Troubles with 4 year old and school

[saitiffeh]

A bit of background: My son turned 4 years old in November and he started Junior Kindergarten in September. So he was only 3 when he started school. He goes every other day for the full day. He is a very hyperactive little boy, ADHD runs very predominately on his father's side and I am expecting that he will be diagnosed with it as well. I have gotten several comments from his teacher regarding the fact that he just cannot sit still and has a hard time paying attention. He is all over the place. He is not a mean or rude child at all, he has a lot of love in him. He just wants to play, to hug, and to have fun. But he just cannot sit still.

He has a learning support teacher that works with him in his class now and his teacher says things are working well. He tried oh so hard to sit still and pay attention. He does absorb the information even when he seems off in day-dream land, so I am not worried about him intellectually. He is a very smart boy, just has a hard time paying attention. His teacher has been trying numerous things with him, some have been working, and I've been doing what I can at home.

Today's problem was the school bus. His driver has complained before that he is all over the place. Well today apparently he got kicked off the bus. KICKED OFF! He is four! A teacher had to come pick him up while the bus waited. I understand he was all over the place, flopping around on people, jumping in his seat... it was unsafe and he knows it. But no-body even called me, I didn't find out until the end of the day and I couldn't get all the info I wanted as a long line of cars was waiting for the bus to move.

Me and OH had a long talk with LO but I am at a loss. Is there anyone out there who has dealt with these kind of problems? I need to find some ways to encourage him to sit and pay attention...and to figure out how to handle this bus situation.

 

[RachA]

Sorry that I can't really help. All I know is that I think they are expecting alot of him as he's only just turned 4. However I can understand why the driver had a problem with him being all over the place.

What is the deal with the school bus? Does he have to go on it? Are there any other adults on it?

 

[saitiffeh]

His school is about a half hour walk from our house, and it's the closest in the area. In the mornings there's one adult, the driver, and in the afternoon she has a helper. I can completely understand her concern over the way my son was behaving but I feel bad that kicking him off was apparently the best course of action. She could have moved him to the front and separate him from the child he was bothering, not embarrass him and make him cry in front of the rest of the students.

My son is very hyperactive. It's hard for him to sit still, and he just is so happy to ride the bus and go to school. I'm hoping the discussion me, OH and LO had helps, and that the advice I give the bus driver regarding simple techniques that help my osn calm down help.

 

[Tanikit]

Surely he should have a seatbelt on and be expected to sit down - it is hard to control a lot of children but I am afarid that just like in cars whether he is hyperactive or not it is a rule that children sit down - you will have to enforce that one very strictly - maybe he could have a toy he could play with only on the bus. It does sound like they are expecting a lot of him in class but on the bus it is a safety issue - my own daughter had to learn at 2 that she had to sit still and could not take her seateblt off - it did take a few times of stopping and redoing her seatbelt to get the message through but she behaves now and knows that transport safety issues are not something she will win on EVER. I am afraid that maybe kicking him off the bus is the only thing that will work - though they should perhaps phone you rather.

Glad you could talk to the bus driver - changing seats is a good first step or perhaps even getting an older kid to look after him if there is one (that child would need to be spoken to first too to make sure she did a good job)

 

[saitiffeh]

He is actually supposed to have a bigger kid as his "bus buddy", but they've never enforced that rule =/

I can totally understand that he needs to sit, and he knows that too. I wish the school bus did have seat belts, it could keep him in one spot! LO knows what he did was wrong and hopefully he corrects the behavior in the future but I just don't get why moving him up front behind the driver wasn't an option.