What helped you when starting out

[Samantha675]

As we all know, BFing is hard work, especially at the beginning. So I thought I would start a thread and we could all write about what really helped get us through those first weeks.

For me:

Determination. Being 110% determined to BF'd my son. I had planned a home birth, and ended up transfering and having a c-section. I was sooooo disappointed, and for me BFing made me feel more in touch with my son, more bonded and just closer to being a mother.

Finding the Le Leche League. Their support group meetings are great. It is awesome to sit in a room with other mothers knowing they are going through the same thing, have been there done that, and know where you are coming from.

Just letting my son take the lead, and nursing him on demand. I didn't worry about how much he was gaining in weight, I just nursed him, and nursed him and nursed him. I trusted in my body to feed him and trusted him to know when he needed to nurse.

Getting comfy on the sofa, especially for those marathon sessions. I was able to watch movies, and just relax, and not watch the clock. I found for the first month, I usually just watched him, staring at his little perfect face.

Remembering there is a light at the end of the BFing tunnel, and it would get easier.

 

[mari72]

I was determined to succeed for very similar reasons, my plan for a natural delivery also went out the window and i had an emergency c section (there's alot of them about) so i was damn sure i was going to make the breast feeding work. I love the fact i am soley responsible for my daughter thriving and the grandmums wouldn't let me have a moment with her if i was formula feeding-ha ha.

 

[sparkswillfly]

I was losing the will to do it last week. My heart really wasnt in it. Then I went to the weigh in at the baby clinic and she had gone from the 25th centile to the 50th. I was really proud and thought I must be doing something right. It gave me the motivation to carry on.

 

[Mervs Mum]

Great idea

Commitment. I BF'd for about 6 weeks with my first and I cant even tell you why I gave up I just wished I had carried on. So this time I really wanted to give it another shot. Before she was born, I commited to feeding her from birth to Christmas which was about 8 weeks. As time went by and Christmas drew nearer, I knew I was going to carry on. I've set myself mini goals rather than saying 1 year from the start. I'm almost at 6 months and I still cant quiet believe it!

Belief in myself. Day 10 and I was seriously ready to jack in. I just didnt think she was getting enough and I couldnt listen to her cry anymore. I rang the midwife who told me to go straight to Baby Cafe. The BF advisor listened and said I the main thing I needed to do was believe in myself. I think it can never be underestimated how big a part of it self belief is.

Support. From the day I got my BFP I drummed 2 things into my hubbys head - dont let me have an epidural and dont let me give up BFing before I've given it my best shot. Fortunately he listened. His support and that of the Baby Cafe lot meant I carried on.
Support comes in many forms and for me my hubby was my biggest support. Endless pints of fizzy water and cheese on toast in those first days....god love him

And my top clothing tip for discreet BFing is Belly Bands!! Wear them under your regular tops and you can lift to feed and your tummy is covered
When you get past 12 weeks treat yourself to Underwired Nursing Bras so your boobs feel like their old selves again

 

[Chel]

I didn't see FFig as an option I was so committed.

I BF laying on my side because I couldn't sit up after my C-section.

I BF through a yeast infecton in my milk ducts!

I BF through masititis.

I have BF when it hurt so bad I was crying.

But, now I have a fabulous milk supply and a healthy totally boob crazy baby!

I think BFing is like labour - it hurts more than you could ever have imagined, but you survive it!

 

[honey08]

awwww ladies when i read ur stories i think u all deserve sommat extra sepcial, this is my first LO and ive not decided yet wot to do, bf sounds so time consuming etc and uv all been super dedicated

congrats ladies xx

 

[Mervs Mum]

awwww ladies when i read ur stories i think u all deserve sommat extra sepcial, this is my first LO and ive not decided yet wot to do, bf sounds so time consuming etc and uv all been super dedicated

congrats ladies xx

It is time consuming to start with but that's how life is with babies!! And it's fantastic once you get going! I went out this afternoon on the spur of the moment and I literally grabbed a nappy and some wipes, stuck them in my handbag and we were off out! It's not ALL hard work!!

 

[sam#3]

I think my midwife and my husband were what got me through it.

Everytime i was in tears and close to giving up i would ring my midwife and she would remind me how determined i was and she would talk me calm again.

My husband took over looking after my older two while i was anchored to the sofa for the first couple of months, he bought me drinks and snacks galore and did everything for the other 2 so that i could just nurse,nurse,nurse.

Im so thankful to both of them and so proud that im at nearly 5 months and i dont even feel close to stopping

 

[mommyof3co]

For me it was being determined, I was so set on not giving any formula. Casen made it to 7mo with no formula then he weaned at 11mo. I was so determined with Hayden that he would never have a drop of it...and he never did He never had a single bottle of anything, we never used one even for water. And we made it to our goal of 18mo

My boppy pillow was also a huge help in the beginning

Mark, my DH, he was always there for anything, and so supportive. Everytime I sat down to nurse he would refill my water glass

 

[Pyrrhic]

Commitment & Determination

BFing support groups.

The ladies on here. Especially MervsMum and Toria.

I think you have to be very determined to succeed if you start having problems. They say the first week is the hardest, but for me it was the first 8 weeks. Now it feels so simple, even though we are having a few issues recently with me losing my milk. It is just so worth it. If I had known how good it is now back when I swapped to formula when she was a newborn, then I would have just kept going.

 

[ryder]

I wasnt successfull...

But the things that would have helped would have been better help at home, my OH was only given 3 days off which were used for his Grandmas funeral who died 3 days before Jasmine was born, and 2 days with us.

I think that knowing how hard it was and failing has maybe made me more prepared for next time? My oh will also qualify for paternal leave too.

Sometimes I think it may have been really nice to just be able to hang out on the couch while my OH looked after cooking and stuff!

 

[Holldoll]

Having a VERY supportive husband.
I loved having a chance to sit down and spend the time with the baby. I didn't have a c-section, but I had planned a natural birth but ended up having a VERY scary birth (I still don't think I'm completely "over" it). BF was my way of wanting to bond with Bella. Without BF I think I would have had a much harder time bonding with her.

10 months later and I'm still bf. It's SO much easier. I still love snuggling with her while she nurses and we both fall asleep and nap. I LOVE those cuddles!

 

[Whisper]

I knew it was going to be tough as almost everyone around me kept on reminding me and telling me i wasn't likely to get past a couple of weeks (as they didn't), well i hate hate hate being told what to do and what i will or won't do and that just made me more determined to prove them wrong!

Because my birth went so wrong i wanted to do something natural and for me that was to b/f, i think it helped me bond with Amelia although it still did take a few weeks.

The support from girls on here was fantastic!

ooh and finally research! I did tons of research and read other people's experiences so i knew just what to expect (although you never really can 100%), i was told by my parents etc that she needed water and i should supplement with formula etc, well i'm glad i never listened!

 

[Jemima]

Preparation: I went to three sessions of breastfeeding classes when I was pregnant, which gave me a good knowledge base to refer to.

Staying in hopsital a bit longer after delivery: This allowed me to learn from the midwives and lactation consultants expertise. Just being able to push a button and get someone to help me with my baby's latch or her positioning was invaluable.

Having my mum on the end of the phone: She breastfed all of us but she lives abroad so I was constantly on the phone or webcam to her asking her questions about feeding and getting her reassurance about various niggles I had.

My hubby's pride: He seems so proud that we have come this far, especially when no-one he knows breastfed and he wasn't breastfed. It was all so alien to him and now he revels in telling people that Poppy is breastfed and I can see that he loves it when people come round and I feed her, allowing him to tell them all about it!

My pigheadedness: I have encountered various problems with feeding (all the usual stuff, I suppose) and people have often said the ubiquitous "oh, just give her a bottle!". I have dug my heels in even further each time and it has made me more and more determined to continue.

I just love it now. I find it difficult to ever imagine stopping to be honest. It's great and I'm so glad I have stuck with it! x

 

[Sarah88]

All my friends had tried and failed at bfing, I wanted to succeed and show it is possible, even through thrush, mastitis and Savannah not latching on. Plus I knew it would get better eventually.
My mum is also a LC and everyone in my family bf so I didn't want to be the only one who didn't.
Great thread Sam!!

 

[clairebear]

for me it was the fact my mum and oh were so supportive and i had loads of support from my health visitor and midwife.

I was also very lucky and had a very contented booby boy who took to it really well!

 

[Sarah88]

I love the snuggling up too

 

[Dragonfly]

I cried my eyes out at the start it was so sore and all the midwives just said I was diong it wrong and it knocked my confidence! I knew i wasnt as I am diong nothing differeng now and it dosnt hurt anymore. I wanted to cary on and i have determination as I want my son to be as healthy as possible. No doubt is hard and I said i didnt know how long i could hold it out and it depressed me as i didnt kow how long the pain would last and the amount of feeds had me chained to the sofa. Its better now than it was anyway so I am happy to continue.

 

[Mervs Mum]

Shall we ask for a sticky for this????

 

[Serene123]

My hormones Every time I tried to stop my body ached to carry on nursing!!

I also had alot of support from my birthing partner (close friend) and my mum. Rich just wanted me to be happy tbh, I was sooo upset that I was failing. Midwives, nurses and HVs were useless. Next time I'll complain if I recieve the same rubbish level of support.

Girls on here of course!

It was really, really hard to get back to BF after the ward midwife shoved a bottle in her mouth and I was a little but assumed they knew best. I'm so glad I was determined to get it back.