Question for ladies who planned their rainbows.

[MissyBee]

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[kazine]

It's so not easy. I TTC again and got pregnant in January and then lost that baby too and now I'm pregnant again straight away. It's definitely not easy in fact it's very hard and I'm worrying 24/7. Don't think it's any harder or easier when it was planned for, as long as the baby is very wanted you're always going to worry about having another MC.

 

[MissyBee]

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[kazine]

It's so not easy. I TTC again and got pregnant in January and then lost that baby too and now I'm pregnant again straight away. It's definitely not easy in fact it's very hard and I'm worrying 24/7. Don't think it's any harder or easier when it was planned for, as long as the baby is very wanted you're always going to worry about having another MC.

Oh my, I didn't mean to come across as saying that I think it's easy on anyone I know it's hard. I was just wondering if maybe I could have handled this better if I had expected it, and wondered if ladies who had planned ahead might be better able to sort through the emotions.

I'm sorry of it sounded like I was downplaying your or anyone's pain or struggles; that really was not my intention.

Oh no! Sorry if I sounded mean, I didn't mean it. Just saying I think it's just as hard no matter whether you're prepared or not.

 

[Kasey84]

Congrats on your rainbow missybee

I'm almost 35 weeks pregnant with our rainbow, who was very much planned. Nonetheless, this pregnancy has been a struggle emotionally. Like you, I thought the worry would stop at a certain point...for me I thought it would get easier after 14 weeks, which was when I lost my first. Really though, I didn't breathe easy until after my 20 week anatomy scan that showed a healthy baby boy. Up until that point I even had trouble bonding with my baby. I think the fear of something going wrong held me back from forming an attachment.

I do still worry, but it's much more tolerable then it was in the beginning.

I hope your worry eases with time as well. Take things one day at a time and don't be hard on yourself about your feelings. Wishing you all the best!

 

[eyemom]

We knew our hearts would be in our throats, but there's still no real preparing for it I don't think. Some days I'm a mess, though I'm trying to stay positive. Just taking it one day at a time I guess.

 

[Starry Night]

My DS was a planned rainbow and that was the most anxious, scary time of my life. After a couple of more losses I am now expecting a second planned rainbow so you'd think I'd have been more prepared. Nope. I am a neurotic wreck. It's a little better this time because the pregnancy has been fairly normal whereas I had loads of bleeding and other issues with my sons' pregnancy (I was in the ER at least once a week throughout first tri). But I still freak out and I won't feel safe until she's here in my arms.

I think it's hard every time because we know how precious these little lives are to us and we know how much it hurts to have them taken away. My best coping method has been to set little milestones. Looking ahead to the due date is so intimidating. I still live week to week and it's been months since my final loss milestone.

 

[EarthMama]

NO it's not easy and I wanted this baby and planned and planned and dreamed and dreamed...

I am CRAZY right now, I worry about everything, I'm crazy emotional, about 10x more emotional then I was with my son's (and first) pregnancy. It's a roller-coaster all right. Glad I'm not alone. I definitely did not realize I would be hit with all these crazy irrational emotions when I got pregnant again and held the pregnancy.