The Reasons I was Given

[valb]

I desperately wanted a home birth with my last baby (my 3rd), but I was told UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES. Here are the reasons for saying no.

1 - When I was 3 years old I had heart surgery. The surgery left no heart heart problems and as far as I know its not passed on, here is the bumf about it.

Patent ductus arteriosus (PDA) is a heart problem that occurs soon after birth in some babies. In PDA, abnormal blood flow occurs between two of the major arteries connected to the heart.

Before birth, the two major arteries—the aorta and the pulmonary (PULL-mun-ary) artery—are connected by a blood vessel called the ductus arteriosus. This vessel is an essential part of fetal blood circulation.

Within minutes or up to a few days after birth, the vessel is supposed to close as part of the normal changes occurring in the baby's circulation.

In some babies, however, the ductus arteriosus remains open (patent). This opening allows oxygen-rich blood from the aorta to mix with oxygen-poor blood from the pulmonary artery. This can put strain on the heart and increase blood pressure in the lung arteries.

PDA is a relatively common congenital heart defect . The condition occurs more often in premature infants (on average, occurring in about
8 of every 1,000 births). However, PDA also occurs in full-term infants (on average, occurring in about 2 of every 1,000 births). I have no effects from this at all, the surgery corrected it.

2 In 2000 I had a femoral thrombosis. This was treated with Fragmin and has never re-occurred. I had to give myself fragmin injections every day from 6 months pregnant as a precaution because they never found the cause.

3 I have a high BMI - Not sure what it was then, but what they class as obese anyway.

4 - I was 38

I had the most horrific birth experience in hospital and my midwife actually drove past me one day after the birth and stopped her car and said she thought of me often and she was actually worried how she was going to get me through it. None of the reasons above were to blame though and in hindsight I realise it was probably all down to fear.

We are trying for number 4 right now and I am wondering if there is any way of avoiding the same thing happening again.

Any advice most welcomed ladies.
V
xxx

 

[wigglywoo]

Don't have any advice but didn't want to R&R. Have you looked at www.homebirth.org.uk to see if any of the reasons you have been given are addressed there?

You can request a homebirth against medical advice. It is only advice that a MW, Dr or consultant can give and you are not under obligation to accept it. You have a choice about where to give birth.

 

[Tegans Mama]

If they give you the same reply next time, and are as nasty about it as they seem to have been last time, I'd be tempted to say well "Under no circumstances will I be taking YOUR ADVICE". I can't believe how pigheaded some doctors can be! It's your body. You could have your baby in a tent and there would be nothing they could do to stop you.

I'd also recommend getting a doula to advocate for you. Someone who knows statistics and knows YOU will be a wonderful tool.

 

[valb]

Thank you both, what I really wonder is, would I be risking my baby or myself if I dig my heels in next time. They were unable to help me at hospital they couldn't even get a drip line in without an anesthetist coming to do it and it took him ages. They put a scalp clip on the baby and it was faulty and showed him upside down and they decided he was breach, I had loads of people palpating, prodding and then an internal exam and a scan (accompanied by yelling from me), only to find he was fine. They kept offering me an epidural but the anesthetist couldn't get it in and was hitting nerves making my legs fly about, and bruised me from shoulders to bottom, my poor husband was traumatised standing helpless at the side. I think my body retracted, it was like my veins shrank back and said go away. At one point they kept saying do you want the anesthetist back. I said 'WHAT FOR' and they just stood looking at me, saying 'em'. It was so upsetting. My Dad had passed away 3 weeks before in that very hospital and although he was ill he died of a hospital infection, it was the VERY LAST place I wanted to be.
I don't know if any amount of persuasion will make it any better next time around.

 

[allaboard]

i think i would ask for a debriefing of the birth and discuss exactly what part of the labour was complicated by your health issues. If none of them were, and it's unlikely the management of your labour will be any different, i'd question the reasons why you can't stay at home/be more natural and left alone. Ie was an epidural sited IN CASE you deteriorated and need a crash section, etc. Or was the epidural more to help with physiological effects of your condition that are at odds with labour. It does sound like you were heavily managed and intervened with for no obvious and justifyably clear reason. Second babies tend to be a more straight forward affair and i personally would either have a home birth or have very clear directives with the consultant and the MWs about what you will and won't tolerate next time and have a natural/no continual monitoring/water birth at hospital. Good luck

 

[valb]

This was my 3rd baby but I had a 20 year gap, ie I was 19 with my first 21 with my 2nd and 39 with my 3rd. I didnt even know home birth was an option back in 1989. My hospital is a major teaching hospital and they do tend to have a huge amount of people pushing in to your care. Plus, any students get their knickers in a knot with excitement over anyone who has had heart surgery. With my 2nd I was in hospital on a busy day and I laboured away behind a curtain for 8 hours with the odd nose poking in. They eventually came and said they didnt think I was in labour, I had not asked for help or pain relief, but they would do an exam before letting me go. I whispered to my husband I wasnt going anywhere, and no wonder, I was 6cm dilated. I obviously do better left alone.

 

[Daisydog]

Your hospital experience sounds very upsetting. I hope you are able to discuss it with your midwife again and come to a happy conclusion. Either way I would consider looking into hypnobirthing techniques to help you feel more in control regardless of where you have your baby.

 

[valb]

Your hospital experience sounds very upsetting. I hope you are able to discuss it with your midwife again and come to a happy conclusion. Either way I would consider looking into hypnobirthing techniques to help you feel more in control regardless of where you have your baby.

I dont know anything about hypnobirthing but it is something I will be looking in to.