wanting to do things right this time - sleep routine

[Tezzy]

well im wide awake because once again Rhys is taking up all the room in our bed. we co-slept with him until i got pregnant with Ffion then i tried to move him into his own room, i decorated it and bought him a new bed to tempt him but it just hasnt worked.

like many posts on here at the moment Rhys still wakes in the night. he falls asleep downstairs, then we move him into his room and he stays asleep until he realises hes on his own then he wails and we bring him into our bed.

its a complete nightmare and i wish we had never co-slept in the first place. so this time i want to do things right with Ffion, we are not co-sleeping now (2 nights so far) and im moving her cot out of our bedroom next week. tonight i gave her a bath, fed her and put her down awake in her cot but she wouldnt settle so i picked her up until she fell asleep and then i put her down.

what id like to know is...

is she too young to be put down awake?
should she nap in her cot during the day?
should she even be in a cot instead of a moses basket?
for the nightime feeds should i feed her and put her straight back down?
should i feed her in her own room or bring her into our room? (slightly warmer in ours)

and generally how do you get into a solid nightime routine?

sorry for all the questions but Rhys has always slept with us, fallen asleep on the couch and generally hasnt slept well since birth!

 

[Holldoll]

I wish I knew! I'm just starting to figure out all these questions myself. I put Bella in her crib (for her naps) just after she's fallen asleep. She's not completely asleep, just very relaxed. I'll put her in and then pat her back until she falls asleep. At night I do the same thing (but she's in a co-sleeper next to my bed), but then during the night the minute she fusses she's in bed with us. I'm starting to think that at 3 months she's going to her own room so that she doesn't wake me up the very minute she fusses.

My thinking (it's based on some things I've read - Happiest Baby) is that until 3 months I can continue to "baby" her, but after that I'm slowly going to wean her into letting her cry before picking her up, and things like that.

 

[ColtonsMom]

I agree with you decision. I've had such mixed emotions on this. When I was pregnant I was like "NO! He will NOT sleep with us" but then after I had him, thats where he ended up. Now he is almost 5 months old and will not sleep on his own and when he wakes at night (even just slightly) he will not go back to sleep on his own. I have to keep him in our bed until he falls asleep and then move him into his crib. Then he still wakes 2-3 times (not for food, just for comforting).

I'm not too sure about putting her down awake. I've heard babies younger than three months aren't able to comfort themselves.. but I think everyone believes different things. I would say try it for a few nights and if she doesn't seem to settle after awhile (and starts crying) then just wait until she is asleep.
Right now Colton still naps with me during the day. We are fixing to move wihtin the next month though and since he will have his own room then, he will be napping in his crib..
I have put Colton in his crib (cot?) since he was 3 months, although before that he co-slept so we never used his bassinet. If you have her crib and everything set up already I would probably just use it. That way she is used to it and will be used to/comfortable with her surroundings when she starts going to sleep on her own.
I would put her straight back down after night time feeds. That way she knows its still bed time and not time to get up. Colton always fell right back to sleep, sometimes in the middle of his bottle; sometimes at the end.
and finally, I would feed her in her room. Moving around too much with her will wake her more and it will be harder for her to go back to sleep when she is finished. If she seems too cold you could try keeping a blanket on her even while she eats.

Hope that helps. and Good luck!

 

[marley2580]

Hun, I really recommend 'the no-cry sleep solution' book. It gives you tips and methods for starting with a baby ffions age and can also help with getting Rhys down.

 

[Tezzy]

i do have this book.. but with 2 small children i havent had time to read it in detail!

will consult the book!

 

[lulu0504]

We co-slept with Lilia until she was about 8 weeks old as she wouldn't sleep on her back or in her moses basket. Have now managed to get her to sleep through in her own cot by perserverance. I put her in it when she is just about to fall asleep and let her find her own way to drop off and stand on the other side of the room so she was aware i'm there but not right by her or holding her and just let her soothe herself. I found that by putting her in her cot during the day for naps was encouraging her to wake up sooner as she associated it with little sleeps and would wake up and play at 5am for an hour or so like she would in the afternoon so stopped that and now she just sleeps through in her cot. A nice warm bath, massage and then a feed will always help to send a baby sleep also. When we were trying to establish Bella's sleep routine we kind of let her tell us what time she was ready for bed and it emerged that by 8 o'clock every night she was ready for bed so we start her routine between 7-7.15 and by 8 o'clock she is fast asleep now! Good luck!!

 

[KarenLV]

I bought Jo Frost's book (Supernanny) and she recommends to stop co-sleeping at 4 months and also to move the baby to it's own room at that age....Sorry,cant give you advice from experience as my little one is still snug-as-a-bug in his mommy's bed! I will probably be asking your advice in a few months time

Maybe just place her in her own crib but keep the crib in your room?

 

[xarlenex]

Ive never took kyle in as I just didnt want this to happen so we havent had problems. Some answers to ur questions..

is she too young to be put down awake? Not really, lets her get used to falling asleep by herself and not always having to be soothed to sleep.
should she nap in her cot during the day? If shes having troubling settling in her cot now, id say yes, just so she gets used to the room and being on her own.
should she even be in a cot instead of a moses basket? Its recommended 6 months before put in a cot, however many mothers put children straight in, so personal choice really.
for the nightime feeds should i feed her and put her straight back down? I would say yes, unless you want her to get really used to night feeds and always want them. I dont this with kyle and he dropped his night feeding himself at 3 months.
should i feed her in her own room or bring her into our room? (slightly warmer in ours) Your better feeding her in her room, less fuss that way and it means she will begin to understand that its not playtime.
and generally how do you get into a solid nightime routine? Stick to the same (or as close to) routine everynight. And less fuss and noise come night time. When I bring kyle out his bath I usually put his lullaby cd on, whilst changing him and feeding him then he gets swaddled and down to bed and goes to sleep himself fine (most nites)

Hope she settles fine, good luck xx

Oh and to add to this, when I first moved kyle from moses basket to cot, for the first week I sat him in the moses basket in the cot so he got used to the surroundings first, then put him down in the cot after the week, and he was fine x

 

[Sweetie]

Good reading Thanks everyone who posted

 

[missjess]

Josh co-slept with us a couple of times, never at night but sometimes in the morning and when we napped during the afternoon. Now he's gotten way too smart and there is no way I'm co-sleeping with him anymore. He had gotten insecure while sleeping and would wake up 2-3 times during the night for comfort. Now he has no problem sleeping through without waking up.

The bedtime routine is really important, babies feel secure when there is a strong routine because they know whats going to happen. Josh gets a bath every night at the same time, then a massage, a story and a bottle. Then, I swaddle him and put some lavender oil on his sheets. Every night is the same and I never have any problems with him falling asleep (he will fall asleep right after his bottle)

During the day sometimes I put him down for a little nap if he doesn't fall asleep on is own. I swaddle him and put him down into his big crib in his room. He will spend 5-10 min looking at the little animals of his mobile and fall asleep.

Personally I wouldn't keep on co-sleeping with my baby, I know friends that still co-sleep with their child and they're 6-7 yrs old. Children need to have their own room and sleep in their own bed. Though this is just my opinion.

Good luck hun, I hope this was useful xx

 

[vicky]

i got kira use to her room by doing everything in her room, got her changed, nappie changed, after her bath. things like that. i was aiming for 7 to put her to bed but she changed that two half 6 wich i don't mind what so ever, so aim for a time and stick to it. when kira used to cry i would go up stairs (not picking her up) put her dummy back in mouth, give her a kiss, then put her mobile on.