Very frustrated.

[3xpire]

I've noticed that when you become pregnant, everyone thinks they're your personal midwife, that your personal business is perfectly fine to share with the world, and that it's totally okay to point out everything they think you're doing wrong..

I THOUGHT I was doing good at keeping a smile on my face, until now.

My fiance and I live with his mother momentarily until we get into our apartment, and I've finally caught her being pretty shady here. I noticed that within the last couple of months, while OH, his mother, and I are out and about, and she sees a friend, she steps away with them, and clearly they start talking about me. I can tell from the glares, the gestures, and being super, super quiet.

I just blow it off every time usually.

Recently she started bitching to my fiance to not have him on the birth certificate in fear that the state will come after him to cover the hospital expenses for myself and our baby (I get state healthcare or Badgercare as we have it) and a lot of other things. She's been nitpicking me on what I should and shouldn't be doing, that I'm not gaining enough weight, that I'm gaining too much, that my ob doctor is stupid, that my doctors are wrong about the things theyre telling me, to ignore what my doctors say, etc.

Last night I just about blew a fuse. Me and my fiance were out getting a couple of groceries, and his mom ran into a friend and they were in the checkout directly behind us. It was really quiet as it was late at night, etc. When me and OH were getting our stuff checked out, I noticed his mom was whispering to her friend who ten seconds earlier was pretending to be all excited and happy to see us, and her friend just gave me and OH a glare and they were talking really quietly. They didn't even bother to TRY to make it less obvious. So I heard everything. His mother was basically spilling our personal lives and situation and about me having my fiance on our baby's birth certificate and having his last name..

Me and my OH both went out to the car right away and talked about it and he immediately mentioned how it really bothered him that his mom keeps pulling this kind of stuff. I really want to say something to her, but considering shes older, and her family is throwing my baby shower, I have no freaking idea how to talk to her about it without blowing a damn fuse.

Me and OH are really happy and excited for our baby, and we're trying to enjoy our pregnancy, but this is becoming WAY too much..

How in the he** do I deal with this? /:

Any of you have to deal with in laws like this?

 

[thayet]

Move out. Quickly.

Anyone who talks about your personal business to her friends, standing right in front of you, has no respect for you. I hate to say it, but since it's your OH's mother, it's really his place (with you present of course) to talk to her and tell her that both of you are uncomfortable with what she's doing. Unfortunately, if you live with her, she has you a bit over a barrel.

Just remember that once you move out, you have control over how much she sees her grandchild (if at all!) so just try to set boundaries and have her stick to them. And move out. Soon. Best of luck.

 

[3xpire]

Thanks, and yeah we're trying to move out very soon here. But this very soon is starting to feel like forever with her. It just really bothers me. She considers me like her daughter, but she can have the disrespect to go around talking about mine and my OH's personal life like it's her own x.x