thinking about labour. what advice can you give
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Eleanor ace
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Not sure if tis was intended for me, so ignore me if not!
I didn't have an epi but the pain in my back from the spinal was quite bad, the sorest part of recovery (more than the recovery pain from the tear) and the pain lasted on and off for a few months (in fact I occassionally still get back pain from it 3 years post partum, someting my physio said isn't that uncommon
). I didn't need assistance getting either baby out but I probably would have done with my DD if I'd had an epi as she got stuck and the position which got her out was moving to standing which I wouldn't have been able to do if I had the epi and couldn't feel my legs.
Eleanor ace
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I think normally you get anti sickness medicine in your IV when you have an epidural. I got it with my spinal. I know some people do get really sick with the epidural but I think most don't. You could ask your MW for your hospitals leaflet on pain relief, mine had a section on the risks and benefits of each, it had things like the % of people who get paralysis or partial paralysis from an epidural (very small %), percentage of people who got severe headaches or vomiting and % of people who had a failed epidural. Maybe reading that will help you feel more confident in making a decission and less worried if you do go for an epi.
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I had zero back pain from the epi. I was a little nervous when it was being put in but honestly, I was in transitional labor at that point and that was more intense than what was going in my back. After it was taken out, it wasn't even sore or anything. Of course, you're pretty focused on your LO so maybe I just don't remember it.
And I did not need any assistance with getting baby out. I was able to feel every contraction (the pressure not pain) and pushed when I felt like pushing and didn't have to be told when. I did tear but did so naturally and didn't need an episiotomy. Every experience is different but for me, it was a wonderful one as it took away the pain but not the feeling and had no side effects.
I will say that there was a very good chance that my epi wouldn't have kicked in in time for delivery. I requested it at 8 cm. My labor slowed down enough that it gave it time to work but a lot of times when you request it so late it doesn't kick in until after baby is born. Just something to keep in mind
laura109
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Thank you. I will be fine with abit of back pain after. As long as its not long term. Im sure the midwives will discuss all this further along but im not sure what week they discuss labour with you.
Im not generally sick so hopefully i wont be but i can cope if its just sips of drink anyhow. I get quite panicked about vomiting in general.
The epidural i feel is appealing to me when it gets too much. Gas and air is a very mild pain relief and often it leaves women dizzy or sickly. I basically dont want to be feeling sick or being sick in labour and when my daughter is born i dont want to spend the first few hours of her life throwing up lol.
i know im worrying and panicking at the moment. It just feels i find a plan im happy with and one of my friends or someone they know has had a horrible experience with that. I know every womens different though. Xxx
Im not generally sick so hopefully i wont be but i can cope if its just sips of drink anyhow. I get quite panicked about vomiting in general.
The epidural i feel is appealing to me when it gets too much. Gas and air is a very mild pain relief and often it leaves women dizzy or sickly. I basically dont want to be feeling sick or being sick in labour and when my daughter is born i dont want to spend the first few hours of her life throwing up lol.
i know im worrying and panicking at the moment. It just feels i find a plan im happy with and one of my friends or someone they know has had a horrible experience with that. I know every womens different though. Xxx
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Just quickly about gas and air - even if youre one of the ones who finds it makes you sick, the symptoms and side effects all so as soon as you stop using it, so there's no way it will make you throw up for hours .
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P
purplecupcake
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Some women do experience longterm back pain from epidurals. 3 of my friends get pain whenever the weather turns cold. Just something to think about!
The pain is over as soon as the baby is born but an epidural will last much longer. And like someone said, when the pain gets unbearable, you're almost done! It's your decision of course, but I am just SUCH an advocate for natural deliveries. The natural high you get from not being on any meds is incredible! As intense as it was, I would do natural again and again.
P
purplecupcake
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I actually yelled a lot more than I thought I would, haha. But don't let that scare you, it just felt good to groan, it released the energy.
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TV Labours are always immobilized women lying on their backs as well. So so so much more difficult. There are many natural coping techniques that can be employed. Some women definitely do scream (its often a more gutteral/animalistic type of groaning though that helps release the pain than an actual scream in pain). In both Labours I only felt like it was all two much one time each, and that was at the beginning of transition when you know its almost over.
When you have good support, are active, and employ techniques such as hot water, counter pressure, swaying your hips etc, its really not bad I promise and you are rewaedednwith such a natural high at the end that is literally undescribable. Babies born without drugs are so much more alert and breastfeed better.
Obviously its your choice, and women definitely have no reason to feel like a failure however a baby comes out of you but I really think women should go into birth expecting to not need drugs cause mentally that's half the battle. If you go in expecting you'll need them then you probably will.
When you have good support, are active, and employ techniques such as hot water, counter pressure, swaying your hips etc, its really not bad I promise and you are rewaedednwith such a natural high at the end that is literally undescribable. Babies born without drugs are so much more alert and breastfeed better.
Obviously its your choice, and women definitely have no reason to feel like a failure however a baby comes out of you but I really think women should go into birth expecting to not need drugs cause mentally that's half the battle. If you go in expecting you'll need them then you probably will.
Tigermom
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Hun, you sound like me with my first. For me... the best advice was putting everything away and winging it. I ended up not taking any birthing classes (not advised, but it worked for me), and just kind of going with the flow. However, that did lead to needing pain intervention: epidural or spinal block. Neither my hubby or I can remember which because I thought I had one, but the definition of what I experienced matched the other.
To speak to that, the epidural dosing is much milder now. They don't dope you up so much that you can't feel anything. You will still feel your contraction happening, but it won't be painful (usually. Some women still complain of pain even after). For me, I knew I was having a contraction, but I didn't have the urge to push, so I had to be instructed that it was "time", however, I knew when to push, and I could push (if that makes sense). Having said all of that, the recovery is the reason we are choosing natural this time around. I ended up needing a catheter put in because I couldn't control my urethra. That lead to quite a bit of pain during healing. Also with that, I tore during delivery, and it wasn't that bad. It itches during healing, but witch hazel takes care of that surprisingly well. But you are so excited and in gear that you don't care while they are happening
This time, I am attempting to go all natural. That has meant more preparation. I purchased "Active Labor" by Janet Balaskas, and that has been a blessing. It has taken away my aches and pains of pregnancy with the stretches it outlines, and many of those will prepare you, your mind, and your body/ligaments for labor. Even if you are not planning on going natural, it can be a super wonderful book because of the stretches and yoga poses.
I agree with the other comments: laying on your back will intensify your labor pains, and you will push longer because your sacrum isn't allowed to fully withdraw and allow the optimal space for baby's head. You don't have to go "natural" but you can still try different positions that work for you. Find what's most comfortable, and talk to your doctor about the options your place of delivery is set up for. I plan on using a squatting bar that attaches to the bed, and I have been practicing squatting from about 20 weeks or so.
No pregnancy follows a plan, and labor and delivery are the same. With my first son, my first two contractions were 5 minutes apart, and I was already 9cm dilated. Don't ask me how
I was so scared for that moment weeks prior, but when it happened, you go into mommy mode, and trust me, instinct kicks in. You will naturally move to the positions that are most comfortable. You might get on all fours and sway your hips, you might lean forward onto counters or walls and just breathe through it, you might walk and pace, you might lay on your side, you might squat, you might want a nice calming (never that hot) bath, you might bounce on a ball. Trust me... it is perfectly natural to think about everything you are thinking about right now.
If it helps, just remember that you are not alone in wondering. But also remember that your doctor is there to comfort you. Write all of your concerns and questions down and bring them to your doctor's attention. He/she will be glad to talk you through them. The other option (highly recommended) is to call your birthing center/hospital, and ask when you could come take a look around and see all the different things they offer to delivering mothers.
Oh and about the baby's head, every baby's head is funky shaped. It's the name of the game when they go through the birth canal. As far as damage go, your team will not let you push long enough to harm the child... I promise! If it came to that, you would have a C-section, and it shouldn't come to that
I hope this was helpful!!! You are not alone, hun!! Definitely look into that book, even if it doesn't spark your interest. It is a great read about how to prevent a lot of the things you are concerned about while not making you feel pressured towards delivering without drugs, like many other books on the market. There are about 50 pages of stretches and simple pregnancy-safe yoga poses to help you too!!!
To speak to that, the epidural dosing is much milder now. They don't dope you up so much that you can't feel anything. You will still feel your contraction happening, but it won't be painful (usually. Some women still complain of pain even after). For me, I knew I was having a contraction, but I didn't have the urge to push, so I had to be instructed that it was "time", however, I knew when to push, and I could push (if that makes sense). Having said all of that, the recovery is the reason we are choosing natural this time around. I ended up needing a catheter put in because I couldn't control my urethra. That lead to quite a bit of pain during healing. Also with that, I tore during delivery, and it wasn't that bad. It itches during healing, but witch hazel takes care of that surprisingly well. But you are so excited and in gear that you don't care while they are happening
This time, I am attempting to go all natural. That has meant more preparation. I purchased "Active Labor" by Janet Balaskas, and that has been a blessing. It has taken away my aches and pains of pregnancy with the stretches it outlines, and many of those will prepare you, your mind, and your body/ligaments for labor. Even if you are not planning on going natural, it can be a super wonderful book because of the stretches and yoga poses.
I agree with the other comments: laying on your back will intensify your labor pains, and you will push longer because your sacrum isn't allowed to fully withdraw and allow the optimal space for baby's head. You don't have to go "natural" but you can still try different positions that work for you. Find what's most comfortable, and talk to your doctor about the options your place of delivery is set up for. I plan on using a squatting bar that attaches to the bed, and I have been practicing squatting from about 20 weeks or so.
No pregnancy follows a plan, and labor and delivery are the same. With my first son, my first two contractions were 5 minutes apart, and I was already 9cm dilated. Don't ask me how
I was so scared for that moment weeks prior, but when it happened, you go into mommy mode, and trust me, instinct kicks in. You will naturally move to the positions that are most comfortable. You might get on all fours and sway your hips, you might lean forward onto counters or walls and just breathe through it, you might walk and pace, you might lay on your side, you might squat, you might want a nice calming (never that hot) bath, you might bounce on a ball. Trust me... it is perfectly natural to think about everything you are thinking about right now. If it helps, just remember that you are not alone in wondering. But also remember that your doctor is there to comfort you. Write all of your concerns and questions down and bring them to your doctor's attention. He/she will be glad to talk you through them. The other option (highly recommended) is to call your birthing center/hospital, and ask when you could come take a look around and see all the different things they offer to delivering mothers.
Oh and about the baby's head, every baby's head is funky shaped. It's the name of the game when they go through the birth canal. As far as damage go, your team will not let you push long enough to harm the child... I promise! If it came to that, you would have a C-section, and it shouldn't come to that
I hope this was helpful!!! You are not alone, hun!! Definitely look into that book, even if it doesn't spark your interest. It is a great read about how to prevent a lot of the things you are concerned about while not making you feel pressured towards delivering without drugs, like many other books on the market. There are about 50 pages of stretches and simple pregnancy-safe yoga poses to help you too!!!
laura109
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Thank you so much. I think im going to go in with an open mind. The midwives will be there to advice me and will be able to give me what i need.
I will look into books too. It might help my confidence. Its always scarier hearing about other peoples tears and vomiting etc but i may be nothing like that. My mum and sister never tore.
I have found alot of good honest advice on here and i am thankful to you all for taking time to help me.
Thanks xxx
I will look into books too. It might help my confidence. Its always scarier hearing about other peoples tears and vomiting etc but i may be nothing like that. My mum and sister never tore.
I have found alot of good honest advice on here and i am thankful to you all for taking time to help me.
Thanks xxx
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I just wanted to point out that this all depends on what kind of pain medication you use.
IV meds (pain narcotics) will pass the placenta to baby and can make mom and baby more drowsy after birth. My best friend had this during her first labor. The nurses didn't explain the side effects and said it was just "to take the edge off". It took her (remember every experience is different) 3 days to come out of a haze from them and be able to move around without assistance. They over medicated her. I'm not sure how bf'ing went for her initially but she was successful long term.
An epidural does not pass to baby and does not affect them during or after birth, it is just for Mom. My DS came out screaming and latched on within 30 minutes after birth and never had issues.
We don't have G&A in the US but from my understanding it doesn't cross to baby and the effects go away as soon as you stop using it.
Whether you choose natural delivery or to use pain medication, your labor and delivery will be your own unique story. In the end, as long as baby comes out (and she will!) and is healthy, the rest will work itself out. I was SO nervous going into it but once it got there, instinct really does take over. Just do whatever feels right/most comfortable to you!
Tigermom
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And it is important to remember that this is your story. Every birth story is BEAUTIFUL! Whether you end up needing the assistance of medication, you go all-natural, or you need a C-section. Every story is beautiful, and just thinking about that can help calm you too. No story goes according to plan, and no story is better than another.
Every birth is beautiful!
Every birth is beautiful!
laura109
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Yeah i totally agree. Im not ashamed if i need drugs. No point crying and screaming and getting stressed if u need some relief. If its a 12 hour plus labour it will get very tiring for example so im open minded. My mum had a high pain threshold did not feel her contractions very much. I could be like her or the total opposite.
im just guessing with my partners love and support and hopefullynice midwives ill be reassured and helped in whatever way i need.
I appreciate all the advice ypu ladies have given me. Im going to see how i go and see what happens. No point worrying
you have helped me alot thanks x
im just guessing with my partners love and support and hopefullynice midwives ill be reassured and helped in whatever way i need.
I appreciate all the advice ypu ladies have given me. Im going to see how i go and see what happens. No point worrying
you have helped me alot thanks x
Tigermom
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I'm so glad you found some relief!!!
It sounds like your partner will be your anchor, your grounding point, so remember your very own words, "im just guessing with my partners love and support and hopefullynice midwives ill be reassured and helped in whatever way i need." It sounds like that is what will keep you calm in the middle
It sounds like your partner will be your anchor, your grounding point, so remember your very own words, "im just guessing with my partners love and support and hopefullynice midwives ill be reassured and helped in whatever way i need." It sounds like that is what will keep you calm in the middle
