share your positive stories and advice

[laura109]

I love hearing how everyone copes etc. getting tips and advice and listening is also good. although its good to know the bad, its quite easy to hear horror stories about pain and tearing, after effects etc and put yourself into a panic. we all know labour is painful and some tear, or vomit, bad sides effects of drugs etc. horrible labours in general. When we hear it, it sticks...

sooo I was thinking how good would it be if people can share only positive stories and things to help first time mums in this post. maybe share stories to do with...

How you coped with contractions
methods you used during labour
pain relief you found fantastic
anything you found helped in labour

just general stories about anything.

I know im researching a lot at the moment as I want to prepare myself so I don't panic in labour as its my first. any tips anyone feels can help first time mums would be great.

and remember keep it positive for this post xxx

 

[mara16jade]

I'll start!

My water broke after dtd at 2:45am blush, and I was in total denial that my they broke. LOL So after finally calling L&D and my dh running around like a mad man, I check into the hospital around 6am. By that point I was getting contractions every 4-5 minutes and they were starting to be like period cramps. I was checked close to 7am at and I was 2cm. Then at 9:30am I was withering in pain from contractions and I was checked and was a stretching 6 and almost a 7! I got the epidural which was a TOTAL walk in the park (and this is coming from a classified needlephobic). The IV was a billion times worse, but still not too awful.

Took all of like 5 minutes for pure bliss to set in and so I relaxed, chatted with family, took a nap. I got to 10cm rather quickly, but I was still not at a -1 or -2 station and I think I was hanging around at 90% effaced for a bit. So since baby was happy, I was good, they just let me labor on and checked on me from time-to-time. Around dinner time I was almost good to go, but baby was so not interested arching his head under my pelvic bone and that's what they were waiting for. So they let me labor on. Around 8pm they had me start to do practice pushes hoping that would entice LO to dip his head under my bone...nope. So we just decided I'd push and I'd have to get him under my bone. So we did side laying, squatting with a birthing bar, on my back (back was my favorite position). And he was born at 11:30pm kicking and screaming and latched right away while staring at me.

I barely tore. It was an internal tear so I got a few stitches which obviously I didn't feel since I had the epidural. And then I was moved to recovery. I was up going to the bathroom about 2 hours later and was waiting for the pain to hit. Nope. The only pain I got was after pains from nursing, and I'll admit, those hurt. So they gave me some non-narcotic pain meds for it. And then I had some pretty bad hemorrhoids. But I had those going into labor, so I kind of figured they'd get worse. And they did. Those were what really hurt and bothered me....nothing else.

Advice:
Take the pain meds if you feel you need to. Don't fear that you're weak or whatever other negative thoughts cross your mind. Modern medicine is there to help you. You're not suppose to suffer, so use what helps you to cope with the pain.

For after care:
Witch hazel pads for either tears or hemorrhoids = amazing.

Drink lots of water to dilute your urine, and when you do pee, lean alllllll the way forward so that it dribbles as far from any potential tears that usually occur on your perineum.

If you have pain, keep up with your pain meds. I took 600mg of ibuprophen every 4-6 hours mainly because of my hemorrhoids.

Enlist any willing family members to come by when you're ready to help make meals or simply hold the baby so you can shower/nap/etc.

If you're BF'ing - EAT EAT EAT. Oh, and DRINK DRINK DRINK (water). Both will help get your supply up. Pretty much continue this for as long as you BF. No dieting.

If you're having issues with latching. And we had some horrendous issues. Try a nipple shield. Every nurse, lactation consultant and doctor told me not to...I didn't need it. My mom said why not, give it a try. So after almost a month of baby not gaining well and taking 45 minutes to get him just to latch (and heaven forbid he loses his latch before he's done eating), I got a nipple shield and the rest was history. Seriously. He and I both learned how to BF and so we used the nipple shield for a few weeks, and then when I was horribly engorged and he couldn't get his tiny mouth to latch. And here we are 6 months later - both BF'ing pros. I just have to get it in his general direction. LOL

And most of all. Listen to your heart, and not so much what others tell you. If you want to hold your newborn baby 24/7, go for it! You can't spoil them at that age. Against CIO? Then don't do it! If you want every single person to wash their hands or use hand sanitizer - make them. This is your bundle of joy.

Hope you have a great delivery and everything goes the way you want.

Oops, wrote a novel.

Oh yeah, and Lansinoh lanolin ointment for sore nips = amazing!!

 

[JessesGirl29]

I researched a lot about birth, decided a couple things and made a plan but in my mind I was open to anything happening because I've seen some women shame themselves that they didn't get the birth they wanted. Have goals and methods but don't beat yourself up.

I was really proud of myself and it was tough (not impossible) and my plans all worked out.

1/I wanted a natural birth. I decided for a hospital midwife birth. I knew first time births usually took a long time so I was determined to naturally labour at home as long as I could before heading to the hospital to avoid pressure to use pain medicine and be in my comfortable place for as long as possible to help labour progress comfortably. I was open to staying home and having midwife in if that's what I wanted in the moment but was pretty sure I would want to go to the hospital.
I was totally right, I labored until I thought I had good progress and midwife came at midnight and I was only 3-4cms. So disappointed but then I could continue at home instead of at a hospital. I only made it until 4:30 before I made OH phone midwife to say we were meeting her and I wanted an epidural I was a glorious 6cms when we got there and it helped.

2/ I wanted to use water
I actually chose a hospital in part because I wanted water involved and don't have a good tub at home at all, as soon as I got to the hospital I got in to the bath and since I was having back labour my OH blasted hot water my back during contractions with the detachable shower head. Midwife suggested it and honestly it got me through. Listen to your birth team and be open to their suggestions.

3/ Go in to zone if you need to, speak your fears if you have them.
I was going to have my best friend in but in my gut I knew I wanted just my partner and me. Midwife hung back a lot which was awesome and I got to the point where I hand motioned to OH when I had a contraction and he blasted the water and then stopped when I put my hand down. I went on for hours and when I couldn't I asked for gas and it was amazing. With him and I and midwife popping in and out to check baby I made it to fully dilated.

4/ Pushing sucks
It did for me. Beware of stories of women being relieved to finally push. They all lie no maybe they don't, it was horrible for me. I freaked out and it was okay. The two midwives and my partner helped me through. You may freak out, don't judge yourself. It gets scary at times and it's okay.

None of it will matter when you are holding your baby, it's all worth it and you won't care

 

[JessesGirl29]

In the giant hospital tub in the zone for hours.

 

[horseybird]

Hi, good idea for a thread.

I have had 2 girls, 2 years and 6 days old. It's hard to comment as think depends on the person.

For me the following helped:
Distraction during early contractions, reading.

Rocking on all fours using breathing techniques

Standing and holding onto something and swaying

Don't have a set labour plan, things can change quickly. Just know your preferences.

Gas and air

Holding onto something corner of the bed when your getting near to pushing.

Ps it wasn't clear to me when I needed to push, it just felt sort of numb and fuzzy.

Good luck x

 

[laura109]

Thank you. I have already got tips from the replies. Some great tips xx

 

[kaths101]

Both my boys very similar births and both quick and trouble free

Boy 1, first birth and first pain hit at 1am, went downstairs until about 4:30am and the contractions ramped up and then went and woke OH. I actually wanted to just be on my own and pace downstairs. We drove to the hospital about 7am was gutted to hear I was only 2/3 cm as I was in considerable pain at this point, started panicking that I couldn't do it! My body started to push by itself.. Had a few puffs of gas and air
Baby arrived at 9:57am!!

Second baby very similar but first pain was at 5am and he was born at 11:08am in the water, he was 10lb 11oz so a big boy and again only gas and air needed.

My biggest tip is to stay upright, to walk, to rock and sway your hips. I kind of got into a rhythm with each contraction! I just could not imagine having that pain laying on my back on a bed! At least if you can rock you can get through, I used to count in my head too with each contraction and was completely silent throughout. I used a TENS for my first..not sure if it did much but it did keep me occupied by pressing the buttons and took my mind off the pain a little
Don't worry about big baby's..I had a 7lb 8 and a nearly 11lber and they both felt the same!
Drink lots, I had a mixture of lucozade and water.
Teach your OH some hand signals before you go in every time I needed him to pass the gas and air I slapped the side of the pool! If I needed a drink I stuck my tongue out! Sounds so silly but I totally lost the ability to talk..I don't think I said one word through either of my births!!
Enjoy it!! No fear, no bad thought..Honestly go in with a clear head, you've got a job to do and you have to do it. i look back on both of my births with such joy, there's is not one thing I look back on and say ooh that was bad. I actually did enjoy them so much and the gift at the end is just the best in the world

 

[laura109]

Thanks for sharing ill remember the hips and to keep moving xx

 

[BunnyN]

It surprised me that I actually loved labour and I'm looking forward to it this time. Pushing was my favourite part. I had a lovely home birth experience. Of course it was painful but it I also had a huge rush of adrenaline etc going on. Staying active and moving around in the way that felt right at the moment is what helped me cope with the pain. Heat packs on my back helped too. I was sick several times but it wasn't actually that bad, I didn't feel that sick, it was just like my body wanted rid of anything to digest. The only thing I'd wish for differently this time would be a slightly shorter labour, last time was 38hrs total and it was sarting to get hard to cope with being exausted. Thankfully I did manage a few brief naps between contractions which helped. I had a small tear but wasn't really even sore after and my lady parts recovered quickly.

 

[Eleanor ace]

Aw, nice idea for a thread . I loved giving birth the first time, I was on a high for a week and already desperate to do it all again an hour after DS was born . It's such a rush!

How you coped with contractions:
I found being active and moving around to find the most comfortable position really helped. Some positions I thought would be comfy weren't and others that I hadn't considered (leaning over a bed with one leg up ) really felt right. Positions which felt good in my 1st labour didn't with my 2nd. So yeah, moving around was key for me.

methods you used during labour:
Breathing slowly helped me- with my 1st I got a bit panicked at on point and started breathing faster, it made the pain significantly worse. When my MW guided me to regulate my breathing it eased the pain a lot.

pain relief you found fantastic:
Water! I wanted a water birth with my 1st but couldn't have one. I had one with my 2nd and it was bliss when I got in. Also gas and air- man I love that stuff!

anything you found helped in labour
Having people (MW, DH) be calm and supportive, a calm atmosphere (low noise, no bright lights) and music (I found it helpful to be able to focus on a song wen contractions hit)

just general stories about anything:
I think going in with a basic plan but being open minded is good. With my 1st I hoped for a water birth and to be active, but I ended up on my back from 7cm as DS needed to be constantly monitored and they couldn't get a proper reading in any other position. I was a little sad I didn't get a water birth but because I'd gone into it prepared for what might be I was able to just go with it.
Don't listen to horror stories! Obviously you know that birth doesn't always go to plan and you might find it hard, but try not to let yourself get scared by other peoples experiences. My 1st was back to back, I knew he was going to be big for my frame and I was induced. I had people trying to tell me about their friend who had the same and had an awful time, was screaming for an epidural at 1cm, blah blah. Not helpful! I had an awesome experience and I put a lot of that down to being positive and empowering myself (lots of telling myself I could do it etc).