Very scared of labor and delivery. This is my first..Help please :(

[babymomma37]

Hello so i am 18 weeks and have been thinking about the labor and delivery alot lately. I am TERRIFIED This is my first pregnancy and i am 17 years old, i will be 18 when im supposed to have my baby but i just can NOT picture myself with a baby... i cant see myself being a mom!! I have got myself believeing i am going to litterally DIE during the process of labor delivery...im so scared i cry!! if you have gone through this or have thought the same things i would love to hear from you. I really am scared...is it normal to think and be this way? plese help

 

[hippylittlej]

you may find people with more experience in the teen section. I can't relate unfortunately as I have waited a long time to have this baby. However my god daughter gave birth at 17 by c-section and she was fine and doing a great job. I am sure your feelings are perfectly normal and most people get scared no matter what their age.

 

[Jims_Girl]

Hugs xx
I was 20 when I had my first... I felt EXACTLY like you..... What I would advise you to do is spend the rest of your pregnancy grtting on top if your fear... You can do this
There are several ways that can help... Firstly I would stop reading negative birth stories, on this sections stickys there are some lovely positive birth stories to read which are so inspiring.... Try not to watch tv births either... If you want some lovely births to watch the YouTube hypnobirthing...
You need to teach yourself to trust your body and you can do this by relaxation, hypnobirthing, pregnancy yoga.... They really do help....
Start with simple things like that and see how you get on....
Birthing is a natural process and countless women have shown us over the years that we can birth our beautiful babies xxx

 

[paperz]

I was 27 when I got pregnant, and 28 when my baby was born. She was planned, and we got pregnant easily and quickly. And still... for the first three months (or maybe a bit more) I felt lost, scared, worried, confused... I was terrified to think that at some point I would need to give birth. I also couldn't imagine myself being a mother. I seriously wondered if having an abortion wouldn't be the best thing. I did research online and found that this can be a very normal reaction, even for people that have been trying to get pregnant for a long time. And guess what? My fear of giving birth went away completely. It just dissolved. And by the second trimester I was super excited and happy to be pregnant, feeling like I thought a normal pregnant person should feel. Please remember that your hormones are also playing a huge role in how you feel at the moment and you need to try to ride it out... It will get better Have you considered working with a doula to help you get more comfortable with the idea of giving birth? There are some that will work for free if you can't afford to pay them, or for reduced fees. Just remember that giving birth is natural and women do it all the time. Something that I really noticed after giving birth is that before going into labour I imagined birth as something that would happen to me, like a big event, but afterward I realised it was much more like something I was doing... it is not near as scary I think if you remember that you are labouring and giving birth - it's something you are doing - not something being done to you!! Speaking up about your fears is a great start to getting over them as well, so keep doing that! Ask questions and inform yourself until labour and birth are no longer scary and unknown!

 

[madasa]

I reckon it's otally normal to feel scared.... I mean, this is unknown territory for you. Culture and the media have built birth up to be something very scary.

Your body is excellently designed for birth and your baby is excellently designed to be born. When labour starts, it usually starts gently and gets more intense gradually. Each individual contraction is the same, starts off gently, more intense then tapers off towards the end. There is a rhythm to it.... The thing that helped me the most was breathing really slowly and deeply and focussing on my breath.

I recommend a doula.... she should be able to help you address your fears so that you can enjoy your pregnancy as much as possible and look forward to birth with excitement and confidence...

TRUST is a big part of it all. Trust yourself, trust that your body can and will birth. Being able to relax is key on the big day! Tension makes the process longer and more uncomfortable. Trust your gut.... your instinct.... that you can and will care for a baby.

Do you know where your local mums groups are?

Good luck. The whole shebang can be really wonderful, just make sure you have good support

 

[babymomma37]

Thanks for all of the replies. You all have actually made me feel a whole lot better! Knowing that other people have expierenced being scared makes things better for me. Thank you all and i think my fear is slowly going away!

 

[NuKe]

I can say that I was positively petrified. Completely beside myself. My waters broke at home and there was meconium so i had to go into hospital. The midwife performed an internal and told me I would be staying in to have my baby then. I vomited and nearly passed out. I was just so scared! I ended up being put on the dam drip to start contractions due to the meconium and it didnt start working for a couple of hours so i was shaking like a leaf for that whole time. Once the tightenings started however, it all went away and my body just took over. I didn't really think about anything except what was happening to my body and focusing on my breathing. I had taken my ipod and docking station and i couldnt even have told you what song was playing 90% of the time! This time I know I'll be fine and to just trust my body. xo

 

[madasa]

oh my goodness, Nuke! that does sound scary! you did so well I'm a bit surprised they put you on a drip - that means very strong contractions which can result in a distressed baby, more likely to gasp, which surely is the exact thing the drs do not want to happen, especially if there has been meconium.... I suppose it depends how long the waters have been released for or something

 

[chuck]

Think of it this way hun...you are making a human being...that's practically a super power! If you are able to make a person you can certainly get them out,!

No it is not easy but labour and birth are amazing - it's right to be scared and anxious but try to look forward to it too, you will only do each labour and birth once so try to think about it more as something that will only happen to you once so enjoy some of it.

I would suggest perhaps doing some hypnobirthing classes or get some natal hypnotherapy CD's to listen to. They help with relaxation and breathing techniques so you can focus and relax during labour.

 

[RainbowDrop_x]

I was EXACTLY the same hun.. I was terrified.. I got so hysterical sometimes that I couldn't calm down.. I actually lost sleep over my fear of labour and in all complete honesty... I can't WAIT to do it all again!!! It's really not as bad as they make it out to be.. And as soon as it's over.. You forget about it.. And whilst you're going through it.. You're not thinking about it.. I know that doesn't make sense but when you get to that point you will know what I mean.

 

[AndyyMay]

Hello so i am 18 weeks and have been thinking about the labor and delivery alot lately. I am TERRIFIED This is my first pregnancy and i am 17 years old, i will be 18 when im supposed to have my baby but i just can NOT picture myself with a baby... i cant see myself being a mom!! I have got myself believeing i am going to litterally DIE during the process of labor delivery...im so scared i cry!! if you have gone through this or have thought the same things i would love to hear from you. I really am scared...is it normal to think and be this way? plese help

I was 17 Giving Birth To My Daughter (She's 9 Months Now!)
It's Natural To Be Scared About labour ,As Someone Said it's 'Unknown Terratory'
I think everyone must get scared at some point,

my way of getting through was to be very positivie about it,I was in labour for 10.47mins and didn't have pain relief,And what got me through was the thought of seeing my daughter at the end and Concentrating on my breathing,Deeply and slowy.

I think Labour Made Out To Be Worse Thann What It Is,But Depends on the person and experiacnce some have a more traumatic labour and birth than others.

I won't Lie It Does Hurt,But It's Definatly something you can get through if you put your mind to it.

The more you stress yourself,The more your body will stress,So the longer your labour can be,
The more you can try stay calm,Your doing better for yourself,

You'll be fine,Honestly
My Best Advice Which I Went On Was Stay And Remain Calm,Try not to panic and concentrate on breathing through the contractions or something else to take your mind off it
And Take it as It comes,
And Also Enjoy! It's the birth of your little baby,A Special Moment,Look foward to it,Don't dread it

Pm me if you need a chat

take care xxx

 

[KiwiMOM]

Hey, I'm 18 and pregnant with my first, I'll be 19 when (s)he arrives

I'm a bit scared of the birth, but I know my body is designed for this purpose and if it was too hard to give birth the way we all do then humans would have evolved to give birth differently. I've found an awesome midwife who is a firm believer in natural births ( we might come to heads about this once the actual pain starts ) and is prepared to help me birth MY way as well as my Mom who is an OB/GYN and my OH will be right there with me. It makes me feel better having it all planned out and knowing what I want now. I'm more scared of having an emergency CS than the idea of the pain though lol!

PM me if you want to talk