesn't even remember ever being scared of them.

The Dyson ones that make your skin flap were a brilliant source of amusement (still are tbh) and I'm pretty sure his boyish curiosity and desire to have disgusting skin took over his fear of the noise.

 

[HelenJane]

My daughter doesn't like them either. She will come to the toilet with me but she wont want the hand dryer turning on. Like above, we will have to use toilet paper or a muslin. I think you just have to keep reassuring them as best you can and eventually they'll come round I'm sure

 

[Zephram]

My 20 month old is scared of the hand dryer too. Not to the point he won't go in the public loos, but if I forget and use it he absolutely melts down in terror. I usually let my hands air dry. I figure he'll get over it at some point. As a side note he also hates my hair dryer and is occasionally iffy with the vacuum cleaner.

 

[sam2eb]

I used to just use the disabled loo and switch them off if there was a switch.

My son is almost 6 now and was scared of them for years. He's OKish with them now, he even put his hands under one the other day. He has autism and he hated the noise and how they appear to come on unexpectedly. I started by using the hairdryer round him more, then blowing the hairdryer at him. Then using the hand dryer myself around him, even just for a few seconds. It's taken a few years but it's worked!

I've also heard that that showing kids clips of hand dryers on youtube can help them see that they aren't scary things.

 

[ready2bamum]

Hi everyone, thanks for the replies. I took him to the offending toilet today (the one that kicked it off for him) with his little friend, I thought If she uses it and isn't scared then he might go for it or at least it would reassure him. No....still terrified, he was crying his eyes out, this is outside while we held the door open so he could watch his friend...he kept saying no Mummy No Mummy too scary...poor little lad. I feel so sorry for him...and for me....ive got to travel on the train for 4 hours with him on fri...my god, how are we going to cope. He is not scared of my hairdryer or the hoover or the lawnmower or drills...its just these blinkin handryers....I tried the you tube thing and that terrified him even more. xx

 

[dan-o]

Both mine have purple screaming fits when the hand dryer goes off!

My littlest one is also scared of the mini food processor we make houmous in and the upright Hoover if it startles him or gets too close!

 

[Dawnlouise30]

it may sound a bit extreme but would wearing ear defenders help (the kind you put on when watching cars race etc - think they are like giant headphones but better.

 

[bumpbear]

My little girl is afraid of them too (and of automatic toilet flushes in public toilets where they go off unexpectedly).

I just keep telling her that mummy won't let anything hurt her as long as she is with me and that at least gets her to come in with me.

 

[george83]

My 3 year old has had the same fear for a few weeks now which just randomly came on we didn't even have an obvious cause for the start of it. We try and use the disabled loo where possible but I have literally had to drag him in the normal ones while he's grabbing his winkle jumping up and down about to wet himself all while telling me he doesn't need to go. I have noticed as well though that in the disabled toilets he isn't even phased by them and walks right underneath it.

 

[CaptainMummy]

My dd won't go near them either. She presses herself against the opposite wall and tells me not to put it on, as we walk past. She isn't as bad as she used to be, as she used to get the biggest fright and cry whenever anybody turned it on. Now, she doesn't really bother if someone else has it on when she is in the toilet, just won't come out until it's off. I just use paper towels/toilet roll to dry her hands, don't really see a big deal. I always tell her it's fine and lots of other children use them, but she doesn't have to if not wanted.

She uses the one at nursery though... But it's pathetic and would probably take about 20 minutes to dry your hands!

 

[Bevziibubble]

My LO is exactly the same. I dread having to take her into a public toilet as she is so scared and SCREAMS everytime someone used the hand drier. Often she will recombined that it's a public toilet and start crying before we even go in