Stress...

[Hippiemomlife]

I know stress is bad for me as well as my baby, but I don't know what to do anymore... I'm so stressed just from everything going on in my life right now and I feel like I'm completely on my own and it's so overwhelming... my bf has had a rough year with surgeries, cancer, and now he is having additional health problems that are causing him to lose excessive weight. He is tired all the time and in and out of the hospital. This is my first pregnancy and I have been really sick and extremely tired, but my bf constantly tells me "how do you think I feel?" and it makes me feel like I am being selfish and over reacting because he has been through a lot. I can't keep the house clean, I can't focus at work, I have no motivation to do anything because I'm just so worn out and I don't want all this pressure on me the whole time. I live in a country where I don't speak the language, the culture is completely different than my own, and my parents and siblings and friends live half way across the world in Canada. I would drop everything and move to Canada in a heartbeat, but my bf is not a citizen, can't work there, and he can't live there for more than 6 months.. I know there's nothing that you all can do to help me, but I just needed to write out what's been going on because I have no one else and I don't know how I can look after myself with all of this stress...

 

[Minimin]

Hey, Didn't want to read and run. No advice per se but hugs to offer

Sounds like things are really tough without support..are there any groups, friends or such like that can get you out and talking?

 

[BabyHopes1974]

I'm sorry you are going through this. What stress reducers have you tried?

 

[Hippiemomlife]

There are some mom groups and yoga groups that are available in my area, so I'm hoping I can find someone who speaks English and who can kind of understand what I'm going through. I don't really know what types of things I can do to reduce stress... I mean I walk regularly and bike ride and swim, and for those few hours I'm at peace. But then it's Monday again and the stress is worse than before.

 

[ItsJana]

I don't know what country you are in, but it might be a good idea to try and take classes to learn the language. I was pregnant in another country with my first too and I took language classes and was able to meet people from all over the world. It was a great experience.

 

[RcdM]

Sorry you're stressed! It's hard to be pregnant and not feel like you have anyone to talk to about what you're going through, and yes your husband has been through a lot, but he shouldn't make you feel like you aren't allowed to express to him how you feel.

Don't worry about the house being clean. You're still in the early part of the second tri - things will most likely get better for you soon! I started feeling better around 17 weeks or so and got a lot of energy back and wasn't nearly as nauseous. And I know exactly what you mean about having no motivation at work. Luckily that has finally passed too and I feel like I can get a lot done now. I took advantage of that time to clean, shop, organize, do all the things I couldn't really do when I was in the first tri. Hang in there! And feel free to come on here anytime you need support or just need to vent or find women to relate to! I have very few friends so I come here a lot for those same reasons.