Urghh think I'll be staying away from first tri section

[SarahJane]

It depends on how you interpret things.

Couldn't agree more, we all deal with things differently and there is no right or wrong, it is all about getting through and we will all have our own coping mechanisms

 

[MaevesMummy]

OK here's my call on this. I agree with both points of view!!

From a perspective of a mum who has never suffered a 2nd tri loss, it is a good thing to be positive. It is good to see that statistics prove that miscarriage is unlikely. It is right not to worry as the reality is that M/C doesn't happen to everyone.

From my perspective on the other hand, a mum who delivered a baby who had died after a 7 and a half hour labour(plus 2 early losses), the statistics hurt. I mean they REALLY hurt. What the stats say to me is that I am a minority, I am one of the "unlucky ones" who people feel sorry for. I am the 0.5%. It is bad enough to be known in real life as "that poor girl who lost her baby" but to also see it on a forum hurts like hell.

It is true that people shouldn't worry, the reality is that after 12 weeks I didn't worry at all with Evelyn. But the sad truth is that it DOES happen to 0.5% or 1 in 200 people and we are in that statistic. It is that which hurts me as I will never ever be able to relax in pregnancy again.

Having said all of that, I do not begrudge anyone the right to relax and be happy in pregnancy. I don't want another person on Earth to feel the way I do on a daily basis. If a positive thread makes one more person relaxed then let them have it but i will avoid at all costs when I am pregnant

Hugs and congrats to all of the mum to be's - I hope you have a very uneventful and healthy 9 months xxxx

I think I understand what you are saying, yes the statistics offer me no comfort either lovley. I mean after all what does it mean when you have been that 1%? You have been pregnant and 100% of the time you have lost your beloved baby. xxxxxx

 

[daopdesign]

I don't know if the statistics are actually right seeing as when you read all the pregnancy development stages online you can guarantee every single one says that after 12 weeks the risk of m/c is 1%. To be honest, I reckon it's a bit more than this and until it happened to me mid term I couldn't quite believe how many woman were going through the same thing as I was and at around the same time. At first I felt like a freak that had let my baby down (we never found out why it happened).

It's sad that every time I go to visit my boy's memorial there is always 2,3 maybe even 4 new plots filled

But yes you have to move on. I don't feel worried or even stressed now I'm pregnant again, I guess I have just accepted that what will be will be. It's like I've said to my partner, if we can deal with what we did in June then we can cope with anything.

Congrats CelticStar, we're pretty close

 

[Nikki_d72]

Hey congrats, daopdesign!

 

[CelticStar]

Congratulations daopdesign! Here's to a healthy and happy nine months for you

And thank you!

 

[Hellylou]

Congrats daopdesign and Celticstar!

Wishing you both a happy healthy 8 more months

 

[Andypanda6570]

I don't know if the statistics are actually right seeing as when you read all the pregnancy development stages online you can guarantee every single one says that after 12 weeks the risk of m/c is 1%. To be honest, I reckon it's a bit more than this and until it happened to be mid term I couldn't quite believe how many woman were going through the same thing as I was and at around the same time. At first I felt like a freak that had let my baby down (we never found out why it happened).

It's sad that every time I go to visit my boy's memorial there is always 2,3 maybe even 4 new plots filled

But yes you have to move on. I don't feel worried or even stressed now I'm pregnant again, I guess I have just accepted that what will be will be. It's like I've said to my partner, if we can deal with what we did in June then we can cope with anything.

Congrats CelticStar, we're pretty close

Almost every time I go to the cemetery I see a new grave, it breaks me inside I know we need to move on, the thing is people who have NEVER been through this can talk all they want, they will never know how hard it is to "Move On" from loosing your child . Everything was fine with me not one indication and then she was gone, it is easy for people to tell us not to worry but if I do get pregnant I will worry and that worry will never leave me. But that is me.
XOXOOX I agree with everything you have said.XOXOOO

 

[daopdesign]

I don't know if the statistics are actually right seeing as when you read all the pregnancy development stages online you can guarantee every single one says that after 12 weeks the risk of m/c is 1%. To be honest, I reckon it's a bit more than this and until it happened to be mid term I couldn't quite believe how many woman were going through the same thing as I was and at around the same time. At first I felt like a freak that had let my baby down (we never found out why it happened).

It's sad that every time I go to visit my boy's memorial there is always 2,3 maybe even 4 new plots filled

But yes you have to move on. I don't feel worried or even stressed now I'm pregnant again, I guess I have just accepted that what will be will be. It's like I've said to my partner, if we can deal with what we did in June then we can cope with anything.

Congrats CelticStar, we're pretty close

Almost every time I go to the cemetery I see a new grave, it breaks me inside I know we need to move on, the thing is people who have NEVER been through this can talk all they want, they will never know how hard it is to "Move On" from loosing your child . Everything was fine with me not one indication and then she was gone, it is easy for people to tell us not to worry but if I do get pregnant I will worry and that worry will never leave me. But that is me.
XOXOOX I agree with everything you have said.XOXOOO

Hun, this is why I can't go in that 1st Tri section. You have all these ladies posting things about how worried they are and then you have threads telling everyone to be happy and stop thinking somethings going to go wrong. It's bloody difficult not to worry! I'm quite happy staying in the TTC and this section and fingers crossed I never have to go through a delivery like I did again but if I do, then at least I'll be more strong and prepared. And I'm sorry if anyone disagrees, but having an early m/c is a heck of alot different to a mid to late term m/c xxxxx

 

[kam78]

Congrats Ladies!!!

That is the best news I've heard in a while.... I am soooo excited for you both...and please don't "hide" from us on this site... You still better keep us updated LOL

Happy, Healthy 8 more months!!!!

 

[Nikki_d72]

Oh Congrats Celticstar as well, thought I'd said that earlier - sorry! woop-woop I'll be stalking you both xxx

 

[xAmiixLouisex]

I found out today that I'm pregnant again (I'm sorry, I won't go on about it) and while I will still have those worries until after the date I m/c'd last time (14 weeks) I am not going to let those worries spoil my enjoyment of this pregnancy or stress me out so much that I can't look back on the days before 14 weeks and remember them with happiness.

Couldn't have said it better, congratulations.