rantttt!

[Leah_xx]

....

 

[kirst1805]

xx

 

[AbbynChloe]

sorry to hear he is being such a pain, these FOB's know how to wind us up and which buttons to push. At least at the end of the day you know the truth, you know you've been there for Gracelynn, and no one should make you feel bad for having a life. boys just dont get it! xxxxxxxx

 

[Rhio92]

x

 

[bloodbinds]

Hun, if i were you i would be glad he is asking to see her at all! Some FOBs would rather spend the day playing on playstation when they have the day to themselves - it's good to hear that when he is free he wants to see his daughter. I'm sure you would prefer that over him not wanting to see her at all.

Remember, this is about your daughter, not about him and not about you. And i'm sure you want your daughter to spend time with her dad as much as possible. Though he shouldn't expect you to drop everything just because he is suddenly free, but you shouldn't make things awkward though, just because you're annoyed he's only seen her for 15 minutes this week.
Bella would love 15 minutes a week with her dad, i'm sure, however she's only spent 6 hours with him her entire life.

I know it's annoying, and FOBs are a pain in the ass, just try and make things as easy as possible, and try to have a good as relationship with him as possible, it will make things so much easier for all of you! x

 

[Leah_xx]

Hun i try to have a good relationship with him for gracelynn sake but he blows it all out of the water. He honestly doesnt care about anything but himself. he stops by for those five minutes to just say hey im a dad i see my kid. ANd he has told me that before.
So him wanting to see her when he is free for a 5 minutes is better?
cause thats wht he does.
He told me straight forward when he has nothing better to do he will see her for 5 minutes.
Im tired of him pulling this card that he is the best dad in the world to his family and friends and he puts his friends and everything else first.

 

[kelzyboo]

I don't agree that 5 minutes is better than nothing, seriously whats the point?
If he cannot make proper time to see and bond with his child then he shouldn't have any time at all in my opinion, as she gets older the 5 minute visits will confuse and disrupt her and add nothing at all to her care and upbringing, i think its worse than not seeing her at all!

If he didn't get his act together i'd withdraw all contact and let him fight for it, he probably wouldn't by the sounds of him but he would probably drop out of her life in the end anyway, when something comes along thats more important. She deserves to be a priority, not something to do when he's bored, i wouldn't allow it at all, its not fair to her and although shes not old enough to understand how badly he's treating her, one day she will be and it will be worse for her than no contact at all! xx

 

[bloodbinds]

I don't agree that 5 minutes is better than nothing, seriously whats the point?
If he cannot make proper time to see and bond with his child then he shouldn't have any time at all in my opinion, as she gets older the 5 minute visits will confuse and disrupt her and add nothing at all to her care and upbringing, i think its worse than not seeing her at all!

If he didn't get his act together i'd withdraw all contact and let him fight for it, he probably wouldn't by the sounds of him but he would probably drop out of her life in the end anyway, when something comes along thats more important. She deserves to be a priority, not something to do when he's bored, i wouldn't allow it at all, its not fair to her and although shes not old enough to understand how badly he's treating her, one day she will be and it will be worse for her than no contact at all! xx

Terrible advice. Do not withdraw contact with FOB for any reason other than abuse/addictions etc not because you want him to fight for it, because if he doesn't for any reason then you have deprived your daughter of her father, and you'll be the one having the explain that to her when she's older!

 

[kelzyboo]

I'd withdraw contact because he's treating his daughter like a toy he can pick up and put down when he feels like it, thats not for nothing! Thats to protect the child from emotional harm, which she will suffer if it carries on!

If he doesn't fight for it thats his fault not hers, he obviously doesn't care if he won't give up his time to make an effort to get contact established properly.

We have the right to protect our kids from emotional harm and disruption aswell as anything else, in some cases it can be just as damaging for a child. This is what i would do, i believe deeply in stability and he's not providing that at the moment, maybe it would be a wake up call for him to get his act together, maybe he wouldn't bother but if he didn't, is that the kind of father a child needs?

I know some people say that any father, however rubbish and inconsistant is better than none at all but thats not my opinion.

 

[Leah_xx]

Gracelynn knows already what her dad is doing to her. When he was in the picture she would smile and hug him and kiss him,
Now when he does see her she screams, cries turns away from him,
I dont got to worry about makingf him fight for her.
He hasnt seen her since umm let me think maybe thursday for 5 mins.
He doesnt and isnt worried about seeing her.
He is checkin up on me makin sure im not doing anything

 

[Leah_xx]

Well I called him to discuss him seeing gracelynn
and well he screamed at me saying i always had plans.
i had plans the one time and he called me at the last minute
so he was screaming at me saying he wasnt in the fing mood

 

[kelzyboo]

You and your beautiful daughter do not deserve to be treated that way, all decisions are ultimately yours and you must do what you feel is best for your daughter, not what anyone else thinks! She will always know that whatever you did was for her, what you believed was the best for her.

My mum stopped my dad seeing me when i was a baby, i have contact with him now and we get on great (hes even coming to my 3d scan) but i see in him what she saw, he isn't reliable or consistant and i thank my mother with all my heart for not putting me through that as a child, now its my choice to see him or not and i've accepted that he's never going to be the dad i want, hes great though, now i'm an adult and i understand. My mum did the right thing, i will never hate her for it, i love her for it!

Thats just me, i hope you sort something out because hes not being fair to her and thats not how a dad behaves xx