There is hope!

[Milliesun]

Hello all
Just a quickie to give you hope and to tell you not to believe the usual rubbish written about being over 35.

I started ttc at 38. My cycle was regular but bought some ovulation sticks just to make sure! When I got the 'smiley face' it was time to get down to it! Afterwards I would lie still for half hour with my legs in the air. The first time of trying I got a positive pregnancy test, however a couple of days later af turned up (chemical pregnancy loss). Was devastated, but tried again and within 2 months was pregnant. At 10 weeks I had a miscarriage. Gutted. I was determined and again we tried. Another positive pregnancy! I had some bleeding and was so worried but a scan at 7 weeks showed a heartbeat. Then a 12 week scan.

To cut a long story short I had a fantastic pregnancy and gave birth to a beautiful healthy 9lb 9oz daughter in 2010 at the age of 40.

There are lots of 'older' moms out there so keep positive.


Good luck to you all

 

[TLC]

Thank you for your story, as a 39 year old TTC#1 your story gives me a warm fuzzy feeling

 

[Milliesun]

:hugs

Thank you for your story, as a 39 year old TTC#1 your story gives me a warm fuzzy feeling

 

[Bonnie1990]

Thank you so much for the inspiration Milliesun! I helps so much to hear good news as well as the struggles. None of us are alone!

 

[Garnet]

Beautiful baby and congrats!!!

 

[sarahincanada]

I know you posting this was to try and encourage us, but honestly for most of is it probably doesnt and I wish bnb would have some sort of rules about these 'hope' posts in this section.

you are obviously one of those very fertile people seeing as you had 3 BFPs in a short amount of time, but many of us over 35 are not. Many of us have not seen a BFP in 1 or 2 years, so there is no 'hope' for us from your message. I do get hope when I see a regular member who has been trying for a while finally gets a bfp, thats more relatable than someone who tried 3 times and got a bfp each time.

sorry if this is a negative post, but we should be able to respond how we feel. I know you have the best intentions posting this and are bringing hope to the general idea that being over 35 means that its hard to have children.
congrats on your beautiful baby!

 

[Garnet]

^You are RUDE!!! As a person that just lost my baby and have had several MCs any sort of inspiration or hope is welcomed... I wish you would not be nasty to people who are trying to give other's hope....

 

[Bonnie1990]

I know you posting this was to try and encourage us, but honestly for most of is it probably doesnt and I wish bnb would have some sort of rules about these 'hope' posts in this section.

you are obviously one of those very fertile people seeing as you had 3 BFPs in a short amount of time, but many of us over 35 are not. Many of us have not seen a BFP in 1 or 2 years, so there is no 'hope' for us from your message. I do get hope when I see a regular member who has been trying for a while finally gets a bfp, thats more relatable than someone who tried 3 times and got a bfp each time.

sorry if this is a negative post, but we should be able to respond how we feel. I know you have the best intentions posting this and are bringing hope to the general idea that being over 35 means that its hard to have children.
congrats on your beautiful baby!

Sarah,
While I appreciate your opinion as well as viewpoint I disagree. We are all newbies at some point-on cycle 1 to TTC. Some are just luckier than others. As a newbie on c1 myself, I am taking in all of the possibilities an over 35 TTC can hold. Good and bad. Easy and difficult. I didn't realize that TTC over 35 was an automatic dx of infertility-and I didn't think this site or section was only for those who fit that mold.
to you for your transfer this month!
Bonnie

 

[Milliesun]

I know you posting this was to try and encourage us, but honestly for most of is it probably doesnt and I wish bnb would have some sort of rules about these 'hope' posts in this section.

you are obviously one of those very fertile people seeing as you had 3 BFPs in a short amount of time, but many of us over 35 are not. Many of us have not seen a BFP in 1 or 2 years, so there is no 'hope' for us from your message. I do get hope when I see a regular member who has been trying for a while finally gets a bfp, thats more relatable than someone who tried 3 times and got a bfp each time.

sorry if this is a negative post, but we should be able to respond how we feel. I know you have the best intentions posting this and are bringing hope to the general idea that being over 35 means that its hard to have children.
congrats on your beautiful baby!

I am sorry if I caused offence, however I totally disagree that 'hope posts' are wrong!

The thread is for women over 35ttc. As a 41 year old, I think I am entitled to post!!! When I had a miscarriage I came on here for information and the positive messages kept me going. That's what I was trying to do here!

Women of all ages can have trouble ttc and yes, I was lucky to conceive quickly. That's why I mentioned the ovulation sticks as they worked for me.

I have a friend who could not get pregnant for years. She went down the ivf route. She had 2 failed attempts and then on the 3rd attempt it worked. She now has twins

One last thought .... Imagine how depressing this thread would be if no one could give a happy ending?

X

 

[readyformore]

^You are RUDE!!! As a person that just lost my baby and have had several MCs any sort of inspiration or hope is welcomed... I wish you would not be nasty to people who are trying to give other's hope....

I don't think she is being nasty at all.
She even congratulated the op and called her baby beautiful, (which, I agree with).

Some people like the inspiration stories, and others do not. Obviously, you're one that does. I personally, don't find them encouraging. If someone is 6 years older than me, and conceives about 19 months sooner than me, it reinforces how messed up my fertility is and has the opposite effect. I don't feel hopeful, I feel more broken.

 

[Milliesun]

^You are RUDE!!! As a person that just lost my baby and have had several MCs any sort of inspiration or hope is welcomed... I wish you would not be nasty to people who are trying to give other's hope....

I don't think she is being nasty at all.
She even congratulated the op and called her baby beautiful, (which, I agree with).

Some people like the inspiration stories, and others do not. Obviously, you're one that does. I personally, don't find them encouraging. If someone is 6 years older than me, and conceives about 19 months sooner than me, it reinforces how messed up my fertility is and has the opposite effect. I don't feel hopeful, I feel more broken.

I am so sorry. Really wish I had not posted now

X

 

[readyformore]

^You are RUDE!!! As a person that just lost my baby and have had several MCs any sort of inspiration or hope is welcomed... I wish you would not be nasty to people who are trying to give other's hope....

I don't think she is being nasty at all.
She even congratulated the op and called her baby beautiful, (which, I agree with).

Some people like the inspiration stories, and others do not. Obviously, you're one that does. I personally, don't find them encouraging. If someone is 6 years older than me, and conceives about 19 months sooner than me, it reinforces how messed up my fertility is and has the opposite effect. I don't feel hopeful, I feel more broken.

I am so sorry. Really wish I had not posted now

X

I know that you didn't do it to hurt, it was intended for the opposite reason.
There is no way to anticipate how people will respond to what is said, (and I understand that as a mother, you want to celebrate your baby).
Some of us are just really struggling in the ttc forum, that's all. It's our haven.

 

[sarahincanada]

its just all these message of hope are always from people who never usually post in the over 35 section, but just come in here to give hope then leave. if anyone spent anytime in here they would know that the majority of people in here do not get pregnant that quickly. Im not saying that someone shouldnt post in here, but the message of hope is just not relatable for most of us, thats all, and in fact does the opposite.

garnet she wasnt posting this as hope for people who have had losses, but for those over 35 and that was what I was replying to. Im sorry if you think I was rude and sorry for your loss.

 

[sarahincanada]

I am so sorry. Really wish I had not posted now

X

as mentioned in my post I know you have the best intentions posting this and are bringing hope to the general idea that being over 35 means that its hard to have children. I do think that some people will get hope from your message and I know I did at the beginning. Im on my 24th month with no hint of a bfp so please forgive my negativity.

 

[Bonnie1990]

X[/QUOTE]


I know that you didn't do it to hurt, it was intended for the opposite reason.
There is no way to anticipate how people will respond to what is said, (and I understand that as a mother, you want to celebrate your baby).
Some of us are just really struggling in the ttc forum, that's all. It's our haven.[/QUOTE]

It's true..everyone is different and will have a different reaction. But as you said this is our haven. It is for me too as I have no one else to talk to about our TTC except my DB. And he doesn't get all my temp taking and charting and OPK's. I hope I don't struggle like so many do. I have never experienced the pain of a mc or a bfn. Maybe I never will. Or maybe I'll be here next year struggling alongside others.
Not that I would ever suggest anyone leave this group but those that want could choose a different forum such as LTTTC or assisted conception. I came here because I am over 35 and TTC. That is a very broad category.

I say none of this to offend anyone. Only voicing my opinion.

 

[Bonnie1990]

PS
It is just as hard to be a newbie and trying to keep a PMA while searching for support ans proactively educating herself yet be surrounded by stories of Difficulties and losses. Therefore positive stories of those with success over 35 are just as important.

Just saying.

 

[Milliesun]

I am so sorry. Really wish I had not posted now

X

as mentioned in my post I know you have the best intentions posting this and are bringing hope to the general idea that being over 35 means that its hard to have children. I do think that some people will get hope from your message and I know I did at the beginning. Im on my 24th month with no hint of a bfp so please forgive my negativity.

I can totally understand your negativity and I really hope you get that bfp.

Again I am sorry for causing any upset. Should have realised that there are so many women out there with different circumstances. Xx

 

[readyformore]

Not that I would ever suggest anyone leave this group but those that want could choose a different forum such as LTTTC or assisted conception. I came here because I am over 35 and TTC. That is a very broad category.

And yes, this is why I VERY rarely venture out of my own ltttc thread, or the assisted conception thread. Thanks for the reminder.

 

[Garnet]

its just all these message of hope are always from people who never usually post in the over 35 section, but just come in here to give hope then leave. if anyone spent anytime in here they would know that the majority of people in here do not get pregnant that quickly. Im not saying that someone shouldnt post in here, but the message of hope is just not relatable for most of us, thats all, and in fact does the opposite.

garnet she wasnt posting this as hope for people who have had losses, but for those over 35 and that was what I was replying to. Im sorry if you think I was rude and sorry for your loss.

Not only have I had loss but I am over 35 (Actually 40+) had trouble TTC. I been at this struggle for going on now to 3 years. I am encouraged by anyone that can share their struggle to conceive. How they did it may help others conceive. I struggle for almost a year TTC and I learn alot of information from women who conceived and it help me get a BP twice. Please there are others out there that welcome this information and are inspired by how they conceived.

 

[anorak]

I like someone sharing their amazing news. I love the thought of hope. I know I am only just off BC, and I pray for my time. It makes me happy reading happy stories. What a beautiful baby Milliesun.