Raspberries
2 boys, 1 girl in bump!
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2009
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The past week or so hasn't been fun and has really put me on a downer. So I thought it'd be good to get all my 'moans' out and invite other people to share to so I don't feel quite so stupid. 
People keep reminding me of how much of pregnancy I still have left, like I don't already know!
Then my pelvic girdle pain has got worse, so I'm now being referred to physio, I kinda expected this to happen because all my doctors have warned me early on that I have a small pelvis so have to be aware of aches and pains.
This has then kinda reminded me as such I'm pregnant, I obviously know I am but still think "oh I'm not that big" or "I can do that"... then can't. Like the other day I tried to bend down to pick up my cardigan in asda as it'd fallen on the floor and couldn't reach cos it ached so bad that I almost burst into tears with frustration, luckily my mum calmed me down.
I'm terrified of going into early labour or something going wrong, so when my boy barely moved over a 2 day period, I got so worked up and panicky, and despite listening to his heartbeat several times, and even going to hospital to get him checked, (everything was fine!) I cried for hours. Luckily, lastnight he had this ginormous movement and has since been proper kicking again. The midwife at hospital was right, it was cos he had turned to face my back I couldn't feel much before.
And then my OH, he's been completely lovely and amazing lately, helping with the pain and saying he understands about us not having sex, and doesn't mind, aslong as me and the baby are ok. But I just made a jokey comment about him downloading porn, and then he said he had quite a few videos on his phone. And I was like "What?!" I know its normal for men to look at it and there's nothing wrong with it but stupidly and naively I'd never thought he had. And it made me feel like I didn't know him anymore, as stupid as that is, just cos not once in the past year and a half had I thought about it really. It just made me feel totally disgusted and I'm finding it hard to look at him. I don't know, perhaps I'm jealous because we can't have sex that he's fantasisng about women in the videos or something. I know its irrational and unfair of me to think like this but with everything else lately, its all snowballed and upset me.
Sorry, I needed to get that all out
People keep reminding me of how much of pregnancy I still have left, like I don't already know!
Then my pelvic girdle pain has got worse, so I'm now being referred to physio, I kinda expected this to happen because all my doctors have warned me early on that I have a small pelvis so have to be aware of aches and pains.
This has then kinda reminded me as such I'm pregnant, I obviously know I am but still think "oh I'm not that big" or "I can do that"... then can't. Like the other day I tried to bend down to pick up my cardigan in asda as it'd fallen on the floor and couldn't reach cos it ached so bad that I almost burst into tears with frustration, luckily my mum calmed me down.
I'm terrified of going into early labour or something going wrong, so when my boy barely moved over a 2 day period, I got so worked up and panicky, and despite listening to his heartbeat several times, and even going to hospital to get him checked, (everything was fine!) I cried for hours. Luckily, lastnight he had this ginormous movement and has since been proper kicking again. The midwife at hospital was right, it was cos he had turned to face my back I couldn't feel much before.
And then my OH, he's been completely lovely and amazing lately, helping with the pain and saying he understands about us not having sex, and doesn't mind, aslong as me and the baby are ok. But I just made a jokey comment about him downloading porn, and then he said he had quite a few videos on his phone. And I was like "What?!" I know its normal for men to look at it and there's nothing wrong with it but stupidly and naively I'd never thought he had. And it made me feel like I didn't know him anymore, as stupid as that is, just cos not once in the past year and a half had I thought about it really. It just made me feel totally disgusted and I'm finding it hard to look at him. I don't know, perhaps I'm jealous because we can't have sex that he's fantasisng about women in the videos or something. I know its irrational and unfair of me to think like this but with everything else lately, its all snowballed and upset me.
Sorry, I needed to get that all out
I understand the whole porn thing. I know men watch porn...but the thought of MY OH doing just makes me feel SICK! He doesn't need to see anyone else naked or doing things like that. 
I need to go coz some stuff in the family lately..isn't very nice...and I have no way of getting there with Liam unless I pay £30 to get the train. I don't have the money atm. Ahhh I wish I had more money..time to check the lotto results..I'll be back to moan if the numbers are all one away from mine. Lol.
hope your LO stays put for a bit longer 
i'm still hoping i'll go into labour naturally. yeah my induction is booked for Thursday, so i'd be 40+11, FX'd I follow your lead & things start by 40+9 
