Unplanned Pregnancies?

[Annama]

I just found out today that I'm 5 weeks and something days pregnant. My period was late and I felt nauseous a few times today. I suspected for a few days and finally got 2 tests today which were both positive.
I wasn't expecting this and I'm not really sure what I am doing/what I should do.
I'm in a serious relationship and I'm 27... but I just started going back to University again to finish my BA. I spent some years traveling so I feel like I'm behind on life compared to other people my age. I'm living with my boyfriend in a house with roommates. We are planning on moving in the next month, but now with this happening I feel disappointed with myself for letting it happen unplanned and not being where I feel like I should be in life. I am not sure how I'm going to handle this.

Is anyone else in a similar situation?

 

[ShelbyLC]

Firstly, congratulations!

I'm not in your situation right now, but I was in a similar situation a year and a half ago. My first pregnancy was not planned and we were definitely not in an ideal place to have a baby (or two!) but things worked out. You have to work with what life gives you. A baby doesn't mean you can't go back to school. A baby just means you have to work harder when you go back to school.

First and foremost, call your doctor. Book an appointment to get your pregnancy confirmed and start taking vitamins. Make a list of things you need to do in the next 8 months. It's going to seem like a big list, but it will help you sort things out and figure out where to start.

Drink lots of water. Rest when you can. You might want to talk to someone you're close to - your mom, a sibling, a friend - for support. Don't stress out too much. Life has a way of working things out.

Welcome to BNB and feel free to ask as many questions or vent as often as you want.

 

[Skywalker]

I just found out today that I'm 5 weeks and something days pregnant. My period was late and I felt nauseous a few times today. I suspected for a few days and finally got 2 tests today which were both positive.
I wasn't expecting this and I'm not really sure what I am doing/what I should do.
I'm in a serious relationship and I'm 27... but I just started going back to University again to finish my BA. I spent some years traveling so I feel like I'm behind on life compared to other people my age. I'm living with my boyfriend in a house with roommates. We are planning on moving in the next month, but now with this happening I feel disappointed with myself for letting it happen unplanned and not being where I feel like I should be in life. I am not sure how I'm going to handle this.

Is anyone else in a similar situation?

First of all, congratulations!

I'm not in the exact same situation, but similar! I'm 28, was having a rocky time with this relationship and I became pregnant unexpectedly. He was not very happy when I told him but I basically made the decision that even though this is not a "good time" right now for a baby, I'm going to have this baby, and what's more, I decided that I am going to have this baby with or without him. I told him that I wanted to ideally do it with him and work on our relationship so that we can stay together and we went and got help and have been working things through, and it's going well so far. I'm actually living in another country, 8,000 miles away from most of my friends and family, so that adds another layer of weirdness to the situation. But what's funny is that this baby has actually brought about a lot of solutions, because problems that I had before I was pregnant that I just tolerated or put on the back burner HAD to now be confronted and solved, so this baby is helping me get my act together. I had always intuitively felt that there wasn't ever going to be a "good time" or "best time" to get pregnant. For me, it was not the best time or the best situation, but this baby is coming and she will be loved and cared for! And I am so excited even though I'm scared poopless (or maybe that's just my constipation? Har har har) It's terrifying, but it's exciting. I hope you come to some decision and peace within yourself because when you do, you'll feel so much more calm. It can be a massive mental curve ball to learn you're pregnant when you're not expecting it. It definitely shocked me and stunned me and made me feel brain dead for a while, like a week, after I found out, but I started to have my mental faculties returned to me and I've been getting excited (in between moaning and complaining about first trimester symptoms lol) Welcome to the boards, and congrats again!

 

[steph.]

My first wasnt planned. Me and my now hubby had only been together 6 months, but shes the best thing that ever happened to us. Theres never a perfect time to have a baby, but everything will work out in the end. Good luck and congratulations!

 

[everdreaming]

Congratulations

I found out I was pregnant just a few weeks ago and the FOB wants absolutely nothing to do with us. Although it's terrifying and difficult, I am intending to do it regardless of his involvement.

It can come as a right shock, and really there's nothing I can say to give you the right or wrong decision. It's entirely up to you. Some women go on to live their lives after the kids are all grown up, others prefer to get through their own hopes and dreams first before kids. It's all a personal decision. Good luck

 

[MrsN]

Congratulations!

This pregnancy wasnt planned either. I pretty much have no room in our house for another child, but we'll cope. When I first found out I was (sounds horrible) gutted, our last baby was meant to be just that, our last! But sometimes nature decides that things are meant to be, so here we are again. I havent really let myself think about where its going to sleep etc, but I'm a great believer in things happen for a reason, so this is obviously what were meant to do.
I'm slowly getting used to the idea, although as I have no symptoms what so ever, I am finding it a bit harder to believe it still. (although the 13 tests, inc 4 digis kind of prove it is real!) I found the hb on my doppler this morning so I know its definitely happening, and I'm sure the more the pregnancy progresses I'll feel better, just like I'm sure you will.
Everyone on here are so helpful and supportive, you'll be just fine

Good luck xx

 

[Desi's_lost]

Neither of my pregnancies were planned, but you figure it out. It's always worth while!

 

[mommysurpriss]

None of my kiddos (4) were planned and this new one was def a surprise.
I'm not in the same situation as you are but I will say that having had 5 unplanned pregnancies- all turned out well and I have a very rich life.
I'm obviously just a horrible planner.
Don't worry so much about not being where you want to be. Motherhood has a way of motivating you so that you accomplish more than you ever thought you could.
Congratulations!

 

[Annama]

Thanks everyone for the non-judgemental support. I guess you're right that it may never be the perfect time, even though I imagined it differently. I still haven't decided what I should do but I appreciate these stories. They are encouraging. Thank you.

 

[WantingABubba]

Hi sweetie, sorry you're having trouble

Like many of the ladies on here, my baby was completely unplanned and I found out two weeks before I got my coveted, much wanted and hard worked place in a very good Uni.

Since getting pregnant, I have decided to carry on with my degree and work around bring pregnant/being a Mum, hoping for the best. I have also been made homeless by my mother, have had little support around me and to top it off, FOB turned his back on us the day I got the bfp!

Despite all this, I think it will be okay in the end, and you will be too. You always find a way to make it work. It is hard to come to terms with at the moment, but once baby is here, you slot them in and then you can't imagine life without them.

We are all here for you. This forum is generally a lovely and supportive place xx

P.S - congrats!

 

[Annama]

Edited and closed by moderator - please read the forum rules

While BabyandBump tries to remain pro-choice on most subjects, out of respect for majority of our members that are either trying to conceive, or pregnant, we ask that you do not discuss topics on abortion and terminations outside of the 'Ethical Prenatal Losses' forum.