relax, it will happen.....

[Blue12]

Dont people get that if there are fertility issues that relaxing is NOT going to make it happen.... if there are no eggs or sperm is damaged.... is relaxing REALLY going to make baby???

So true Samba!!! I know someone who conceived their first month asked me if I had tried THE SECRET yet. (It is a popular book/movie - where whatever you believe will come to be). I flat out said I don't think the secret can defy medical issues.

Another friend of mine said to me don't give up and never lose hope cause I know someone who tried for 6 years and they ended up pregnant so it will happen. Like that is encouraging or a guarantee thing then, so great I have another 3 years of ttc. I have already been ttc for 3 and ntnp for another 10.

 

[rome]

My DH and I have been trying for year and half... I want to scream, kick, and yell when people say things like that. They don't know how it feels when you live week to week when ttc! They don't know what it feels like having to endure the crazy emotional roller coaster every month. The only thing I can do is keep my distance from the many women who got got pg during the time we have been trying. That is the only way to make it through right now even if it means isolating myself from good friends. Ahhh... venting to people who "get it," helps.

 

[Szaffi]

Sorry for butting in from the pregnancy boards... We've been TTC for almost 2 years, so I've heard this phrase many many time from people and it sent me up the wall every time with rage (especially when it came from my mother, MIL, etc.)

We've finally concieved after lots of exams (that gave no answers) in a typical TTC month of sex on schedule, etc (lots of stress, not much fun).
The irony is that when it turned out I'm pregnant, everyone who knew about us TTC said to us that "they'd knew it would happen if we'd only stop stressing about it" I'd like to scream at the clueless people sometimes.

Good luck and babydust to all you girls! I totally understand if you want to keep your distance from these "experts"...

 

[Blue12]

As devastating as it has been for me to receive news that both my tubes are blocked and both may need to be removed along with having pcos - that my only option is ivf - it makes me so tempted to say to people see - there was no amount of relaxing that could unblock my tubes!!! Of course I won't tell them - it is none of their business.

 

[brooklyn1]

if you can believe it, even my gynecologist said this to me. When I went to see her after 7 months ttc (I'm 38 so this is considered enough time to diagnose infertility) she said "I see you pregnant, don't worry" (that was with no testing or further information) then when she found out I'd have some time off over the summer she said, "oh you'll be relaxed, it will happen this summer for sure." Now that it is the end of the summer and I'm not pregnant, I'm even more angry at this response. It's very condescending to imply that it's our attitudes about it or our stress levels that are keeping us from conceiving or that we shouldn't be worried about what's going on in our bodies. Needless to say, I've since been to a FS and they are far more clinical about the process!

 

[subaru555]

My FS said this to me.....there's not much hope if that's what FS's have come to say

 

[readyforbaby]

I want to slap the next person that says this. Like they have it all figured out and me, with 5 years off any form of birth control, natural ttc, clomid, and sex at all the "right" times, plus those other relaxing times too and beforehand and no successful pregnancy and now off to the RE. Hmm... this coming from people who look confused when I say worlds like "ovulation" or "luteal phase" or "cervical mucous". Yes you grand ones, YOU have it all figured out. Wish I didn't know anything then I might be knocked up! Ok, sorry for the rant, just SO sick of this comment and it is now apparent it is just something people say because they can't figure out what else to say.

 

[Nathyrra]

I must be very lucky because I haven't actually had this particular comment before in RL Trying to think, but pretty sure I haven't. Funnily enough, the only place I've heard it is on this forum. Rather tragic.

It's a pretty standard response I guess. No thought involved, as easy as saying; 'hello, how are you?' when meeting someone, when the person asking doesn't really want to know how you are. Just a standard idiotic comment.