Sentences I never thought I would say.... *

[TwinsAgain]

"Do not teach your brothers how to finger poo paint."

"Why are you licking the couch?"

"We do not sniff butts like the dogs."

"The trash can lid is not for sledding down stairs."

"You broke your arm can lid stair sledding, why are you doing it again?"

"No, you can not pop a wheelie on your trike."

"We do not stick duct tape on the chicks in the brooder. No, it doesn't turn them into ducks."

"That's a shirt, not pants."

"We do not stick price stickers on baby brothers."

"That's a kitchen cabinet, not a bed."

"The top of the refrigerator is not an acceptable seat."

Twins -

"Do not use your brother as a step stool/Do not be a step stool."

"Why are you sitting in the (empty) fire place?"

"Stop climbing those gates."

"Your sandbox is not a potty."

"Stop chewing on your father's baseball glove."

"Stop chewing on the hockey pucks."

"I give you teething things, stop chewing on the slimy rawhide you took from the dog."

"We do not split our food with the dogs."

"Ew, don't lick the raw turkey defrosting in the fridge."

 

[ruby09]

"Don't drink the bath water! You just peed in there!"

 

[Sarah lo]

No, you can't eat your yogurt with a syringe

 

[dairymomma]

I'm laughing so hard after reading these...My contributions are as follows:

"Take that muddy shoe out of your mouth."

"Stop licking your sister's feet."

"You just stuck your tongue on the metal gate last week. Why did you do it again?" *to the 3 year old girl who found out what happens with tongue meets metal outdoors in the frigid winter weather we get*

"You need to grow up and go to school and graduate before you can get married." *said to the 4 year old boy having a temper tantrum because he wanted to get married*

"No you can't marry Mommy. Daddy married Mommy and you can only marry one person at a time." *he was sobbing almost incoherently when he found this out*

"What's chicken Doo-two?" (It was the now 5 year old's attempt to explain fried chicken. No clue how he got that descriptive title though...)

"No, those people across the room don't want to see Mommy's chest."

 

[Mysunshine]

I've found myself saying some weird stuff since becoming a mum but these are just today's!

"Take that stegosaurus out of your mouth!"

"No that's mummy's special grown up calpol" (night nurse)

"Yes the boy cats have willies, just like little boys have willies"

"I don't think dinosaurs like milk baths"

WOw looks like your kids are so fond of dinos! My son will be fours soon but he doesn't seem much interested in dinosaurs, but some of his friends apparently are..I wonder if I will also be saying same things like what you shared!

 

[Vickie]

"Rhys *please* stop roaring at my cats" said as he runs full pelt at my poor cats and yells out a screaming roar. *sigh*. My cats are going to have a heart attack because of him

 

[hellohefalump]

'Stop taking photos of your bum'

'Take your hands out of your trousers'

'No I don't want to smell your bum'

.... lol it's all about bums in our house

 

[Bevziibubble]

Lol!

 

[ClairAye]

'Stop taking photos of your bum'

Found some of these browsing through my gallery once, ffs. Kids!!!

 

[AP]

No Tori it’s bath time there’s no time to pole dance

 

[luz]

Stop sticking your hands in your butt!
Quit putting those toys down your diaper!
Don't put the toys in your mouth, you just had them in your diaper!

kids.....