Should I make my FOB/OH pay child support?

[amygwen]

Heyyyyyyyy ladies

Okay, so basically I'm 20 years old & so is my FOB/OH. We're both full-time students and I work full-time as well. I'm having a really hard time with my FOB because I've been wanting him to get a job since we found out about the pregnancy in October 2009. And even though I know he's tried I don't think he's been trying hard enough and it's really really frustrating especially for me because I'm due in a month & I'm still working and plan to work up until I can't anymore! And he's not... it's so stupid. It should be the other way around!!!!

Anyways, I've mentioned if he doesn't get a job that I will get him to pay child support. And, he's told me that if I do that then he will break up with me. Realistically I think he's just saying that to be a dick. But, here in the US if you don't pay child support then he can go to jail. I mean, it's not my fault he hasn't gotten a job, but I don't think that I can pay for this baby all by myself on my income (and even though my family is very supportive it isn't their baby it's his!) He keeps saying "I'll have a job by the time the baby is here" and, it hasn't happened and I'm sick of waiting around.

If you were in my situation would you make him pay child support even though there would be a chance he could go to jail if he didn't get a job?

Sooooooooo lame!

Thanks!!

 

[Desi's_lost]

hm..does he get any sort of unemployment? because what the state takes is based on his income

 

[amygwen]

hm..does he get any sort of unemployment? because what the state takes is based on his income

Noooo! he doesn't get any unemployment. I wish he could, I've tried looking into everything unfortunately. But since he's only had one job in his life that he got FIRED from then he's automatically not eligible. it sucks.

 

[Desi's_lost]

before you chance hurting the relationship (if you even want it), you should find out if he is even eligible to pay child support. i dont know how it works if they dont have any income. maybe if he has savings they could take from that? honestly i dont know enough to say for certain though.

 

[Croc-O-Dile]

Personally, I would. I planned to have FOB pay child support even when we were still together because I couldn't trust him to actually pay for anything on his own without being forced to. Plus, if things went sour (in my case, they did) and he took off I'd never see another penny from him. kwim? (Although if you trust him to pay and all that, then you probably wouldn't need to take it to court.)

I know in New Jersey & Alabama (Because both of my dads pay C/S but each out of two different states) if a man (or woman) is order to pay child support and they don't have a job, then they need to go down to the one-stop career center in their area and get a job before it's due. Or they have to come up with the money some other (legal ) way.

I don't know what state you're out of, therefore I can't really give you any solid advice. But has he tried going down to the Temp-center/one-stop career? It's like an office that takes your information and then finds a job for you that you're qualified for. They usually set you up with an interview and all that as well.

Good luck xxx

 

[sleepinbeauty]

I'm a huge supporter of "You play, you pay." If he can be trusted it shouldn't be an issue but if he doesn't pay I'd run down to the government offices ASAP!

Best of luck!

 

[QuintinsMommy]

I'm a huge supporter of "You play, you pay." If he can be trusted it shouldn't be an issue but if he doesn't pay I'd run down to the government offices ASAP!

Best of luck!

I like that!

when I read this post's title all I could say was "yes"
here in canada, even if FOB doesn't have money now, he will always owe Quintin money.

I'm trying to start to take my FOB to court.

 

[amygwen]

Personally, I would. I planned to have FOB pay child support even when we were still together because I couldn't trust him to actually pay for anything on his own without being forced to. Plus, if things went sour (in my case, they did) and he took off I'd never see another penny from him. kwim? (Although if you trust him to pay and all that, then you probably wouldn't need to take it to court.)

I know in New Jersey & Alabama (Because both of my dads pay C/S but each out of two different states) if a man (or woman) is order to pay child support and they don't have a job, then they need to go down to the one-stop career center in their area and get a job before it's due. Or they have to come up with the money some other (legal ) way.

I don't know what state you're out of, therefore I can't really give you any solid advice. But has he tried going down to the Temp-center/one-stop career? It's like an office that takes your information and then finds a job for you that you're qualified for. They usually set you up with an interview and all that as well.

Good luck xxx

Thanks for your advice

I'm hoping that he would pay without me forcing him but it's taken him so long to get a job, I don't want him to think I'll do it all by myself and without his help, you know? So it's kind of like hard to feel like I can trust him to give me money without being forced to! I'm totally going to look into that temp-center thing you talked about. That's a really good idea, I haven't looked too much into child support but I guess I really should start thinking more about it before the LO arrives! Thanks again!

 

[amygwen]

I'm a huge supporter of "You play, you pay." If he can be trusted it shouldn't be an issue but if he doesn't pay I'd run down to the government offices ASAP!

Best of luck!

Thank you! I like that

Quote:
Originally Posted by sleepinbeauty View Post
I'm a huge supporter of "You play, you pay." If he can be trusted it shouldn't be an issue but if he doesn't pay I'd run down to the government offices ASAP!

Best of luck!
I like that!

when I read this post's title all I could say was "yes"
here in canada, even if FOB doesn't have money now, he will always owe Quintin money.

I'm trying to start to take my FOB to court.

Thanks for your advice. Good luck with taking your FOB to court! I hope everything turns out how you want it to!

 

[sleepinbeauty]

lol I've been chanting that to ladies on here for a while now. I glad you guys like it. hahaha I should make bumper stickers or something...

 

[aidensxmomma]

FYI if he doesn't have a job they will make him look for a job. He'll have to fill out 10 (give or take) applications a week to fulfill his requirements so he doesn't get into legal trouble. And the child support will keep accumulating and he'll just have to pay it all once he gets a job.

If you two are living together, though, I don't think he will have to pay.

Good luck, hun.

 

[amygwen]

FYI if he doesn't have a job they will make him look for a job. He'll have to fill out 10 (give or take) applications a week to fulfill his requirements so he doesn't get into legal trouble. And the child support will keep accumulating and he'll just have to pay it all once he gets a job.

If you two are living together, though, I don't think he will have to pay.

Good luck, hun.

Thank you that's great to know!
I didn't know that he would HAVE to look for a job.
We don't live together! We both live with our parents still which is fiiiiiiine with me!

Thanks again!