Twins and I need support

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by bek74, Dec 9, 2009.

  1. bek74

    bek74 Mum of 5

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    Am I abnormal???? Everyone that has found out they are having twins seem so excited and happy and others are just over the moon for them.

    I don't feel that way. I am happy that I have 2 little beans inside of me and am praying they both keep growing strong as I wouldn't want anything to happen to either bean.

    However I am scared, I am scared of caring for two at once, all the double cots, car seats, expenses etc etc, I'm scared I won't be able to handle two and I have older children to help me. I am worried about how much will change in our lives and wonder if I will be able to do it. I am feeling all this and am still that bit excited deep down (am I making sense).

    I am also scared they will come really premi, on average twins are born at around 35wks and they recommend taking things easy from around 24-28wks, I have 3 children I am not sure how much rest I can get, with school stuff and footy training etc. yes hubby helps but it is a two man team raising 3 boys. yet I want to give my bubs the best chance and I want to get them as far along as I can. I have all these fears of premi, under weight etc etc.

    Please ladies tell me all that I am feeling is normal because I just don't feel like jumping up and down and carrying on about the excitment of twins like most of all the other ladies are. I am feeling guilty for not carrying on with excitment like the others.

    Please don't take my post like I am not thankful for my blessings growing inside of me, because I am, I have been ttc for 3yrs so I am more than thankful for what I have, I'm just scared....

    Thanks for reading
     
  2. Mrs A

    Mrs A Mumma & TTC #2

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    Breathe. Everything will be ok, it will work out in the end it always does :) xxxx
     
  3. nada87

    nada87 Well-Known Member

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    don't feel bad, you are entitled to your own feelings. i can understand how you are feeling. twins are a huge deal and it's even harder when you have older kids becuz you still have to be there for them. i can honestly say if i found out i was having twins i would cry. it doesn't mean you love them less then other people or that you aren't greatfull it just means your human.
     
  4. Lownthwaite

    Lownthwaite 1DD and cooking #2!

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    Aww dont worry bek - its natural to feel nervous and scared even! Its a big event! I am a twin myself and have seen my mum and dad raising me and my sister and it is different than having a singleton child but it is worth it. :happydance:

    No one will think less of you for being apprehensive and worried - anyone would be! Try not to worry and if you need a kind ear send me a message. :hugs::hugs: x x x
     
  5. ladypotter

    ladypotter Three Girls!!!

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    I am one of the ones that was definately excited. A total surprise as we were not on any fertility meds. However, I am ALWAYS nervous as is my DH about the costs, and care that it will take with two. Seriously reconsidering my lifestyle about now. I have spent the last 10 years to finish my Masters Degree and build my career and feel like I am about to head into being a full time mom. Not that that isn't a great job mind you, but I have put so much effort into my career and building that part of my life, I will feel like I have wasted so much time if I do.

    I am also worried about the early arrival of these babies. I am scared stiff of every little bump along the road worrying that I am going to do something to bring them out early. I am just going to trust in God that he will take care of me and the babies and do what is best for them. that's all I can do really (besides the obvious of taking care of myself).

    I also have a 6 1/2 year old at home and am trying to get her to understand that life is about to change for all of us. Not an easy task when she has been an only child for sooo long!!! good luck to you and keep in touch....we can lean on each other for support!!!
     
  6. nosaby

    nosaby Pregnant with first

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    Totally normal. We don't know yet if we're having twins but it's a serious possibility so we've been talking about it. Just try to remember that people have been raising twins for a long time and have done just fine. I even knew a single mother that had 2 sets of twins AND 3 other kids. I always think about her when I feel overwhelmed with the idea.

    Good luck!
     
  7. mommy2kaleigh

    mommy2kaleigh Mom to 1, expecting twins

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    OH hun I feel exactly like you do! It's getting a little better as I'm getting used to the idea of having twins...and after having a big scare...they thought I was having Mono Mono twins, I'm coming to realise what a blessing it is! I never in my life would have thought I would ever have twins! So I think the shock is what is making it so hard for me. I was so prepared for one more...not two...so now I have all kinds of other things to worry about! lol
     
  8. NeyNey

    NeyNey Love My IVF Munchkin

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    Wow hunni, this is the first I've heard you're expecting Twins - I dont' blame you being frightened, that sounds completely normal. But us women are amazing creatures, we always seem to find a way, even when it seems impossible. I believe you're going to be fine hun....You'll do what you need to do to get by

    :hugs:
     
  9. bek74

    bek74 Mum of 5

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    I only found out yesterday honey. I know I had two embryo's put back in, so you would think I would have been prepared for twins, but since I am almost 36 the Dr thought putting two in would increase my chances of having one, so I thought ' yep I am having one'
    I think it is the shock, I am excited and feel extremely blessed but also very overwhelmed.
    I went out this moring to find a book on expecting twins and there was nothing, not a book:growlmad: Most pregnancy book mention twins, maybe if your lucky you will get two pages on expecting twins, but I wanted a book with questions and answers and a guide to what I could expect.
    I was disappointed to find nothing.

    So happy to see you here in First tri :hugs: :hugs:
     
  10. Kelly9

    Kelly9 Well-Known Member

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    Wow twins hey! I must have missed this to. You have done wonderfully with 3 boys I know you can do this. Take a few deep breaths. It will come to you you'll see.
     
  11. venusrockstar

    venusrockstar ~Aspiring Photographer~

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    I think you are perfectly normal. All the things you have listed would scare me as well if I found out I was having twins. I think it would come as a big shock to me, but I'm sure once they are born you will find a good routine that works for you and all will be fine.
     
  12. bek74

    bek74 Mum of 5

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    Oh thankyou so much for the book links. I contacted Borders and they have the first book you listed in stock :happydance: I shall go pick it up tomorrow.

    Thankyou so much for taking the time to find some for me :hugs::hugs:
     
  13. Parkep

    Parkep Very happy mom

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    Oh hun if i was in your shoes id be pooing a brick!! But remember once they get here it will all be worth it hun. I know in my heart that you can handle it, and everything will be just fine :hugs:
     
  14. Katherine

    Katherine Well-Known Member

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    I totally understand you. I am having one, and I am getting worried also for all you have said. At least you have previous experience with babies. This is going to be my first one. I don't even know how to take care of a newborn, but I guess I will eventually learn when the time comes! :hugs:
     
  15. You have been given twins for a reason, and im sure you will be perfect at being a mummy!
    I understand where you're coming from with the expenses, im panicking about it too!
    Everything will come together, and it might just be the initial shock of having twins which is a bit daunting!
    I would be the same, but the excitement would def kick in!
    Imagine telling people you're having two babies!! Would be such a great feeling.

    You will have your midwives/docs support all the way through.

    Everything will work out perfect, im sure! xxxxxx
     

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