Should I tell my boss?

[Maurie]

I believe that this in one form or another was already on here at one point. I couldn't find it so I thought I would ask again.

I am considering telling my bosses at work we are going through all the infertility treatment and such. Not sure I should though. I am a little conflicted. What do you think?

I Work from home. I am a teacher at a virtual school. Therefore they know nothing about all the appointments for office visits and tests.

Last month was very difficult for me with all of the infertility stress. I had my HSG in October and they found nothing so I was referred to the FS in the office. That sent me into serious stress mode. She ordered more tests and in the process I triggered one of my complex migraines. (these migraines are fierce! They cause blind spots, numbness in limbs.. Its awful!!)

This seriously affected my job. My monthly eval was not so hot. This really put me down. I just wanted to cry to my boss and tell her all about it. I went and did a little shopping therapy lol

DH thinks its too personal and I shouldn't tell her. However I work with 500 ladies and many MANY are pregnant. My co-teacher even had a baby the second week of November and I had to take over her responsibilities until they got a sub in.

I do not want to use infertility as an excuse but it clearly having effects on my job performance.

Would you tell?

 

[terces]

If it is having an effect on your job, then it might be a good idea to let her know. Especially since she is a women, she may be understanding. I see your point of not wanting to use it as an excuse. Telling her also depends on her personality. I've had bosses that wouldn't understand at all and would see me as being lazy if I told them something like that (not saying you are lazy. I know what all this can do to your body), but then I had bosses that would be understanding and try to help me out. I hope you come to a decision that you are comfortable with. I would tell my current boss, but we are close and talk a lot to each other. Hope you get that BFP VERY soon!

 

[Dazed]

If you are comfortable with your boss, the decision is yours. I have thought about telling mine since she has had infertility issues and went through IVF for her son, but since we aren't that close, I figure its none of her business at this point since I can schedule things to where they don't effect my performance at work. If the appointments make you feel like you are being ineffective, maybe you should tell them so that they understand.

 

[cooch]

I said I was having fertility treatment and because of it needed a blood test once a month. I kinda had to as I would have felt as though I was taking the piss other wise, and they might have been suspicious with why I needed time for appointments.

Its up to you, sometimes it can relieve a bit of stress for someone you work with/for knows. Also if you are on medication it can increase stress levels and behaviour so for this fact I think its a pretty good idea. But, it is up to you, do what you are comfortable with xx

 

[Maurie]

Thank you Ladies,
I read your responses and decided to go ahead an tell my direct supervisor.
Turns out she had gone through it, success and is now experiencing secondary infertility. We were on the phone crying with each other. It was so helpful.
She offered to be a source of support when I need it.

 

[Dazed]

Thats awsome! Good luck hun and I'm glad you have personal support from someone.