Thinking about stopping

[Marie000]

My little girl is 23 months old now. At around 17 months, we stopped on-demand breastfeeding and instead I had her nursing before her nap and before bed only.
That transition was fairly easy.

Now I think I am ready to stop altogether. It has been a nice journey, but I need to get my body back to myself.

Breastfeeding has become a big part of the bedtime routine. At nap time, we sometimes read a story (we may skip it if she is extra tired), nursing and then bed. At bedtime, she has a bath, story time with daddy, then she comes to fetch me for nursing time, than it's off to bed.
When she nurses, I am always the one to decide when she stops (or else it would take forever!). I warn her in advance ("we're almost done now, I am counting to five..." then at five I latch her off) so there is no drama.

How do I make the transition as gently as possible?
I feel bad about wanting to do it now, since we are also trying to potty train. But in just over a month, we will be moving, and shortly after I will be going back to work part time and she will be going to daycare. I know that is a lot of transitions happening in a short time, but that's why I am thinking of doing it now instead of after we move.

 

[Lizzybee]

Wow... Well done you!!! 23 months us amazing. I doubt I will be able to go that long mainly due to pressure from other people... I'm ashamed to say that.
I don't know what to suggest but didn't want to read and run. I would like to follow for answers as I hope to go to 12months.

 

[Eegee]

I'm certainly no expert but I think it's good that she's so understanding about being unlatched, so maybe she'd do well too if you were to explain that since she's a big girl now, you want her to start having a big girl bed time drink. You could make a big deal out of both having a drink of milk (or whatever you replace it with) whilst you snuggle and read a story so that the majority of the routine stays the same

 

[staralfur]

If you can do the nursing before the story then it might help her dissociate nursing from sleep a little bit and in turn make it easier to skip. We do nursing followed by story in bed and occasionally we forget the nursing part altogether.

 

[Marie000]

I was thinking of replacing the nursing with cow's milk, but I don't know if she would even want that. She never had cow's milk in a cup. I will have to try giving her some during the day today.

Switching the order of things might help. I'll have to try.
Last night, I let her nurse and then instead of putting her to bed right after, I held her tight while singing a lullaby. I guess that's another way to make the nursing not the last thing before sleep. I was thinking of doing that and then slowly reducing the length of nursing sessions.
Either that or I could gradually reduce the length of nursing sessions while gradually increasing the amount of milk I give her afterwards. It depends if she likes cow's milk or not.

I just hate changing her bedtime routine because she can be a nightmare at bedtime sometimes. Yesterday she cried so much when I put her in bed. I don't know if that's because of the change in routine or if she was cranky or a little sick.

 

[Maxy1]

I weaned DS fully at 22 months. He also had the nursing-sleep connection. I started by moving the feed to a different place. So instead of feeding him in his bed or bedroom I would do it in the lounge and then take him to bed. Once we got used to that I moved it around a bit. So did it 15 mins before bed and then half an hour and so on. Then I did a don't offer-don't refuse kinda thing where when he asked to BF I would ask him if he was thirsty and he inevitably would say yes and I would go get him a drink in a sippy cup to drink. It took less than a week for him to ask for the cup drink instead, I think because it was still play time and he could keep playing while drinking from his cup.

 

[Marie000]

well, two days ago I tried switching nursing from after storytime to before. She nursed happily, then read stories with me, but then she asked to nurse again. When I said no, it was the end of the world for her. She looked sad, angry, betrayed. OH took over and rocked her to sleep, but that didn't go well either.

I'm scared to try again.
Maybe I can explain it to her before, but I'm not sure how much she understands.

 

[Maxy1]

I don't think you should tell her no without another option. She should be full if she has just had a feed, so I would probably ask her if she wants a drink of something and get her that. If she doesn't want a drink of something else offer her cuddles and a song or something else special that only happens then.

Is she still feeding for nutrition or is it just a comfort thing?