What do i do?

[Wantsababynow]

Hi, i'm 16, and when i was 15 i lost a baby, since then all i've wanted is a baby, i even got the implant to make sure i couldn't get pregnant, even if i wanted to. My boyfriend is 21, we've spoken about having a baby and he said he doesn't want one yet, i'm in college and i want to go to uni, would that be possible with a baby? how did everyones parents react at findin out you were pregnant?

 

[Becky10]

Didn't want to read and run, but I don't think I was quite in the same situation as I was 27 when I fell pregnant!

Sorry to hear about your loss, but my advice would be to wait and go to Uni first. It wont be the same experience with a baby and as you say your boyfriend isn't ready. You've got years and years to have children, so just enjoy your youth while you can. Don't mean to sound preachy or anything...just my opinion.

 

[Strawberries]

Hi there, I'm 17 and I lost a baby last year at 16 so I know how you're feeling. Every night I have to physically make myself take my pill. Personally though, I think you should wait til you've finished uni before trying. You can go to uni with a baby, but it might seriously interfere with your education and you probably would just want to spend as much time with bubs and not even go (this is just how I would feel). My boyfriend is also the one who wants to wait in our relationship and 99% of the time I'm glad he is making us wait, because I know that right now we couldn't give our baby the sort of life that we would want to.

Hope I don't sound patronising, and good luck with whatever decision you make. Although if you are waiting there are quite a few of us on her around 16ish so you're definetly not alone, and you'd fit right in! xx

 

[Amygdala]

Hey! I'm very sorry to hear about your loss. But I agree with the others here, I would give it a few years as well until you're settled and financially stable. For one thing getting an education and a job you enjoy will be A LOT easier without a baby. Believe me, even without having to care for a baby there'll be enough challenges ahead. But also look at it this way: If you have a baby now, you'll never be able to concentrate on it 100% until you have your education/finances sorted which could be years. Until your financially stable you'll always have part of you worrying about money or having to put in ling hours at uni or work to get ahead.
You're still so young and have plenty of time to get your life ready for a baby. And maybe you should think about living some of it for yourself first as well? Travel, go to gigs, make random choices off the top of your head, just because you can?

 

[GirlBlue]

Hi Wantsababynow! I am so sooorry to hear about your loss. I think while some of us might not be able to sympathize, we are all having similar feelings. That's why we're here....trying to find some way to cope with the desire to have children. I think that enjoying uni is a special time and an experience that you should not bypass. Even though lots of people have children in school, it changes the dyamic. Try your best to enjoy being able to have a blast when you are still young and healthy enough to enjoy it. After 25 you're body only tends to let you stay up/party so many nights in a row. When you're 18-24, you can do it almost everynight! LOL. Hold on to it while you can.

 

[HippyMumma23]

I had a suspected, but never proved, miscarriage when I was 16 and it tore my heart out. I was desperate for a baby for every second after that. But I stopped myself, instead I had fun, went travelling, moved away, went to festivals, went to college, went to uni, got good jobs. And for that Im so very glad I didnt give into temptation and get pregnant. And more so because babies are so, so, so hard theres no way I could have handled that at 16. I would have needed my mums help all the time to cope. Its best to be old enough and experienced enough so you can really stand on your own two feet and cope. Financially, and emotionally.

xxxx

 

[Wantsababynow]

thanks for all the messages guys, im gna talk to the man about it soon thanks for the advice, i think im gna wait till i come out of uni