Toddler suddenly changed

[laura109]

Hi everyone my toddler is 2 & a half and about a week ago she started having really stubborn tantrums. I literally cant win. For example she asks for an apple. I give her it, she says no, i put it back and she goes mad screaming my apple. So i offer her it again and she repeats the same steps. This could result in a paddy lasting half hour plus.

If other peoples kids come around she goes absolutely mad if they try play with ber. I dont allow her to snatch or lash out at the other child so i remove her but she continues to go crazy on my knee. My friend wants to meet up friday but i honestly cant see how theres anything i can do at the moment as i cant get my daughter to be happy and content.

I took her to the park today with my friend and her son who is also 2.5. She was just teary & making out she didn't like anything he did from dinosaur roaring at her to cuddling her. She ended up a sobbing mess on the climbing frame.

She has been abit harder to get to sleep at night possibly loosing 2 hours sleep a night lately. She still naps After dinner. I tried cutting it out but her moods got worse. On Friday i told my friend at one id have to put my daughter down for a sleep. She didn't leave till 3 & my daughter just couldn't cope with being overtired.

Im really not enjoying anything with her at the moment. She runs of in the parks she wont listen. She's constantly crying. She kicks off in asda. She gets angry in the car.

Shes starting nursery in September just 3 hours 2 days a week. Im starting to worry how it will work for her as two weeks ago she was a happy go lucky toddler.

Is this a stage or me missing something?

 

[MindUtopia]

I think it's a stage. Mine has had a few of these, though usually only a few days to a week. But I suspect it's compounded by the impending changes (starting nursery, arrival of baby in a few months, assuming she knows). It could also be she is about to drop her naps soon which is why sleep and naps are weird and she's overtired.

 

[Scout]

I think it's a phase. I recall dd going thru the whole, "I want so and so" and then crying or throwing it if i gave it to her, and then if I put it away, she'd cry for it. It was as if nothing I did was right or could please her. And we had a short time with tantrums like I'd never seen before. She grew out of it though, thank goodness.

 

[jessmke]

My DD does the whole asking for something then getting upset when I give it to her thing. It doesn't end in a tantrum and isn't nearly as extreme as your daughter, but I always just put whatever she is asking for within her reach so if she really does want it then she can get it. Like if she asks for an apple and then gets upset when I hand it to her, I will go put it on her snack table and then ignore any fussiness that ensues (she doesn't do full on tantrums yet, I'm sure those will come in the next few months!). Without fail almost every time she will get upset for a minute or two and then go to the table and pick up the apple.

 

[Zephram]

It's a phase. She'll do it for a while and then move on to the next delightful bit of toddler behaviour.

 

[Teri7489]

I agree with a phase. My dd did is (there's a post on here about it somewhere) and my son who's will be 2 next month has just started it. He will ask for a drink, I will give him one and he will lie in the floor crying for absolutely no reason. If I put it away he will only cry louder. If I sit the cup down he will get up and take it. Toddlers are hard work!

 

[Button#]

Yep a phase. Mine was doing this a couple of weeks ago and no doubt will be like it again in the next week or so. I tend to ignore the tantrums and tell her I'll talk to her when she's calmed down.

 

[nicem815]

I also think it is a phase. I've been noticing how many phases my child goes through and how they can change from week to week! Hang in there!

 

[Tigerlily01]

Yup, phase. Brace yourself, it can last a while. Just stay calm and try to set her up for success as much as possible (i.e. If she has certain triggers that set her off, try some other activities for a bit.) I found our tantrums decreased the more we got out of the house, and the more we had established changes of scenery and activity (i.e. Ok, now we're going to play in your room. Ok, lets have lunch. We're going to the park now. Ok, time to color in the kitchen.) as opposed to just having all he toys out and staying in the living room all day. Bonus if its quasi predictable.

Another thing that worked for us (for a time) was positive time outs. They are NOT punishment. It's just a quiet place in the house you go to TOGETHER to read or do a puzzle or something quiet and calm down/hug. Introduce it as a fun thing when she is behaving and make a little game of it, so she enjoys it. Then you can use it to transition form a tantrum to a new activity.

 

[Button#]

Ha ha, it is indeed a week later and my DD is going through another tantrum phase. She had about 4 yesterday but she also refused to nap so I'm pretty sure that's why. She's struggling with wanting to be very independent and also needing a lot of reassurance at the moment. I hope your LO has given you a break.

 

[minties]

Oh yeah, I remember this stage! Thomas had it BAD. He was a right little stroppy mess at 2.5 - it's like some sort of power struggle! Sophie never did it, she's never had a 'bad' phase, for want of a better word. But most kids I have met have done this at some point or other, Sophie did do the asking for something, then acting like she doesn't want it bit though, for a while.