Ugh about ready to have a breakdown..kinda long :(

[AsEn11]

I dont know what to do anymore
My OH is being so difficult and i dont know if its hormones or what but icant take it much longer
So a little background we were good friends for years before we got together so he knows everything from my exes to the party life I had..well befoer we got together I asked if my past was going to be an issue he assured me it woudnt..I knew his wouldnt be for me since I just dont care I am a past is the past knd of person.
Anyways he has not stayed true to what he said he harrases me everyday about what I did in the past he brings up exes and is very mean about it
He will go out to the bar not answer his phone for hours then come home and yell at me and accuse me of texting exes whe nI was just in bed sleeping I DONT GET IT!! I have gotten so mad that I have packed my stuff to leave but then remember that I have a baby on the way and would like to keep my family together but how far do I go?
I tell him the comments he makes everyday piss me off and its like he forgets instantly
He stresses me out and its hard to just stay calm when it wont stop I am about ready to have a break down and I dont know what to do
Any advice..and I have tried to talk to him but he finds a pety way to turn it around on me

 

[MomPepperdine]

Usually when they do things like that its them doing it.
Butttttt when dh and I have a prob we take out a note pad and write eachother its easier for us to talk that way maybe write out how you feel and give it to him

 

[Cassie96]

Men are idiots.
They think pregnancy is easy and labours going to be a piece of cake!
I got so fed up with my boyfriend treating me like shit that I ended up leaving him November last year.
infact when i realised how emotionally abusive and unstable he was, i posted my story on here a while back in need of some help and got some good advice, now there's more important stuff to deal with, like the birth certificate, supervised visits and having him at the birth...
Anyway I'm sorry your going through this aswell, I thaught it was just me as most posts on here are about how great and supportive there partners are!
here if you ever need to talk x

 

[laceyinthesky]

It sounds like he's the one up to no good, IMO. Does he usually only start fighting with you after he's been to the bar and is intoxicated? You guys should talk about it when he's good and sober. Let him know that he is only pushing you away and that he could lose his family if things don't change. If he doesn't or doesn't seem to care you and your baby don't deserve to be stuck living in that situation. Kids are very intuitive and will know if you are unhappy.

 

[bassdesire]

I'd be questioning him honestly.

 

[jasminejo24]

is he totally happy to be a daddy?
is he worried about you and your / baby's safety?

i know men can get post natal depression i duno about ante natal depression.

prehapse he is having a hard time dealing with being a dad, your hormones, getting things ready for the baby or what he is going to be like when you are in labour.

ask him if he is ok if there is anything like this he wants to talk about and if it isnt any of these things then he needs to stop being a jerk and get of your back. tell him youll support him if he is having a hard time but that he is making a hard time for you and you need his support too.

honestly if he isnt worried about anything to do with the baby and he isnt depressed or feeling uneasy because of being a dad then he needs to stop being an arse!

 

[AsEn11]

OH I have questioned him and it gets turned around on me..I have my doubts about him but am trying not to assume anything..I ask him and he tells me he would never cheat on me or do anything to put our relationship in jeopardy.
I dont think he is depressed I think he is adjusting to growing up..he has a couple kids already so he knows everything about pregnancy (also so annoying) but his youngest is 11 so he is starting all over..it took him awhile to come around but he talks to my belly and tells her he loves her..I guess it will take time to see how it plays out but I dont feel like myself and I have cut everyone out just so he cant make remarks to me about friends or anything..it is ridiculous but very important to make this work. I think if we were on the same page it would be great its just a difficult time..and he better not be guikty of anything because if ihave learned anything about pregnancy it is i am a scary person if you make me mad lol and I would kill him..well not really but I would make his life hell lol thank you ladies

 

[amjon]

Sounds like he's being unfaithful. I had an ex that constantly accused me of cheating when he had no reason to suspect anything. I would catch him chatting with girls online and he would try to hide it. I do have guy friends I talk to online, but I've never tried to hide it and he had met many of them and told him he could meet anyone he wanted. He never offered the same of the girls he chatted with. I ended up finding solid evidence he was cheating and he STILL tried to deny it. It's so much better to have him completely out of my life.

 

[Misslatino]

I don't think it necessarily means he's being unfaithful. He's just insecure. My OH also has issues with my past and at times it's hard for him to not be mad about that. Just like I bring up the dumb bitch he left me in the parking lot for before we even started dating years ago when I'm feeling super hormonal lol. But it's harder to deal with the comments about my past now that I'm pregnant and although he's gotten MUCH better, sometimes something will remind him of my ex and it will come out. He apologizes and eventually I get over it but it hurts in the moment and I start thinking how stupid could I be to start a family with someone who can't let the past go blah blah blah. Then it hits me all the amazing things he's done for me. Like move 2,100 miles away from his family, friends and life so that I could have my mom around during my first pregnancy. I'm sure your OH has done nice things for you as well. When you feel like your about to break focus on his good attributes! If it only happens when he's drinking ask who he is out drinking with. Maybe he went to the bar with a pal who felt the need to talk about his gf cheating on him and it put ideas in your oh's mind. If you don't feel like he's cheating then don't assume the worst that will only stress you out more and as I'm sure you already know that's not good for you and your baby girl.

Hope it all works out Hun. Feel free to private message me if you need to. Like I said, I know what it feels like to have your past brought up constantly by someone you love.

 

[AsEn11]

Ya I dont think he is beng unfaithfull..or I hope not I dont even want to think about that because then I will have crazy things going thru my head.
I think he may be insecure and ialways remind him I am pregnant why would a guy even want to talk to me lol then he tells me iam still hot and guys dont care lol its kinda funny
I just dont get it if anything I should be the one being jelouse!
And when he goes out it is usually to his buddies or by himself or he will meet up with a friend he knows I would be upset if he was drinking with a girl alone and he always invites me but i would rather not be in a smokey bar with drunk people haha
and your right I need to look at the good..he does a lot of great things but then ruins them by comparing himself to things in my past or asking me did so and so do this blah blah blah honestly I am learning a lot of self control by keeping myself calm plus I dont want to give him a reaction because ithink thats what he is trying for..but I have 9 weeks left and if he is still being this way after she comes i think I will have to think real hard about what to do because I want her in a happy calm environment not a hectic one.
Its hard because I adore his kids and they love me and I want to keep us all together forever so I really hope everything works out