Urgent!! What do I DO?!!

[Irishmum]

Hey folks!

So today I've come upon a big one. Something that has the potential to happen to any of us but I guess I just thought I would see it coming.

My OH and I have been going out for over a year, since Alex was about 18 months old. He is great and very understanding of my and Alex's relationship. I made it very clear from that beginning that just because Alex's dad is completely out of the picture it doesn't mean I'm looking for a Daddy for her. He was perfectly happy with that and took on the roll of just being her friend.

The last few days Alex has been talking alot about the word 'Dad' etc. This morning Alex promptly informed me that my OH is her dad. I was stopped in my tracks tbh! I didn't know how to react. But she has now said it more than once today.

Im not quiet sure how to approach the stituation with her. Or how to explain it to my OH. I dont want to make Alex feel like its wrong to say the word. And I also dont want my OH to feel pressured into accepting her calling him that.

Have any of you had similar situations. Or can offer any advice?

Anything is appreciated

Thanks
Irish

 

[purpledahlia]

Hmmm im not sure, Maybe ask your OH what he would prefer to be called, either his name, special nickname for the 2 of them, or something else..

Maybe just tell her, ''Thats not daddy, Thats ....'' and keep just saying that.. ? im not sure..

 

[mskellydenise]

I think you should have a conversation about the situation with your OH...Im sure he most care for her deeply if he's around her all the time...She a baby and its natural for her to think he's her dad if her biological father is completely out of the pic and your OH has taken on this role.

 

[Kacie]

I wonder about this one too.. although it's a long way off for me and a bit of a dream. As FOB is still in the picture he is obviously 'Daddy' so my boyfriend is just his name.. I guess that makes it easier. But if FOB ever leaves the picture or I have more children with BF and they start calling him 'Daddy' I guess it becomes more complicated and likely that DD will want to discuss it at some point.

How do you feel about it?

I think if DD suddenly said she was calling OH, 'Dad' I may be a bit selfish with it and feel like I am all she needs and why does she need to call him Dad. Maybe that's silly and I would get past it but it wouldn't probably be my gut reaction.

But it does show that she likes him and wants to call him Dad so that must be a good thing?

Talk it over with him and your Daughter and see how you feel.

Hope it works out

xxxx

 

[littlekitten8]

I guess the easiest thing to do is sit down with OH and ask his feelings on this. My niece has a different father to my nephew and originally called him Simon....then when my nephew was born and he was called daddy for him, she started calling him daddy simon.....now she calls him daddy. She is nearly 5 and she says 'I'm lucky. I have 2 daddies.' If you don't want LO to call OH daddy then just gently correct her and she will soon get used to calling him by whatever you decide.