Sad and confused....

[natasja32]

Hi girls....Hope you are all well.

Ive been so all over the place the last few weeks. We lost our little boy Bodhi last year at 36.4 weeks due to a placental abruption. Its been a year now and i miss him everyday. I think about him before i go to bed and when i wake up in the morning. Im pregnant with another little boy and the last few days my emotions have really confused me. I seem to be missing him even more now,when im at my last of my pregnancy... I dont know why but its awfull....it feels almost the same as the day we lost him. Sorry for the morbid thread but wasnt really sure where to post it. Hope ive not upset or scared anyone.

 

[3 girlies]

 

[hekate]

I am sorry you are having a hard time!
I expect it is partly to do with being near the time you lost bodhi....maybe because you physically feel the way you have done in the last few weeks with bodhi, it makes you feel emotionally like when he was born/passed away....not sure if I am making any sense here....but a week or so ago when I was feeling really rough with sickness and all it just so reminded me about the time when I was pregnant with Indi and I felt all upset, because I thought if this is how I felt and I feel like this now then it will all end the same way.....I know I am not far along yet, but I am so scared of when I will be feeling movement as I am really worried that it will remind me too much of loosing my son! sorry for rambling!
hope tomorrow will be more gentle on you!

 

[izzysmummy]

You are in the right place for support! My heart truly goes out to you, i am sure everything will be ok this time. I had a friend who lost her baby at 37 weeks last September, they never knew the reason why as everything was ok with her placenta.

She is currently 22 weeks pregnant with another boy, and she too is very anxious. The Dr's are going to induce her at 37 weeks this time, just incase.

Take care of yourself x

 

[pink_bow]

 

[nicholatmn]

 

[Carmello_01]

I can't offer anything constructive, I can only send love and best wishes and massive

 

[lauralora]

huge hugs to you hun xxx

 

[maybebaby3]

i'm sure it's perfectly normal 2 feel like u r. grief comes in waves and really a year is not that long a period of time 2 get over something as traumatic as losing a baby, especially so near to your due date. maybe when you have your new baby safely in your arms then you will feel more at peace.

 

[Jox]

i think the reason you feel this way now is this is the point that you had your last few weeks with Bodhi...now you have a baby boy in your tummy again BUT its not bodhi.

It must be hard....i feel i didnt 'finish' my pregnancy with kasper...it just ended iykwim so i know when i pass 36 weeks with this one it will be abit like im finishing the pregnancy for both beanie and for kasper...does that make sense??

xxx

 

[SugarKisses]

hugs x

 

[jennyellen13]

lots of love and hugs to you hun xx x xx x xx

 

[Tulip]

Nothing constructive I can say Nat except I'm sure the way you're feeling is completely normal and you will get through it, the way you've powered your way through the last year. Big kisses xxx

 

[natasja32]

Thanks for all the replies girls. Im just having a rubbish day today too. Hubby has been very distant last few days plus very snappy which always seems to be aimed at me. I dont know what ive done... Ive asked him and he says his fine,but i can clearly see he isnt. He doesnt talk about Bodhi much anymore and doesnt seem to want to talk about this little man im carrying now. I just feel so alone at the moment and just like im on my own with this pregnancy. Im so tired of feeling like this and not being able to talk to him. Ive got to ask him for cuddles when im down which doesnt help as he should be doing out of his own. I just dont feel loved or wanted at the moment.

 

[Mommy2Kian]

Hi hun can i just say what a beautiful angel, i havnt seen that pic before xXx

you're so close to holding your baby now u are probably feeling nervouse, anxious etc, im sure your little angel is with you and is looking after his mommy and baby brother...xXx

 

[Tulip]

Gorgeous picture of Bodhi, babes. OH is probably feeling exactly the same as you are but doesn't want to express it (I dunno - men not wanting to show eakness or not wanting to upset you?) xxx

 

[Worrisome]

I agree with Tulip Tash, he is probably feeling the same as you, but doesnt want to confront it. Men have funny ways sometimes, you take care hun Were all here for you