September/October loss thread

[LouOscar01]

Thought it would be nice to have somewhere we could talk as we are all going through the same thing at about the same time. Some of us were on pregnancy threads together as well.

Let's support each other and get ourselves thinking positively for trying again.

Feel free to share your story or your worries and concerns. I'm sure many of us will be feeling similar things.

 

[LouOscar01]

My little clomid baby stopped growing at 7 and a half weeks. We had heard the heartbeat and all seemed well (except that it measured 3 days small on the first scan, but according to them it had grown enough by the second). I felt worried after a tiny amount of spotting and had a scan at 9w5d. I saw straight away that my baby was no longer 'flashing'.

We had been trying for 14 months and got pregnant on our 3rd ovulation from Clomid. I'm hoping I can get pregnant as quickly again once back on the Clomid.

I've never felt so sad or despondent. I'm trying to desperately cling on to the fact that I know I CAN get pregnant. I want so desperately to be pregnant again and the thought of going back to work or normality before that has happened seems impossible.

I've taken a month off work so far. I'm a complete mess but trying to cling on to positives.

To motivate myself I am going to make a list of all the vitamins/minerals that my partner and I need to generate healthy sperm and eggs. I've found an app that is able to tell you how much nutrition is in what you eat. It's called 'wholesome' and it's great. I've read that women with multiple miscarriages were able to prevent miscarriages just by changing their diet. Fingers crossed it has an impact. I didn't eat terribly before but there may have been 2 or 3 vital vitamins that I was missing out on.

Sorry for the essay!!

 

[c beary83]

Hi. I'll join.

 

[minties]

What a lovely idea. Gosh that seems absolutely rotten and so unfair that you put so much love and effort into getting pregnant, to have the rug ripped out from under your feet. I am so very, very sorry.

I've had a lot of trouble with fertility in the past, we spent many years trying to make a baby. I had a few early miscarriages and chemical pregnancies in the early 2000's, a 9 week loss in 2006 and then finally had some success and had my kids. I had another loss after Thomas, then a chemical, and then I was unexpectedly pregnant at the end of September. Another early loss, I hadn't even told my OH yet and the bleeding started.

You're right that it does seem so hard to go back to normal life. I always feel like that.

 

[lilmisscaviar]

I lost my last baby in July but I think this is a good idea to start a support thread for those currently going through this. I've had so many friends in the first trimester that it ached me to no end when I had to tell them goodbye at 12 weeks. While they all went on to the second trimester, I ended up having to come here to the miscarriage support group. The ladies here were so supportive and really helped me get over my grief, though tbh I couldn't get on BnB for the longest time after my mmc because all the pregnancy categories reminded me of the baby that I so very much wanted. It is nice to be able to get my feelings out here where other ladies out there are going through the same thing and who unfortunately understand the pain I've went through.

I found out at a 7 week ultrasound that my baby had no heartbeat and I finally passed everything when I was almost 12 weeks along. I am proud that my body tried to hold on to the baby for so long but it seemed like it was a process that would never end. I have written my story about my natural miscarriage in my old pregnancy journal if any of you would like to read it (just as a warning it is very graphic): https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/pregnancy-journals/2313947-lilmisscaviars-filling-coop-4.html

 

[mrsmax]

Thanks LouOscar.

I had a tiny bit of spotting a couple of weeks ago at 9 weeks. Sadly ultrasound showed baby was only 12mm and heart stopped beating. It is now acweek later and have a D&c tomorrow pm although just started some bleeding this morning.

I struggled with infertility and had Ivf for my first. This bfp felt such a miracle and blessing and now devastate in case I don't ever get pregnant again....

Would love a place like this to come and share and support others going through same thing.

This forum has seemed a bit quiet..

 

[c beary83]

Hope it goes ok tomorrow mrsmac xxx

 

[Sophiejash]

Hi everyone I started bleeding on 16th September, I was supposed to be 9+5 but EPU scanned me on 17th and although the there was a heartbeat baby only measured 5+5, I lost the baby later on that day. I stopped bleeding nearly two weeks ago now and feel the only thing to help me heal is to fall pregnant again as soon as I can so we're trying again before AF in the hope she wont show her ugly face.
Little bean always in my heart - gutted
Sorry for everyone's loses this is a horrible experience xx

 

[mrsmax]

Thanks for sharing your story Sophie. We will also ttc as soon as we can. D&c today so hoping can move forward after that x

 

[Alea]

Sadly another new face in this thread.

I'm Alea, I'm 22 and I live in the UK. A week and a half ago I miscarried my second child at just 6 weeks. The pregnancy was very much a shock to OH and I as we welcomed our first child, Maisie, in June of this year and our second would've been due in May 2016.

Since finding out we were set to have another baby we had been overwhelmed with emotions and it's been a difficult time since that sad day 11 days ago, but we are doing okay. Days after our loss we went on holiday which was a beautiful time and I couldn't have been more proud to show the world my amazing family. OH and I discussed our loss, what it meant and what would lie ahead for us and while at the time an 11 month gap was a scary thought, we were overjoyed at the thought of having two children close in age. While we haven't officially decided to TTC, we've said we will let nature take it's course and would welcome a baby at any time, should we be blessed with a third.

Sending lots of love to you all

 

[mrsmax]

Sorry to hear that Alea.

I has my D&c yesterday and feeling pretty good today. Looking forward to moving on and trying again. I didn't cry once yesterday which I am surprised about but pleased.

How is everyone doing?

 

[Sophiejash]

Hi Alea, welcome to the group. Although the gap wasn't as close together as you, I've just lost my second child too.
Today I'm feeling abit low, we've started trying again as you all know and I hate not knowing what my cycle is doing. I think I've ovulated over the past week as I've had a lot of CM but who knows. I hate not being in control and really want a BFP now. I'm not good at this waiting rubbish x

 

[mrsmax]

Yeah the waiting and not knowing is the worst!!!

 

[c beary83]

Hey mrsmax, glad your d&c went ok.

I agree the waiting is awful. I'm still spotting two and a half weeks on and no sign of ovulation

I just want to get this bit done and move onto the next cycle

 

[Rinaz]

I'll join you ladies. I miscarried naturally on Sept 29th and I'm still waiting for it to complete. I should have been 11 weeks but baby never developed past 6 or 7 weeks. I just want this nightmare to be over.

 

[Sophiejash]

Welcome Rinaz, I'm so sorry for your loss. It took 9 days after I lost the sac for the bleeding to come to a holt with me. Everyone's different but hopefully it won't be long. It's so gutting losing a child when you're so close to 12 weeks and think your pretty much through the worrying stage. I was supposed to be 10 weeks when I lost mine (17th sept) and was thinking 'yes I'm nearly through and pretty much got away with the morning sickness'. Well i think morning sickness is a really good sign and although I hate it I'm really hoping I get it next time.
It does feel abit never ending, I think even now it's stopped I'm struggling with where my body is in relation to ovulation etc as I really want to fall pregnant again as soon as I can. I think until I get AF (if she comes) I'm going to feel completely out of this world. Can't seem to concentrate on anything. It's so difficult X

 

[Rinaz]

Thank you Sophiejash. I'm sorry for your loss as well.
I had some bleeding early on so I had multiple trips to the doctor but it still took 4 weeks to confirm I was going to miscarry. But I was like you, thinking I was getting closer to 2nd trimester so maybe everything would be okay. I didn't have anymore bleeding and still felt pregnant. I also agree about the morning sickness. It's weird to hope for something that's going to make you miserable.
I hope your body regulates quickly so you can get another BFP soon. I think I'm going to wait 2 cycles just to be sure my body is really ready this time. I know I'm going to be a nervous wreck!

 

[CatchBabyDust]

Hello! First of, sorry for everyones losses..

I've written so many posts in the past few days.. but i can now officially post on this one and i can not believe i am back on this forum 3 years later! I thought I would not have another miscarriage after a healthy pregnancy! I don't know why!

So, i wasnt officially ttc but somehow we ended up pregnant.. I was very overwhelmed and shocked!! I did not feel pregnant at all or get any of the symptoms.. Anywho, yesterday (sadly on my birthday) I started bleeding.. I went to er as i was very concerned.. The bleeding was more of spotting but kinda seemed like a first day of period.. (only 5w5d btw, so if i hadn't tested i would've thought it was just a very late period).. I havent cramped since i had my first child (about two years and 4 months ago).. In the er they did some blood tests and told me that my Hcg is low.. and should take test in two days..

I didnt like the dr in the er as i was telling her i'm bleeding but she seemed careless.. So today, i went to another dr and told her everything (as the bleeding increased) she asked for more blood work and hcg have increased slightly in 13 hours since my last test but she said the only way to know if it's increasing properly is in 48 hours.. I called her in the afternoon telling her that now i am having cramps and bleeding more and passed small clots.. She asked me to rest and let my body work it's ways and come in tomorrow unless i'm bleeding too much and clotting then should go to ER rightaway..

I am fine now.. Just bleeding and minor clots like a heavy period! My first miscarriage was much worse cuz i was much farther along.. I am just concerned about infections.. ANyone knows when to go on the antibiotics? Well, the dr told me not to start them till she confirms miscarriage but i feel i'm done

I just don't want any complications in the future.. I have cried quite few times yesterday..but today i went in with a strong heart.. I think it helped that i havent had any scans so i wasnt as attached as i was with my first bean

We probably won't ttc soon! But this experience actually had me wanting to get pregnant again soon

Hopefully soon we will have our healthy pregnancies that we wish for and healthy babies..

xox

 

[mrsmax]

Sorry for your loss catch. I had mc at 9.5 weeks and not put in antibiotics. Onlky given if sign of infection. I would guess as yours was but earlier you probably would be fine without them but if worried could you call your doctor?

I had my first really bad day post D&c today. Lots of crying and sadness. First day vacknat the office and I just don't feel ready!!!

 

[Deb_baby]

Hi, i'm Deborah, 25.
Im a newbie to this thread. Had a miscarriage nearly 7 years ago and one live birth since 6 1/2 years ago. Was just over 8 weeks along and started m/c over the last week. not been given anything for the pain this time and struggling, nothing seems to be helping that im taking and i just feel nauseas all the time now.

Sorry for your loss x