So confused...

[maybebaby]

I had a very upsetting phone call with my OH tonight. He was telling me how he told our friends about me being pg, which is fine, and then went on how scared he is and can't "wrap his head around it". I understand that, but he seems to always forget that I am scared too. We've had a rocky relationship in the beginning, and we were doing really well for the past 8 months or so and then I found out I was pg. So even though I wanted a baby, I didn't want one until we secured our relationship. He thinks that just because I know I want kids means that I am a-ok with this pregnancy. I am terrified, that I'll end up alone raising the baby by myself, and we won't be together anymore. I do really love him and I know he loves me but I wish he would stop just worrying about himself and worry a little about how I am feeling too. I told him that if he can't handle it, he should just go now. I feel like my heart is breaking....

 

[Kellz]

hun don't push him away.
Have you actually told him that you are scared too?
Men don't seem to have the instinct to understand how someone else maybe feeling - they need to be told directly but calmly.

Keep the lines of communication open.
big hugs

 

[nikky0907]

men think that all women are meant to be mothers and we are all happy and feeling great.They don't understand that we get scared and confused too.But you should tell him that and you guys can help each other through this...I'm gonna be a single mother and I'm terrified of it and I think it's normal.
You guys can work this out if you just share your worries with each other...

 

[Gems]

Hi hun, you need to talk to each other, tell him how you feel and tell him your worried and scared too . Like Kellz said dont push him away, men are useless at comunication and they certainly cant read our minds. You will feel so much better once you have both opened up to each other.
I really hope you get things sorted, big hugs xxxxx

 

[Mervs Mum]

My hubby told me about a week ago he was worried and nervous and I was 'OMG its a bit late for that isn't it!!' It's a man thing. Dont worry babe - its early days - you both need to get used to it!

x

 

[Vickie]

Sit down and have a good talk with him. All I heard from my DH the first 13 weeks of pregnancy was how worried he was, how were we going to afford this, etc. Ever since than first scan though (and since I've started showing) he's become very excited about the pregnancy. He talks to the baby now and puts his hands on my stomach. I think it just takes men longer to come around to the idea of being a father.

 

[maybebaby]

I have told him how scared I am and he just doesn't seem to understand. He just keeps talking about how he feels, and how he is freaking out and can't "get his head around this". I just don't know what to do.

 

[Samantha675]

Well at least he is talking to you about how he is feeling, I htink that is good. A lot of men just keep their mouths shut. Maybe just tell him, 'I know, I am just as scared about this, but if we support each other, we can do this'. Also, no matter how 'set' you are in life or your relationship, bringing a baby into the world is a really scary thing.

 

[maybebaby]

Yeah, I am glad he is talking to me about how he feels, but he sometimes forgets he is not the only one involved. When we first found out, he was like, don't worry baby we'll get through this, and now, he's freaking out. I dunno. I told him I would give him time to sort himself out.