So undecided about having a 2nd,7 year age gap

[pamg]

I'm feeling so undecided about having a 2nd. I had a really tough labour ending with a c-section with my daughter which has really scared me from having another & for years I have said I wasn't gna have another,although I have kept everything (buggy,cot,clothes etc) just incase!
Last summer I started feeling really broody & felt like I really wanted to have another but we had a long haul holiday booked so we planned on starting after that but the closer I got to when we are gna start trying I started to change my mind, I think I'm still feeling really scared about giving birth also & after my holiday which was to visit my brother in Miami I want to start saving to go there again & not sure we would have the same opportunities to do that having another & also with my daughter getting more & more independent now everything is easier!
I know she would like a brother or sister but doesn't seem bothered though,I guess being an only child for so long she's used to it.
My mums put me off also having another saying she thinks the age gap will be too big!
Just wondered if anyone else is in this position? Sometimes I just feel happy deciding not to then I just feel like I really want another!!
I feel if we don't try this year than the age gap is just gna get too big..

 

[Huggles]

I'm in a similar situation. We tried for a second when my son was about 2, but didn't conceive and after 2 years of unsuccessful trying we called it quits as it was seriously messing with my head. We sold all our baby stuff and made peace with having just one child. There are so many pros to only having one child and I felt reasonably happy with our decision

About a year later though I started question things again and wondering if we'd made a mistake not having a second (although we did try). But then id remind myself things are good as they are.

Then last month I landed up pg with a total surprise pregnancy. We were both totally shocked but within a day or two I was feeling really excited and happier than I've felt in years. Sadly it didn't stick and ended a week later

It has made me realise though that I really do want another. We're looking at a 6 year age gap and I honestly don't know how long I'll try, but I've given it my best shot this month (oving today as far as I can tell) and really hoping for a bfp in two weeks time. Now that the deed is done though I also have doubts. Am I crazy starting all over? Will I ruin what we have? But I just feel like I owe it to myself to at least try, even if just for a month or two.

 

[Amethyste]

My daughter will be 6 in Feb and we are trying for baby number two. It wasn't the right time before as I wanted to progress in my career and my daughter has always been very clingy. Now she is a bit bigger I feel like It might makes things easier. Having a big gap have its advantages as well 😉

 

[BabyGirl999]

There is nothing wrong with a big age gap, why does this seem to matter to people so much? I have a 7 and 5 year old who are in LOVE with their 1 year old brother, our lives would be incomplete without him and he brings so much joy to our lives! I am 39 and am very close to my 25 year old brother and his wife, and we both have a 1 year old! Age gap doesn’t matter!

You would regret not having another baby if you secretly want one, but you’ll never regret having another one.

 

[WackyMumof2]

We ended up with an unexpected 6.5 year age gap between DS2 and DS3 when I fell pregnant unplanned. I wasn't wanting a 3rd child as our second has been extremely full on and wasn't diagnosed with ADHD until he was 5.5 years of age. Then after that, we spent another YEAR being told that his medication was fine when it wasn't. I had to take matters into my own hands at 7 month to be taken seriously. I shouldn't have had to but hey. I too worried about the age gap after I got my head around the idea. But it turns out it the best thing for us. His older brothers are old enough to help with keeping the home clean and helping with their baby brother. Wouldn't have it any other way.