Sil is pregnant

[~curiosity~]

Hello all, just needed people to talk to. I am going through my second miscarriage and I thought I was coping fine, so much better than the last. My first was 6 years ago, a missed miscarriage. At my 12 week scan they found my baby - but he or she had sadly died at 9 weeks. I honestly think between then and now I've not really got over it but the second pregnancy felt like a second chance. Due to a bit of spotting we booked an early scan at 7 weeks 5 days. We were sent straight to hospital as they thought it was ectopic, it turned out it wasn't but only measuring 5 weeks, from a scan 2 days later we were told sac had grown but could only see fibres, no embryo. For the next 2 weeks waiting for a scan we accepted it was over and I was ready just to miscarry so we can TTC again. I was induced and miscarried on Saturday and it went fairly smoothly at home. We're moving so I've kept busy and felt pretty much OK. So...today we get a video call from my brother-in-law and sister-in-law. They're pregnant with their second child. They got worried after what happened to us so they had a scan today at 7 weeks 3 days. More or less the same time we found out we'd lost it. I'm floored my husband who has been so strong is in tears and there's nothing I can do as I feel exactly the same, I can't stop crying. Their due date is a month after ours too. Sorry for the essay just wondering if there is anyone else feeling the same.

 

[Curlymikes]

It's really horrible. So sorry. I lost a baby at around 8 weeks. Then had a mmc while my sil was pregnant too. She was 16 unmarried and got a happy healthy boy and I lost my much desired baby. She was exactly a month farther along than I was and every milestone that she passed was so hard. I fought not to be jealous and resentful. It was a hard sad time. I did get pregnant again and now have twins, but I still miss the two babies I lost. Take time, take care of yourself. It will get better. Hopefully you will get your rainbow soon!

 

[~curiosity~]

Thank you Hun, congratulations on your twins! I really hope the next one is successful but terrified the same thing will happen again. Thank you for helping me not feel so alone xxx

 

[Curlymikes]

Oh yeah it so scary being pregnant with the twins. I kept thinking I would go to the ultrasound and there would be no heartbeat. i feel like the joy of pregnancy is stolen from those of us who have lost babies, there is just so much anxiety. I wish you all the best and if you would ever like to talk more just send me a pm. Oh and I'm not sure if it's what did it for me but I took a baby aspirin every day with my successful pregnancy, not sure if that is what made the difference but maybe you could ask your OB about it. I will be taking it if I ever get pregnant again. Hope you have a good day and try to do something you enjoy to take your mind off the loss. Take care.

 

[peskipiksee]

Perfectly understand but it's not my SIL, it's one of my closest friends. She's posted stuff on FB and I see it and I just want to smack her while screaming "That should be me!". I'm just waiting on a follow up with my doctor to tell him I want a D&C. I don't want to wait weeks for a natural m/c. I want it gone. I'm nearly at what should have been 8 weeks. So you're definitely not alone.

Feel free to PM me any time. I'm almost in the same boat.

 

[lesondemavie]

Hey curio, I'm so sorry you are going through this. My SIL was about 1.5 months ahead in her pregnancy when we were expecting. About the time that we were going through our Mmc she was announcing the gender. A month later 2 friends hit the second tri and announced they were expecting. I had pictured what we would do and what that would be like. When I saw the announcements, I literally threw my phone. I thankfully had the gift of distance, but seeing her in June was incredibly hard. Thankfully it helped me work through those feelings. She had her baby a few weeks ago, and it was far easier to hear the news than I thought it would be. I'm coming up on my EDD and those friends will be having their babies then. I'm thinking that might be harder, but we'll see. This grieving process has many twists and turns. You said you never really got over the Mmc before, and I get that. I'll never get over it, but I will learn to live with the dark cloud, and maybe one day I'll have that baby to let some sun on in. I hope they are sensitive to your situation, and give you both some space and time

 

[~curiosity~]

Thank you all so much, I am so sorry we're all in this situation it really sucks I am here if any of you need to talk about it, miscarriage is such a lonely journey.

Les I am sorry that it is close to would be due date, I know how hard that is sending lots of love and hope rainbow baby appears very very soon xxx

I am feeling a bit better today as we've been moving, just trying to be hopeful for the future as it's the only way we're keeping going at the moment. Lots of love ladies xxx