Tantrums in public... Help!

[Kirstyjane87]

My 22 month old little girl has had the odd tantrum since she turned 1 normally over her wanting something to eat right before lunch/dinner and me saying she can have it in a little while as dinners about to be ready! However I have noticed the past month they r becoming more and more and even in public. I know most children throw tantrums at some point but I don't know how I should b handling them! Especially in public and I feel like such a failure when she is screaming on the ground

In public it's been when we are in a queue in a shop and she has seen chocolate/sweets whilst stood in the queue. I explain that she's not having any chocolate today and that she's had her snack already so it be tea time soon she goes mental screaming and kicking. Which is fine I will let her carry on and tell her to let me know when she is finished. However she will literally be running off through the queue back to these chocolates!!! If I try to hold on to her she gets more and more worked up. I was on my own this particular time and it was in argos so had to wait for my item to arrive so if I was any where else I probably would have just left the shop!! I just felt so embarrassed like everybody was looking and thinking I couldn't control my child.

She also throws a fit when I try to get her coat on (whether we r at home about to go out or already out but in a restaurant about to leave for example). I explain to her she needs her coat on as it's very cold outside and she will cry and roll around on the floor making it difficult!!! What do u all do in these situations? Xxxx

 

[Mrs HM]

That all sounds very familiar only my DS plays up when I try to restrict his movements. He wants to run about everywhere and has the most awful fits of rage/temper/tears/hitting etc sometimes. It used to embarrass me but now I just tell him that he is too big to behave that way and that he is embarrassing himself LOL! Most of the time I just hold tightly onto him while he wriggles and struggles and I try to remain calm and not let it get to me.

People used to stare - one old lady actually tutted at us in Boots once - but i refuse to let him run around in places where it isn't suitable and he has to learn that.

 

[suzib76]

Ignore everyone else, there opinion really isn't important

I just deal with tantrums outside as I would in the house

Jack was a nightmare, he is autistic and I used to have to sit down and hold him for ten minutes at a time when he was little to get him to calm down

 

[Mummy May]

My little girl is the same, she hasn't been as bad this past couple of weeks and I put it down to this - she was having a major tantrum in Asda because I wouldn't let her push the pram through the cafe because she was just banging into everyone (an old woman tutted at me too the bitch hahaha) and she was screaming and screaming so I picked her up and started screaming back at her, like copying her. It kind of shocked her into stopping because she said I was copying her and didn't like it lol! I will be that mother lying on the floor kicking my feet like on that tv advert xx

 

[Bex84]

ignore other people, don't worry what they think (which is easier said than done) because all toddlers have tantrums. I do what I do at home. I tell LO tantrums don't get her anywhere and mummy knows she is upset and that's fine but she needs to take a deep breath and calm down. If she throws her self on the floor she just gets picked up (at home I will stay near but let her get it out of her system) It helps to have a few snacks like fruit or bread sticks in bag so not hungry and drink ready, I make sure not to take mine on an empty stomach. My lo likes little jobs even when younger such as holding things and I will involve her in what we are doing. Food shopping is booring so we do it on internet as well then only have to pop in for short times. Make a shopping list so you don't end up being longer and I make sure Im talking to lo whole time. We have had the food tantrums, I try to avoid sweet aisle to be honest and use the self service. We never give in, if we said no sweets it means no sweets. In situations like you had in argos (Ive been there with the lovely tantrum which they don't want to stop) it depends on shop. I will get down to her level and in a low tone voice (children listen better to low tone rather than shouting) I tell her she needs to calm down, mummy does not expect that behaviour and she needs to be a big girl and listen, as I said before I tell her its fine to be upset but she cant scream and shout. I will stroke her back and then hold out arms and she will usually launch her self into a hug. Really don't worry about other people, if they are judging they are delusional that toddlers don't try it on

 

[steph.]

I've been there too! When we are out I try to distract her by pointing out something else or telling her a story or a lie " those chocolates belong to the little girl over there blah blah" or " that lady is coming to tell you off because of the way you are acting" while pointing to th scariest person I can find in my vicinity.

 

[BigAl]

I tell you it really is an eye opener having kids. Shops are just disgraceful for making this appeal to kids, like placing toys and crap where you can't stop your lo seeing them. Wonder how many tantrums would be avoided if they didn't stock sweets at the checkout?

 

[MLC20]

Hi this article may help you.

https://www.handinhandparenting.org/article/helping-children-with-tantrums-in-public/

Mine hasn't started it yet but, I know it's coming.

 

[shortie58]

Me my hubby and best friend too our daughter to a safari park for Father's Day at one point she was wet and didn't want her nappy changed it took us all to hold her down and at one point she was on her head!!! After that she through a wobbler about leaving the play park and lay down on the ground kicking and screaming we Ignored her and walked away, she was exhausted so we then tried to get her into her buggy well that was another three man team and it took 5. Ins and lots of kicking and screaming ... I was sooooo embarrassed but most of the parents that walked past said don't worry Lass we have all been there . Kinda put my mind at ease..

If she strops at home I tell her mummy is walking away until she starts to behave and walk in to another room, she doesn't like that so normally stops quickly x