What are your thoughts on polygamy?

[Randianne]

I have no problem with consenting adults who choose to live like that.

I despise government intervention in marriage. You're making a commitment to your partner. I don't know why the government needs to be involved. Saying that two people aren't married because the government didn't allow it is insane.

 

[Eternal]

Sometimes it sounds like the perfect solution, share the load!

Seriously though, I have no issue with it if someone wants to practice it, as a Mormon I get frustrated by the fact people believe we practice it. But as for others, each to their own.

 

[PitaKat]

I can see a lot of benefits from it, like Eternal mentioned, sharing the load of life. Someone to watch the kids while you make dinner or vice versa. Or perhaps one of you watch the kids while the other sister wife goes to work and brings in more income for the household. The children have more guidance, supervision, help with homework. Parts of polygamy really appeal to me, I like the sense of community it brings to mind. But I'm sure that's looking at it through rose-tinted glasses as I know a lot of times there are issues with jealousy, sharing, and equality, and in the worst cases, abuse of the wives and children.

Having said that, I do agree with CMarie's post as I am a Christian too. I think the classic case of polygamy in the bible is Jacob marrying both Leah and Rachel. A lot of favoritism and heartache came from that marriage.

 

[summer rain]

I'm a Muslim and polygamy is allowed in my religion I know many second (and third) wives who chose that lifestyle and actually sought it out. However it isn't allowed to marry two (or more) sisters or a mother and daughter, in our religion xx

What about in the states where polygamy is illegal (a felony) - do Muslims practice it here, albeit under the radar? All living together but without legal marriage certificates? Just curious. Is it legal in the UK if it's religion-based?

There aren't many states where polygamy if the parties don't commit legal bigamy, is a felony, it's only a handful out of the 50 states most of which there aren't many Muslims living there I can think of Texas and Utah and I know there are some others. Usually it is those states with previous 'problems' with mormon polygamy in the past hence such laws often being known to this day as 'anti-mormon laws'. I know a non-Muslim family living in Washington state there is one man with two wives only one he is married to legally, according to the law in their state they are committing no crime. But as polygamy isn't a must in Islam except under some rare circumstances, then it would be considered better for Muslims living in a state where it is actively illegal to avoid getting into that situation unless they move elsewhere.

In the UK as long as you don't marry both (or more) parties in a way that is legally registered it isn't illegal to 'marry' as many people as you want because it is seen as living together, not marriage regardless of the person's religion or anything else. Adultery is also no longer illegal here as it is in some US states though it can be a grounds for divorce. So someone who lives with two women neither of whom he is married to legally, or he is legally married to only one if them, he isn't committing any crime under UK law. The UK law does recognise as legally valid polygamous marriages legally registered in countries where polygamy is legal provided that the normal residence of the parties is in that country and not in the UK. Despite how it has been reported in the press in the UK and elsewhere, married men who are UK residents or citizens cannot go and marry overseas where polygamy is legal and then bring that spouse to the UK and if they get reported or caught out they would be convicted of both bigamy and immigration fraud. Xx

 

[Kate&Lucas]

There is a difference between polygamous relationships and children being forced into marriage - the two shouldn't be discussed as a single topic.
I can understand why polygamous relationships work for some people. They're not for everyone, but it's possible to love more than one person and as long as everyone involved has respect for each other, the situation can definitely work.

 

[Jaylynne]

Personally, I could never do it. It be insanely upset at the thought of my husband sleeping with another woman or having to share him. I would think it ruins a lot of the intimacy marriages are supposed to have. On the other hand, if some willingly go into a polygamist relationship and have no mental or psychological issues then that's their call. As long as no one is forcing or hurting anyone, what's the big deal?

 

[whit.]

I don't care if other people want to do it for whatever reasons they have, it doesn't affect me what so ever.

I could never do it. I would never want to share my husband.

 

[Blueberri]

It's not my life, so who am I to decide? Yes, I do find having multiple women as your wives is kind of really outrageous but it's none of my concern to sit there and tell you otherwise. That's your choice, I'll respect it and keep my opinions to myself.

 

[lhancock90]

Each to their own, different strokes for different folks etc.
Personally, my man, is MINE.

 

[Yammas]

I think that as long as evryone is happy then good for them although I think that jealousy is natural reaction to seeing someone you love with someone else so doubt that they wouldnt get jealous from time to time.

 

[socitycourty]

i'm not religious so don't care on that front but here in the USA it is mostly illegal,and also the families take advantage of welfare/aid, even if we don't believe in it we are paying for it. any wife who is not the 1st wife can pass herself off as a single mother and collect benefits. I believe that this is wrong, and the majority of them are doing it. They were infilitrated by an FBI agent who then made a documentary about them.

It's ok to do what you want as a religious/belief/lifestyle thing but I don't think everyone should have to pay for it or go along with it.

 

[Foogirl]

It always amazes me that polygamy is a male preserve. Has there ever been a situation where a wife takes several husbands?

For that reason alone, I'm pretty much against it.

 

[Fizzyfefe]

It always amazes me that polygamy is a male preserve. Has there ever been a situation where a wife takes several husbands?

When a woman takes more than one husband, it is called polyandry. It's common in other cultures around the world.

 

[Foogirl]

It always amazes me that polygamy is a male preserve. Has there ever been a situation where a wife takes several husbands?

When a woman takes more than one husband, it is called polyandry. It's common in other cultures around the world.

Is it? Where?

 

[Fizzyfefe]

It always amazes me that polygamy is a male preserve. Has there ever been a situation where a wife takes several husbands?

When a woman takes more than one husband, it is called polyandry. It's common in other cultures around the world.

Is it? Where?

According to the Discovery Channel, it is practiced in Nepal, and according to the New World Encyclopedia, it is practiced in Tibet, Sri Lanka (although it is not legal), Kerala, and in the Amazon.

 

[summer rain]

i'm not religious so don't care on that front but here in the USA it is mostly illegal,and also the families take advantage of welfare/aid, even if we don't believe in it we are paying for it. any wife who is not the 1st wife can pass herself off as a single mother and collect benefits. I believe that this is wrong, and the majority of them are doing it. They were infilitrated by an FBI agent who then made a documentary about them.

It's ok to do what you want as a religious/belief/lifestyle thing but I don't think everyone should have to pay for it or go along with it.

The majority of polygamists in the US are not from LDS offshoots but Muslims and 'others' including various other types of Christians or those with no religion at all. You don't often hear about these other types of polygamists because the majority of them are living in states where polygamy isn't illegal in and of itself (provided that only one wife or none has been married legally), and they are not committing any type of welfare fraud whatsoever, this is why you never hear about them as they are not newsworthy. Xx

 

[Ozzieshunni]

To clarify, polygamy is not legal in any states. Utah was required to outlaw it when they joined the union.

I think polygamy gets a bad rap because of all the radical "Morman" groups that practice it. If it works for you, more power to ya

 

[summer rain]

To clarify, polygamy is not legal in any states. Utah was required to outlaw it when they joined the union.

I think polygamy gets a bad rap because of all the radical "Morman" groups that practice it. If it works for you, more power to ya

Yes, it's not 'legal' in the sense where if you marry more than two people in a civil ceremony it's ok in the eyes of the law and won't be prosecuted however there are many states where if you marry only one spouse legally or none of your spouses and you marry them purely in a religious or secular ceremony that is not legally binding then you're not committing any crime. The wives or second wife are considered as 'girlfriends' and not as wives.

There are very few states where even marrying more than one person in a purely religious sense is actually a crime and a prosecutable offence, in some states such as Utah the anti-mormon laws as they are known verge on the ridiculous, it isn't allowed for a married man to live under the same roof as another woman he could legally marry for a period of more than a year as they are considered as co-habiting and thus illegally living in polygamy. It doesn't matter if this woman is a lodger, cleaner, au pair or anything else. However it would be considered as more than one seperate household if the other woman has her own seperate kitchen! Xx

 

[summer rain]

It always amazes me that polygamy is a male preserve. Has there ever been a situation where a wife takes several husbands?

For that reason alone, I'm pretty much against it.

Polyandry does exist but it's not widespread. Evolutionary psychologists say that this is because polyandry has no advantages for women or men in terms of furthering their genes and other basic instincts but personally I don't know any women who would be interested in having more than one husband, it just doesn't appeal. I watched a documentary about a woman in Canada or the US with two 'husbands' and the men were incredibly territorial and bitchy with each other and meanwhile their squabbling wasn't helping the poor 'wife' of the trio if them in any way, emotionally or physically. Even if I wasn't Muslim I'd still have not one iota of interest in being part of a polyandrous arrangement xx

 

[PitaKat]

i'm not religious so don't care on that front but here in the USA it is mostly illegal,and also the families take advantage of welfare/aid, even if we don't believe in it we are paying for it. any wife who is not the 1st wife can pass herself off as a single mother and collect benefits. I believe that this is wrong, and the majority of them are doing it. They were infilitrated by an FBI agent who then made a documentary about them.

Really? Sounds very interesting, do you remember what it was called?