TTC #2 but DH.... HELP!!!

[faith2015]

So let me just start off saying that this is an extremely excited time for my dh and I. I came into this marriage with a 5 year old, so we are TTC my dh #1.

We have been trying for about 6 months now and noticed that I couldn't O. So my ob put me on clomid, and now I am 100% O'ing

This is my second cycle on clomid, keep in mind that my OB will only allow me to be on it for a total of 3 cycles.

I am currently on CD14 with + OPK yesterday(CD13) and this morning(CD14). We tried BD on CD12 but he went soft. The next morning (CD13) I woke him up to BD and he shot a blank. Last night CD13 he shot a blank again. By this time I am starting to feel like he is the issue and when I try to talk to him about it he freaks out on me. His words are, I feel pressured to perform (wow low ball way to make your wife feel awesome. Kinda makes me think then why the hell are we TTC when you feel this way or better yet, do I not turn you on????).

I am just wondering if anyone else is in my shoes and has advice for me. I got a high peak window smiley face this morning so tonight I am wanting to "try" again. But 2 things are going through my head.

1. I O'd this morning and BD wouldn't matter.
2. He shoots a blank again.

What do I do? Have some drinks with him to ease his mind to take the "pressure" off?

I am so heart broken

 

[Luxoire]

So let me just start off saying that this is an extremely excited time for my dh and I. I came into this marriage with a 5 year old, so we are TTC my dh #1.

We have been trying for about 6 months now and noticed that I couldn't O. So my ob put me on clomid, and now I am 100% O'ing

This is my second cycle on clomid, keep in mind that my OB will only allow me to be on it for a total of 3 cycles.

I am currently on CD14 with + OPK yesterday(CD13) and this morning(CD14). We tried BD on CD12 but he went soft. The next morning (CD13) I woke him up to BD and he shot a blank. Last night CD13 he shot a blank again. By this time I am starting to feel like he is the issue and when I try to talk to him about it he freaks out on me. His words are, I feel pressured to perform (wow low ball way to make your wife feel awesome. Kinda makes me think then why the hell are we TTC when you feel this way or better yet, do I not turn you on????).

I am just wondering if anyone else is in my shoes and has advice for me. I got a high peak window smiley face this morning so tonight I am wanting to "try" again. But 2 things are going through my head.

1. I O'd this morning and BD wouldn't matter.
2. He shoots a blank again.

What do I do? Have some drinks with him to ease his mind to take the "pressure" off?

I am so heart broken

Aww hun so sorry to hear that...DH and I definitely had a bit of this when we first started to ttc #1 and I decided after the first cycle I wasn't going to mention it to him again. . So he wouldn't know when I was O or not and tey to act as naturalas possible..that way he ddoesn't feel it's only bcos of the baby that I want him..and i used this forum to let it all out...lol...see how it goes tonight hun and if it doesn't get better then perhaps try my method...iddon't talk to my dh about O etc...he might noticean Iincrease me me dtd everyday and clock on..but I don't want him to feel under pressure or used...It must be hard for them too....hope you catch this month hun..if not..then maybe try this for next cycle. ..xxx

 

[faith2015]

So let me just start off saying that this is an extremely excited time for my dh and I. I came into this marriage with a 5 year old, so we are TTC my dh #1.

We have been trying for about 6 months now and noticed that I couldn't O. So my ob put me on clomid, and now I am 100% O'ing

This is my second cycle on clomid, keep in mind that my OB will only allow me to be on it for a total of 3 cycles.

I am currently on CD14 with + OPK yesterday(CD13) and this morning(CD14). We tried BD on CD12 but he went soft. The next morning (CD13) I woke him up to BD and he shot a blank. Last night CD13 he shot a blank again. By this time I am starting to feel like he is the issue and when I try to talk to him about it he freaks out on me. His words are, I feel pressured to perform (wow low ball way to make your wife feel awesome. Kinda makes me think then why the hell are we TTC when you feel this way or better yet, do I not turn you on????).

I am just wondering if anyone else is in my shoes and has advice for me. I got a high peak window smiley face this morning so tonight I am wanting to "try" again. But 2 things are going through my head.

1. I O'd this morning and BD wouldn't matter.
2. He shoots a blank again.

What do I do? Have some drinks with him to ease his mind to take the "pressure" off?

I am so heart broken

Aww hun so sorry to hear that...DH and I definitely had a bit of this when we first started to ttc #1 and I decided after the first cycle I wasn't going to mention it to him again. . So he wouldn't know when I was O or not and tey to act as naturalas possible..that way he ddoesn't feel it's only bcos of the baby that I want him..and i used this forum to let it all out...lol...see how it goes tonight hun and if it doesn't get better then perhaps try my method...iddon't talk to my dh about O etc...he might noticean Iincrease me me dtd everyday and clock on..but I don't want him to feel under pressure or used...It must be hard for them too....hope you catch this month hun..if not..then maybe try this for next cycle. ..xxx

I like your idea. I just hope tonight is different!! We plan on taking the little one bowling, so maybe we will get a pitcher of beer tonight and get a little so his mind is clear.

I am just in complete shock, like really all the other times in our 3 years you are perfectly normal blowing large loads (TMI) and of course as soon as we get a + OPK he blows nothing.

 

[MissOleiane]

This happened when i was on clomid also. DH felt pressured to perform and we lost a cycle because he couldn't do it. I was so, so mad (clomid turned me into a raging b!tch), but i did like Luxoire and didn't tell him about ovulation anymore.

We conceived on my 3rd month on clomid.

I wish you good luck!

 

[faith2015]

This happened when i was on clomid also. DH felt pressured to perform and we lost a cycle because he couldn't do it. I was so, so mad (clomid turned me into a raging b!tch), but i did like Luxoire and didn't tell him about ovulation anymore.

We conceived on my 3rd month on clomid.

I wish you good luck!

MissOleiane - that is a bummer to hear, but its also awesome to hear, tonight is the last night for dtd before ttw, 1dpo should be tomorrow or sunday. so next month i will take both of your advice and just not say a word.

But it will be sooooo hard, because I am a raging bitch on clomid also I guess ill just have to vent to you guys!

 

[Bee Bee]

My DH also had the same issue when we first started TTC. It was a mental block he was having because he knew he had to perform. I know you guys are on a time crunch but it does get better with time. He is now ready to go whenever we need it and doesn't get as much in his head about it.

Honestly, I would suggest getting a cock ring lol. It helped my DH when he was going soft.

 

[Mom2sam]

I conceived ds with clomid but only when i used preseed too as clomid will help you ovulate but will dry up cm also i think in your situation it'l keep the sperm alive longer too so even he isn't in the mood once you get an opk few days before will still count too.
Just thought i'd mention because they only gave me clomid for 12 cycles too saying iui was next step & i conceived in the last 12 cycle only one i used preseed every time we bd anyway good luck & hopefully he gets his act together lol they dont get how much stress we go through

 

[faith2015]

My DH also had the same issue when we first started TTC. It was a mental block he was having because he knew he had to perform. I know you guys are on a time crunch but it does get better with time. He is now ready to go whenever we need it and doesn't get as much in his head about it.

Honestly, I would suggest getting a cock ring lol. It helped my DH when he was going soft.

Bee Bee, so we have one!! And I think I get more fun out of it then he does heheh

So March is going to be a new month for me. I am going to do some stuff differently. We shall see if it works!

 

[faith2015]

I conceived ds with clomid but only when i used preseed too as clomid will help you ovulate but will dry up cm also i think in your situation it'l keep the sperm alive longer too so even he isn't in the mood once you get an opk few days before will still count too.
Just thought i'd mention because they only gave me clomid for 12 cycles too saying iui was next step & i conceived in the last 12 cycle only one i used preseed every time we bd anyway good luck & hopefully he gets his act together lol they dont get how much stress we go through

I didnt buy preseed I bought conceiveplus, I am kinda hoping they are the same.

 

[flowergirl7]

My DH had a problem too. He felt like it wasn't spontaneous and he felt pressured conceiving our first. So I lit some candles and put on lingerie. That seem to help Plus, FYI, I love Preseed! It's the best lubricant. Made things a little more fun Good luck to you!

 

[Bee Bee]

My DH also had the same issue when we first started TTC. It was a mental block he was having because he knew he had to perform. I know you guys are on a time crunch but it does get better with time. He is now ready to go whenever we need it and doesn't get as much in his head about it.

Honestly, I would suggest getting a cock ring lol. It helped my DH when he was going soft.

Bee Bee, so we have one!! And I think I get more fun out of it then he does heheh

So March is going to be a new month for me. I am going to do some stuff differently. We shall see if it works!

Oh good! They do help actually on his end! It's saved us a few times when he's had troubles.

 

[faith2015]

My DH also had the same issue when we first started TTC. It was a mental block he was having because he knew he had to perform. I know you guys are on a time crunch but it does get better with time. He is now ready to go whenever we need it and doesn't get as much in his head about it.

Honestly, I would suggest getting a cock ring lol. It helped my DH when he was going soft.

Bee Bee, so we have one!! And I think I get more fun out of it then he does heheh

So March is going to be a new month for me. I am going to do some stuff differently. We shall see if it works!

Oh good! They do help actually on his end! It's saved us a few times when he's had troubles.

So how are things going with you? You currently on CD6?

 

[Bee Bee]

I am! I had a chemical last month, which sucked. But I am going to be taking femara again this cycle along with HCG trigger and progesterone. I think my problem is that the baby isn't "sticking" due to low progesterone late cycle so hopefully the progesterone should help that issue.

How is your cycle going? O:

 

[faith2015]

I am CD1 and the witch is wicked! !!! Ugh! I start my 3rd round of clomid sunday. We will see how this works! Fx'd that 3rd times a charm. Clomid has been nothing but awesome with my body (minus the horrible symptoms) it has been helping me O. So the DH is next to give a sample.
My DD was conceived with no issues, i did have a c-section though.

 

[Bee Bee]

I am CD1 and the witch is wicked! !!! Ugh! I start my 3rd round of clomid sunday. We will see how this works! Fx'd that 3rd times a charm. Clomid has been nothing but awesome with my body (minus the horrible symptoms) it has been helping me O. So the DH is next to give a sample.
My DD was conceived with no issues, i did have a c-section though.

Yeah, I have been doing well on Femara. No side effects at all, minus it messing with my temps when i take it.

I've gotten pregnant on it, but just need it to stick, and in the right place. My ectopic was conceived on my second round of femara.

 

[faith2015]

I am CD1 and the witch is wicked! !!! Ugh! I start my 3rd round of clomid sunday. We will see how this works! Fx'd that 3rd times a charm. Clomid has been nothing but awesome with my body (minus the horrible symptoms) it has been helping me O. So the DH is next to give a sample.
My DD was conceived with no issues, i did have a c-section though.

Yeah, I have been doing well on Femara. No side effects at all, minus it messing with my temps when i take it.

I've gotten pregnant on it, but just need it to stick, and in the right place. My ectopic was conceived on my second round of femara.

Oh man that must have been tough! Well baby dust to us both!!

 

[Bee Bee]

I am CD1 and the witch is wicked! !!! Ugh! I start my 3rd round of clomid sunday. We will see how this works! Fx'd that 3rd times a charm. Clomid has been nothing but awesome with my body (minus the horrible symptoms) it has been helping me O. So the DH is next to give a sample.
My DD was conceived with no issues, i did have a c-section though.

Yeah, I have been doing well on Femara. No side effects at all, minus it messing with my temps when i take it.

I've gotten pregnant on it, but just need it to stick, and in the right place. My ectopic was conceived on my second round of femara.

Oh man that must have been tough! Well baby dust to us both!!

Well, the point of that statement is that it didn't take long to get pregnant so Im sure you'll get there soon as well!