Reassurance for natural birth

[Katy Bug]

I *plan* on having a natural birth in a small hospital. I don't want an epidural unless I just can't take the pain, but I have a fairly moderate tolerance for pain. Of course I would take pills for cramps when I had my period but if I could get rid of it naturally via a heating pad or a bowel movement (weird but it works) then I would and skip the pills. Same goes with headaches. I wait it out unless I just can't sleep because of the headache. I find pain to be more of a nuisance than anything so I'm hoping I can handle this.

I do want reassurance for one thing, though. It isn't doing it natural or labor or birth that scares me. It's DYING that scares me. I know the mortality rate during childbirth is fairly low and rare, and more than likely happens with high risk pregnancies or extreme complications. But it really scares me. Going without medication reassures me some, because I know if I don't go with an epidural I won't have complications from medications. However, I'm so afraid of my blood pressure dropping or bleeding out or something. I know it's a normal thing and I shouldn't be afraid since I have no health problems and my pregnancy is healthy so far. I just can't seem to get past this. Ever since my sister told me, "You come the closest to dying during childbirth" I've been so scared. I absolutely hate her for saying that to me! Because up until that point I was fine. Then my other sister tried to reassure me by saying "I think you're most alive during childbirth, because you're fighting to get something out of you".

Either way, it scares me. I've always been afraid of death. I just keep thinking how medicine would take away the pain but it wouldn't be able to help if my blood pressure dropped or anything. Doing it natural seems the best way to avoid further complications, but I also know if I have medicine I won't feel like I'm dying either (because I imagine feeling that great deal of pain would make one think they are dying since they are in the moment).

Thoughts or any reassurance?

 

[frisbeemama12]

well it is probably the most painful thing a woman goes through.. yet I kid you not the INSTANT that baby is out the contractions are NOT as painful at ALL! its seriously like a switch! Just remember that there are women who go and have babies out in the middle of nowhere and both are healthy and fine. Yes there are unfortunate tragedies but then again you getting into your car in the morning carries its own risk that you might die in a wreck.
Giving birth is one of the most natural things our bodies simply DO. The more fear you have the more painful its going to be, just like how they say to relax your body before getting a shot or anything, same thing applies.. trying to relax and simply moving your body into the position it WANTS to be in for the baby and birth is the absolute best thing you can do. Try your best not to dwell on it, Im interested as to why your sister said such a thing to you because while yes its quite painful I never felt like I was close to dying hahahaha

 

[Katy Bug]

Whew, thanks for making me feel better. And you're right, I could wake up tomorrow, get in my car and have a wreck in die so that makes me feel better about it. I can't control what happens so I should just let it go.

Well it's funny about my sister because she's pregnant too but with her first as well like me! I'm sure a lot of women feel like they're dying because they're in so much pain but she shouldn't scare me by saying that. Anyway, it's comforting that you said the pain goes away once the baby is out, because I have heard everyone say that who has done it natural. My best friend's mom had 10 children, 9 of them natural, and she said the same thing, that when it was all done her pain was instantly gone.

I imagine it's like having the worst bowel movement you can think of that happened in your life. And once you "let it all out" your stomach felt much better. Of course I'm sure childbirth is much worse but that's just an example of the pain being gone once it's out. Thanks again!

 

[PhotoLC]

That was my biggest fear, too. Trying to get over it because I realize it's a totally irrational fear considering I'm healthy and low risk.

 

[Donch03]

Your body was MADE to bear children. Its nothing to be frightened of because its a completely normal life event. Your body knows what to do and will put into place everything it needs to birth your baby and keep you safe. The amazing way your hormones stimulate contractions to the endorphins that kick in to deal with the pain. The best thing you can do is relax as this will enable all thosr aspects to work correctly. I would talk to your MW if you really cannot get passed the thought of dying but dont let it get the better of you. You are a strong healthy women about to embark on the most amazing journey xx