Single teen mums? Need some reassurance..

Discussion in 'Teen Pregnancy' started by NewToThis_x, Apr 23, 2009.

  1. NewToThis_x

    NewToThis_x Well-Known Member

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    Hey agen everyone..
    Well im feeling really down atm 'cause the boyfriend really wants me to have an abortion and i reaaally don't want to have one..im not thinking of leaving him but i don't know anymore if he'll stick by me if im honest..
    Just wondered if any of you are single mums or mums to be and how u cope?
    Thanks x
     
  2. AppleBlossom

    AppleBlossom Guest

    I am a single mum, I'm 19 and we are better off on our own. I am entitled to a lot of different benefits and although it's not ideal it makes things so much easier :hugs:
     
  3. NewToThis_x

    NewToThis_x Well-Known Member

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    just feeling so down..:( got him going on every day..like he's blaming me for getting pregnant..i kept thinking he'd come round but im not so sure..just don't know how il get through this by myself!
     
  4. AppleBlossom

    AppleBlossom Guest

    He might come round, could be the shock. My ex was happy about it all. The minute she was born he changed and in January left me to start a gay relationship which everyone but me knew about! But honestly, even if he doesn't come round, people find a way to cope. You have to when you have a baby to think about too x
     
  5. loubear19

    loubear19 Well-Known Member

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    Hey im realy sorry that your in this situation. Do what you feel is right and dont let anyone else but you influence your decision. If your man dont stick around then he quite frankly aint worth it. wish u luck hun in whatever you decide. x
     
  6. xarlenex

    xarlenex Well-Known Member

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    I'm a single mummy. I'm 19, although Kyle does see his dad. Its difficult, but very do-able, especially if you have family to help you. You can do it, you'll grow stronger as your baby grows inside you and you'll know you can do it for him/her :hugs: xx
     
  7. NewToThis_x

    NewToThis_x Well-Known Member

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    Thanks everyone ... if it comes to it il just have to get on with it .. like you say bexy_22 il have the baby to think about soo just have too. I havn't told my mum 'bout the pregnancy yet but im sure once she's over the shock she'll be supportive so iv got her not totally alone.
     
  8. perdiepirate

    perdiepirate Active Member

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    1 of my best mates was brought up by a single mum and my other friend is a single mum.
    in both cases they're wonderful and strong people - not to mention fantastic mothers!
    and theres a lot of support for new, young and single mothers :).
    if he decides he doesn't want to stand by you then he's not worth your time angel - you're better than that :) and like you said i'm sure your mum will also come round.
    and remeber we're all always here to support and talk you through every step
    you're not alone

    x lots of love x
     
  9. Jade--x

    Jade--x Guest

    Im sorry to hear about your situation. I know what its like to be in the same situation. When I found out I was pregnant and I told my then boyfriend he tried to force me into an abortion but he was so insensitive about it! I said I couldn't go through with it and he was like yeah you can its easy and said some really horrible upsetting things about abortion that I won't repeat because they'll just upset people. And then he rang up saying he was infertile :| And he was just not nice to be honest. So we ended up splitting up.
    Im not a single mum but Im not with the biological father Im with someone so much better, it takes someone really special to take on someone elses child. But I am managing absolutely great without my sons bio father, and even if I didnt have the guy I do know I wud be doing absolutely great!
    But I have my parents there for support and they're great, without them I dunno what Id do so it depends really hun.
    But don't base your decision on keeping you LO on whether or not he will stick around.
    You'll find a way through it..were girls we always do :)
    x
     
  10. babynewbie

    babynewbie Well-Known Member

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    Hi, when i first told my boyfriend he really didnt want a baby, he wanted an abortion and that was that.
    After about 2 weeks of trying to bring him round nothing changed, i asked him to speak to someone he trusted about it and he spoke to friend at work.
    He totally changed his mind, he pointed out that loads of people react the same at first, (worried about money, coping, etc...) but when the babys here it will all be worth it.
    Now hes as excited as i am :)

    But if this doesnt happen for you, i was brought up by my mum on her own and she did a fab job.

    Bit long sorry, but hope everything goes ok :hug:
     
  11. scottishgal89

    scottishgal89 Well-Known Member

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    hey.
    im in exactly the same position.
    he was being okay about it and was actually quite excited for a few weeks.
    but then he told his mum yesterday and she thinks i should have aborted too.
    which im disgusted about really, shes so unsupportive and shes actually a really nice person. but after that he flew off the handle and changed his mind bk, last two days have been hell.
    dont think we're going to have a future. its sad really but we're probably better off.
    my mums a single mum and i was happier when my dad left and she has 3 of us!
    good luck with everything. dont feel alone tho, im sure thers a lot of people in our position.
    but at the end of the day its them who are going to miss out cuz we are going to have a gorgeous little baby who we are going to love unconditionally.
    xxx
     
  12. Jade--x

    Jade--x Guest

    I was happy when I left my babys father, the only problem with it is when they come back and want to be part of the babys life and they just really want to use the baby as a trophy. My ex does anyway. And hurt me at the same time for leaving him.
    x
     
  13. Boothh

    Boothh Jesse, Teddy and 4 angels

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    my babies daddy was like this at first, he was completly devastated and i knew he would be, he was like this until after my first scan which he came to,
    now things are going fine and he apoligised over the weekend for the stuff he said and what he put me through so maybe your boyfriend will change his mind once he gets over himself.

    we arnt together at the moment but we get on great, but even if we didnt i know id be okay on my own, and so will you be if it comes to it, you will know whats best for your baby and find a way to cope, so dont worry too much because everything will work out in the end, his loss if he carries on acting like an idiot, xxxx
     
  14. nikky0907

    nikky0907 Well-Known Member

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    I'm 19 and I'm a single mom. Sometimes it is easier to go at it on your own than in an unhappy relationship. Believe it or not there is nothing more lonely than being with someone you're not happy with, not even single motherhood.

    :hugs:
     
  15. Jade--x

    Jade--x Guest

    Aww I agree with nikki0907. Its not nice being in a relationship when you're unhappy. Iv just split with my OH so im now a single mum and to be honest it doesn't feel any different or harder, just a little more upset
    x
     

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