Scan yesterday at 9 weeks 1 day showed baby dies in last 24 hours

[mitchnorm]

Something made me go for that scan.......a peculiar feeling, fear that something was wrong......they checked externally and internally, 3 different people as loss was so recent. Am booked in for SMM...surgical procedure on Monday. Just want it over quickly...I still feel pregnant. I am currently in depression with the odd denial thrown in.

What if they are wrong and heartbeat suddenly starts again!!!???

Tell me this passes soon......how quickly can we try again, I'm 42 and feel time is ticking ALOT!!!!

I told only a few people who now know about the loss but I feel like I want to scream and shout at people who didn't know....on Facebook......I am/was pregnant ffs....stop acting normal with me. I want people to know a baby existed. Is this normal????

 

[Mummy1506]

Really sorry to hear you're going through this, I just knew my pregnancy wasn't going well right from the off but tried to remain positive however it didn't end well. A natural miscarriage, we saw a tiny baby & heartbeat 2 days before the heavy bleeding so hard to come to terms with but I want to start ttc ASAP but my cycle is being strange at the moment I'm only day 19 since the miscarriage so who knows when ttc can resume!

I hope everything goes as well as it can for you & get your rainbow baby asap!!

ps. I deactivated my fb account just because I don't want to see everyone's happy life or baby/pregnancy stuff, I'm sure it will pass for us but just can't deal with that right now.

Again sorry to hear what you're going through.

 

[mitchnorm]

Really sorry to hear you're going through this, I just knew my pregnancy wasn't going well right from the off but tried to remain positive however it didn't end well. A natural miscarriage, we saw a tiny baby & heartbeat 2 days before the heavy bleeding so hard to come to terms with but I want to start ttc ASAP but my cycle is being strange at the moment I'm only day 19 since the miscarriage so who knows when ttc can resume!

I hope everything goes as well as it can for you & get your rainbow baby asap!!

ps. I deactivated my fb account just because I don't want to see everyone's happy life or baby/pregnancy stuff, I'm sure it will pass for us but just can't deal with that right now.

Again sorry to hear what you're going through.

So sorry for your loss I think I am entering denial......my boobs are more sore today than the last 2-3.....is that normal? I have been told they won't rescan on Monday before the surgery.....I am worried in case HB has come back. Tell me I am being silly.....they say it's not usual to check and they are 110%

 

[Mummy1506]

I guess you will be still getting symptoms with the amount of HCG in your body. I don't know regarding a heart beat being seen after but there are some stories that you hear of! It's your body & your baby so if you feel 1 more scan will make you more comfortable then tell them that. it may not be procedure for them to do that but at the end of the day if it doesn't feel right for you to go ahead then make them do another one.

 

[hopie2015]

Mitchnorm I am so very sorry for your loss. There really are no words.. I know how you are feeling, as in February I went in for first scan at 9.5 weeks and also was told baby developed up until the last day but there was no heartbeat found. I had u/s at doctor's office and then one at the hospital later that day. Doctor told me hospital had the best equipment and could tell for sure. Sadly the hospital doctor agreed with my doctor with 100% certainty.
I am the same age as you, so felt as this was my one and only chance. (I have no children). I went into denial. I waited 5 days at home and still had pg symptoms - incredibly nauseous. I stopped taking my progesterone pills, did not experience any spotting in those 5 days and did think to have one more scan done before the procedure. The doctor said that was pointless to do. But do remember- it is your body and baby and your OWN decision if you want to have a third scan to put your mind at ease, I say do it.
I trusted in what my doctors and fiance said (he looked at ultrasound- I could not) and went ahead with the procedure without a third scan. I still do think sometimes - what if a heartbeat was missed and would have been heard again. I know in my heart of hearts that is my wishful thinking. But for you- go with your gut feeling and get that third scan again if you feel most comfortable.

Hope I made sense. It is a tragic experience but do know that time and support will get you through. If this loss is confirmed, most doctors advise waiting 1-3 months before trying again, but I know what you mean by being over 40. I do have to say that all the girls in my miscarriage support group amazingly all got pregnant their first try after their miscarriages.
Please take extra good care of yourself. xxxx

 

[mitchnorm]

Thanks hopie and sorry for your loss.

I went in Monday morning for the surgery......I asked the doctor for a repeat scan to confirm...he said it wasn't normal procedure but would check. Was expecting them to come through and say no and wheel me to theatre....but in came a porter and off I went to epu. Shame I had to sit with others in my gown waiting but it was confirmed. Sonographer said was I sure I wanted to go through with it as I was obviously upset but I said 100% and you know what....it gave me some peace, clarity and closure.

Procedure went fine and I have had no bleeding, very little cramping. Hoping that's a sign thatdocotor did a good job of clearing everything.

I want to start ttc before next af but unlikely my hubby will go for it. Off to find a good group on here to get advise..... X x x

 

[LoraLoo]

I'm so very sorry.
I was 18 weeks when the scan showed our baby had died. Although, like you, I had that feeling, I remember the shock, disbelief and horror to be told there was no heartbeat.
We started Ttc almost straight away too, why do you think hubby won't want to?
I'm glad you now feel some closure, I hope your physical healing is quick. Much love x

 

[mitchnorm]

Loraloo.....sorry for your loss......did you get your bfp afterwards?

I think hubby is a little shellshocked by it......worried it would happen again, worried my body needs to recover I guess. Hes a worrier rather than getting carried away

 

[LoraLoo]

I think they worry about us. They see our heartbreak and the thought of seeing us go through it again is unbearable for them to think about.
We lost Alfie in the September snd I got my bfp the following february. She's 20 months now 😊

 

[hopie2015]

Mitchnorm- you are so strong and brave! I am glad to hear you found some peace after that last scan and great you have had no real bleeding, etc. after the procedure. Yes, that does mean your doctor did a perfect job - I was lucky enough to have that same experience after wards. I am glad they respected your decision nicely about wanting another scan.

Sometimes I still think - should I have gotten a third. But I know the baby was gone.

Please let me know if you find a good group with advice. Seems we are the same age. I would have probably tried again but soon after I experienced serious illnesses with both my parents and so my life was put on hold the past 5 months. Now thankfully they seem to be doing better and thinking of ttc again but worried with the age issue!

Take extra good care this week and spoil yourself. Glad DH sounds like a great support to you! Mine worries too ..a lot!

 

[mitchnorm]

Thanks hopie 48 hours after the surgery I think depression has hit. Hubby and I still haven't had the conversation about trying again....I am 42....I know ideally I need to wait for af then try next cycle but time is ticking away for me.

Good luck with ttc.....fingers crossed for us both.

 

[hopie2015]

Oh, I sure know what you mean by time ticking at this age. Sometimes I wonder if I have a chance but do believe where there's a will there's a way.
Sorry the depression hit. To be expected with the hormone change and of course your loss. I'm really sorry. Take extra good care of yourself and spoil yourself rotten this next week. Glad you have DH for comfort. Yes, mine also has been scared to approach the subject of trying again, as your DH probably doesn't want to bring it up at all, so when you feel ready in coming weeks you can.

Thanks -- yes -- Fingers crossed for us both!!

 

[dairymomma]

My doctor says to wait at least one cycle so as my uterus has time to heal and my hormones have time to settle again. After I had a D&C for a miscarriage, my doctor told me to wait at least one cycle too so my uterus could recover from the procedure and my lining could regenerate properly. It's also possible you won't ovulate this cycle anyway. I know after my first few losses, I didn't ovulate until I got my period that first time because my hormones were still a bit screwy.