success stories from those who knew their LOs would struggle starting school?

[Wriggley]

Hello Ladies,

Z is due to start school in sept and im quite worried about how hes going to cope!

Hes a very independent little boy and fantastic motor skills but hes not very academic at all!

He thrives from being outdoors and taking part in sports but he does not do well being stuck in doors.

He goes to a nursery who are very big on outdoor play. He goes to nursery 3x a week - monday afternoon which is his guaranteed day for community trips - they learnt about travel so they went on a train, bus and a river boat tour , they go to the garden centre to buy plants and bring them bacvk to help plant them at nursery, they go to the farm to pick veggies then they go back and help cut them and then they are used for their tea, they go to all the museums round here, the harbour, beach, cliff climbing etc...

he then goes to nursery on the tuesday and 9 times out of 10 theirs been space on that days community trip and hes gone again.

thursday hes in all day and goes to their forest school camp in the morning comes back to the nursery for lunch then often manages to go on the afternoon community trip too!

the odd day he dont get to go on community he spends the majority of the day in the nursery garden.

so needless to say hes ALWAYS outside. This is what ive wanted for him! I believe children should be outside playing, exploring etc... he doesnt watch much telly, he dont play on tablets etc...

I spoke to his Nursery and they said they do encourage him to spend time in their 'classroom' (small room set up like a reception classroom for preparing for school) but hes just not interested and because its a child led place they dont force him to go in their (which i wouldnt want anyways)

the days hes not at nursery he does a gymnastics class once a week, swimming once a week and skateboarding lessons at the skatepark twice a week + extra sessions to just ride around up there.

He also goes to creche once a week and softplay once a week.

on saturdays we have annual passes to a local zoo and english hertiage passes.

He has gained alot of skills - he can tie his own shoe laces, he knows how to handle a camp fire/cook using it, he can safely use saws, knifes and various other tools. He went into the preschool group at gymnastics at 2 and then into the big gymnastics class at 3 (usually 5+)

My worry is hes got no interest in sitting and drawing, writing etc... for example i will try and encourage him to sit and draw. i get a reluctant agreement. I will ask him what he wants to draw and he will say 'a snail' so he draws a sqirl. literally just a swirl and ask if he can get down from the table. i will say 'well you need to draw his head' to which he replies 'no i dont its in the shell'

He does not enjoy being inside at all.

his new school sent us a letter explaining what they expect them to know by september. one of which is to be able to write and reconise his own name. if I write his name on a piece of paper he will copy it but he cant reconise it and he wouldnt be able to write it without having it in front of him to copy from.

another thing i noticed is that when we were looking round all our local schools they all use ipads/tables in some way or another. he doesnt know how to use one! are 4 year olds really expected to go into reception knowing how to use one?

i spoke to his nursery room leader and she seemed to agree that he is going to find it hard to settle into school . has anyone else got a child like mine and can share their experience? ive spoke to Z about school and he just says 'can i skateboard there?' and 'it sounds boring'

we walked past it the other day and i showed him and he just changed the subject. next week we are there for an induction so i plan on talking to his teacher about it and see exactly what they expect of him.

 

[aimee-lou]

3 months is a massive amount of time. Also in Reception the curriculum is play led. Yes, they do phonics but they're done in songs, pictures and actions. He'll be in a large group of others his age who'll all be doing the same thing so don't underestimate the influence of the classroom. He is still only little, and they don't (in my experience) expect them to know anything of any worth when they start. He probably does recognise his name, do they have a peg at nursery, or a tray with their name on? Could you write his name on his things and ask him to find it? I bought name tapes for Earl when he started and everything has them on and he can recognise them as his.

I love the fact that he's so capable, you must be very proud. I would be putting him on the waiting list for thing like Beavers and things ready for when he's at school so he can get as much exposure to outdoor pursuits as possible. You can try to encourage him with reading and writing by getting him to look at books that interest him, even if you think they look out of his range, Earl is obsessed with reference books especially about space or bugs. The schools are well used to dealing with children of all characters. You may find that he will pick it up quite quickly as the ability to read opens up so much of the world. He may take a while and then suddenly decide he wants to know. The important thing is that you continue to support him for who he is and you work with the school so they understand him and can support him appropriately. This is the same for any parent, of any child in my opinion.

 

[Wriggley]

3 months is a massive amount of time. Also in Reception the curriculum is play led. Yes, they do phonics but they're done in songs, pictures and actions. He'll be in a large group of others his age who'll all be doing the same thing so don't underestimate the influence of the classroom. He is still only little, and they don't (in my experience) expect them to know anything of any worth when they start. He probably does recognise his name, do they have a peg at nursery, or a tray with their name on? Could you write his name on his things and ask him to find it? I bought name tapes for Earl when he started and everything has them on and he can recognise them as his.

I love the fact that he's so capable, you must be very proud. I would be putting him on the waiting list for thing like Beavers and things ready for when he's at school so he can get as much exposure to outdoor pursuits as possible. You can try to encourage him with reading and writing by getting him to look at books that interest him, even if you think they look out of his range, Earl is obsessed with reference books especially about space or bugs. The schools are well used to dealing with children of all characters. You may find that he will pick it up quite quickly as the ability to read opens up so much of the world. He may take a while and then suddenly decide he wants to know. The important thing is that you continue to support him for who he is and you work with the school so they understand him and can support him appropriately. This is the same for any parent, of any child in my opinion.

thank you for your reply hun. He does have a peg with his name on at nursery! ive never thought of this ive always just put his coat and bag on it myself though saying that its on the very end so he knows which is his and each peg has got the childs photo by it.

putting his name on things is a good idea too! ive got a couple of months to prepare him. hes going to the school next month for three thursdays. these sessions are for child and parent to attend so i do plan on speaking with his new teacher too.

I am very proud of him! his skateboarding always amazes me and he looks so tiny out in the park. he only weighs 35lb so hes tiny!

couple of videos:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0t8YGYW1Fs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZmUSjq3dcE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgHkXNuDGZ4

 

[OmarsMum]

Get some wooden letters that stick on the door and write his name, play phonic songs & dance to the music. Just something basic to introduce him to phonics and the concept of letters. I think he will be fine. At school they teach through play, they don't expect them to "sit" and learn.

Omar was the opposite, he was obsessed with learning, he hated sports, climbing or running. He couldn't even kick a ball and he wasn't keen on the gym or soccer toddler classes he went to when he was 2-3 yrs.

Now he loves sports, he goes to karate, swimming, and 2 different football classes. He is obsessed with football

I wouldn't ask him to sit and draw something if he doesn't like it, I'd get him some finger paint or paint & brushes and let him create his own arts work in a fun way. Or you can print a picture of a boy on a skate board and ask him to colour it to stick it on his room's wall.

Sports magazines is also a good way to encourage reading and artistic activities. You can sit with him to cut pictures out of magazine and create a board then colour and draw related stuff around the pictures. You can read articles to him from the magazines and encourage him to talk about what you are reading.

Learning doesn't have to be boring, just work on something he likes and use it as a learning tool to do different activities.

 

[RachA]

I was under the impression that they aren't supposed to have expectations of the children knowing how to read and write their name etc. Neither of mine knew their name when they started. D picked his up very quickly. E is a different story but she has development problems so it's not surprising.
From my experience the skills they are looking for children to have are things like getting dressed/undressed themselves and using the loo.

The school my two go to is a play based reception and D spent the majority of his day in the outside area. He still managed to learn his alphabet etc.
as Aimee-Lou said, they have many different ways of teaching them phonics etc so your Z will respond to the one he gets on with the best.
Also with the tablets etc-again they aren't expected to know how to use them. It's something they pick up very quickly anyway.

 

[Cattia]

He sounds quite like my DS, who is super active but not in the least bit interested in reading and writing, or sitting still for any length of time! He is a bit more into drawing than he used to be, but he can't hold a pencil properly or write anything. He also doesn't recognise any numbers or letters. I am not too worried about him settling in, as he is very social and gets on really well with other kids, but I am worried that he will get into trouble for being too active and that he will struggle with the learning side of things. I think the main thing is to really encourage them to play to their strengths. I am not in the least bit worried about whether my kids are academically successful or not; I just want them to enjoy the things that they like doing and do the best they can at school. I think the school system in this country puts far too much pressure on them to do too much too young. However within a rather faulty system, there are many wonderful and caring teachers who will really do their best to play to your child's strengths. I do worry about G starting school, but many people have reminded me that he won't be the first or the last very active little boy that the teachers have come across, and they will have strategies to help them focus and learn.

 

[AP]

Alex had two years in nursery and when she started school last year she couldnt read anything apart from her name really. She struggles to sit in one place, she couldnt even put pen to paper without throwing an utter fit about it. She couldn't talk until 4.5yrs, and was only just potty trained but needed assistance to the toilet. Her fine and gross motor skills were poor - she needed full assistance on stairs. I honestly thought school was going to be the worst thing ever - and fully expected she would be moved to a special school by the January.

Fast forward to almost a year later, and she is ridiculously ahead of her class at reading, she adores writing and drawing, they have taken her into little groups to focus on fine and gross motor skills and she can finally use stairs one foot to one step (iykwim) Her language has come on a treat and they are working on her understanding.

The move to school sounds a little restricting, I know, but it is half play half structured, almost a transition. Alex went from zero to amazing at writing and reading. Its hard to believe this was the same girl who straight out ran away when you opened a book.

The teachers will have seen children with all different strengths, weaknesses and capabilities and it wont be a problem. The coming year will be an eye opener for you, I am sure!

 

[kitabird]

Xander was totally uninterested in reading, writing, and anything else that involves sitting still! He's made great progress since September though, I honestly didn't think he would ever write his own name, but eventually he did! He loves drawing too, which he never gave any time to before. As others have said, there's so much play in reception, they do make learning fun. They spend time outdoors whenever they can too, it's not all indoors. Plus there are break times and lunchtime of course. From what I can gather, Xander has learned to behave appropriately in the classroom, and then goes totally bonkers in the playground! He's always got energy to burn after school too, but he has adjusted well to the routine. It will all work out, it just might take a bit of time for him to settle

 

[Wriggley]

Thank you for your replies ladies very reassuring !

Omars mum - I like the idea of cutting up magazines and sticking them down and drawing I may try that with him!

I'm hoping to find out more about the reception when we visit, they do have their own little allotment on the school grounds which lo will love

He to can't hold a pencil properly (yet his little brother can )

The letter I got was a tad overwhelming it had a list of things they would like him to know by the time he starts in September with tick boxes for you to tick as you practise each one

He can dress himself and go to the toilet himself and use a knife and fork all the practical things but the more academic things I not sure if he will be doing by then but it does sound like a lot of these things will get covered in reception

I not worried myself about what he can do I worried about him struggling. I don't wanna put pressure on him and worry they will

I think it's all just really new to me and hopefully il feel better after the visit

Thanks again ladies

 

[bathbabe]

Wriggley I have no advice but iv just watched those videos!! Amazing!! I cant even stand on a skateboard without falling over!! X

 

[Wriggley]

Wriggley I have no advice but iv just watched those videos!! Amazing!! I cant even stand on a skateboard without falling over!! X

Thanks he is a little dude bless him

 

[alibaba24]

cattia i think i need to take a leaf out of your book

 

[Cattia]

cattia i think i need to take a leaf out of your book

Believe me, my book is a story of all kinds of neurotic worries! Doing well at school isn't one of them though. I'm a teacher myself so I've seen over the years that the nicest kids and the ones who are going to get along well in life aren't always the high flyers. Social and emotional skills are more important in my opinion, it's a shame that schools aren't always given the time to prioritise these.

 

[alibaba24]

cattia i think i need to take a leaf out of your book

Believe me, my book is a story of all kinds of neurotic worries! Doing well at school isn't one of them though. I'm a teacher myself so I've seen over the years that the nicest kids and the ones who are going to get along well in life aren't always the high flyers. Social and emotional skills are more important in my opinion, it's a shame that schools aren't always given the time to prioritise these.

my girl has poor social skills because of her language problem but I am hoping school will help develop them. in the doctors waiting room the other day she approached a young boy and said "hi where are you from?" not exactly the best of introductions but she is trying

 

[Cattia]

cattia i think i need to take a leaf out of your book

Believe me, my book is a story of all kinds of neurotic worries! Doing well at school isn't one of them though. I'm a teacher myself so I've seen over the years that the nicest kids and the ones who are going to get along well in life aren't always the high flyers. Social and emotional skills are more important in my opinion, it's a shame that schools aren't always given the time to prioritise these.

my girl has poor social skills because of her language problem but I am hoping school will help develop them. in the doctors waiting room the other day she approached a young boy and said "hi where are you from?" not exactly the best of introductions but she is trying

Bless her, that's lovely! I was worried about my DD socially when she started school. She has always preferred older kids and can be over sensitive when relating to others, but she has settled in fine and seems to have made friends. They do a lot of work on communicating and talking in small groups. I still worry about this probably more than anything else, especially since she had a best friend at school who left and she hasn't clicked the same way with anyone else since then. It's hard but in the end you can't get in there and do it for them much as you want to, you just have to support them to find their own way. My DS is super social so I don't really have these worries about him.

 

[Jchihuahua]

Daisy is very academic but highly sensitive and finds change difficult so I was worried about her starting school for different reasons. I talked to her teacher about my concerns when we had a home visit and she really listened and helped to settle her and also kept us informed about how things were going. She did much better than we expected.

I teach reception and the things I would like children to do when starting school are managing their own toileting, putting on shoes, wellies and coats and recognising their name (not so concerned about writing it). There are always a number of children who can't do these things though and that's fine. The curriculum is very much play based and in my school the children have access to outdoors all day apart from during a few focussed teaching sessions (a phonics session, a maths session and a storytime).