What should I do now? :(

[emlubu]

Ok so me and the ex split up in April due to his adultery from then on he has been verbally abusive, has come over to my house and tryed to bang down the door with our daughter in his arms from then he was only a lot supervised which he refused and didn't see her for 2 months..... Cut a long story shorter time went by and for the last 3 months he has been having our daughter on a saturday all day. But..... Recently he has started firing threats at me again like I know where u live so watch out and I hope your cancer comes back he says all this in front of our daughter sooo my solicitor has stopped contact until a contact centre is sorted so now when that starts he has to prove he can behave but now I got an email off his mum saying:
Hi Emma
*
Due to all this nonsense that you have now started again, can I ask , When will we get to see Ellianne ?* If Damien is not having her, how does the rest of the family get to see her, all her cousins , aunts and uncles, who she plays with on a Saturday as she has always done,*we are*not prepared to wait 8 - 10 weeks,till it finally gets to court, I have asked you repeatedly if I or Granddad can pick her up, but as you are unwillling to let us know where you live, thats a problem for you to solve, as mentioned also before, you could drop her off with ME or Brian, we have asked to meet you to collect her, either way, can you sort something out as soon as poss, I think you may have changed your mobile number again, as I received NO reply to the request to get Ellie dropped off for Ellito's birthday tea, last week, and Corbin has one next weekend, and then two weeks later, it is Kerrighan and my birthday, along with Brian and my Anniversary, so as you see there are a few get togethers, we want her to attend.
*
My mobile number hasn't changed so you could give me a ring, or email me back.
*
Chris

None
Of this is my
Fault he is the one being silly grrrrrr

 

[Fraggles]

I'd send a short message back saying yo can not be held responsible for what is happening this has all occurred due to her son's behaviour so maybe she needs to take it up with him.

 

[dustbunny]

What a fucking cheek! Pardon my language! I would send a short, to the point, non baited email back simply stating that the current situation has been caused by her son. His time with his daughter was spent how it wished to be, which included him involving his mother and family. It is not your responsibility to include her within your time if you feel it is not appropriate. I find her tone quite threatening actually and rather out of place.

Big hugs sent your way

 

[babybambi2011]

i completely agree, she sounds very threatening. id simply say that its her sons behavior that has resulted in this. whats stopping her from letting him see your daughter?! you are doing the right thing by stopping contact and sorting an access centre out so he can spend time with her supervised. theres obviously a reason, so stick with it chick. dont let her upset you, it just seems she is a bit of a bully. yes it would be nice for your daughter to spend time with her other family, but at what cost?? your doing the right thing, id do exactly the same! keep ur chin up xxx

 

[Laura2919]

I wouldn't explain, if she cant see it for herself I would simply tell her to look a little closer to home.

 

[Crumbsx]

Wow, his mum is a hard faced b*tch. I'm guessing she thinks the sun shines out of his arse?

I wouldn't even reply to it. And if you receive another email asking again what's going to happen, just write a simple 'as a result of your sons behaviour, he now has to see LO in a contact center, which means his wider family will be unable to see LO until he is granted unsupervised access. Although this is unfortunate for you, it is your sons doing. If you have any problems with it, take it up with your son as his actions have caused this'.

 

[emlubu]

She is terrible always has been with ex 's and yes he is the only boy soooo the sun keeps shining there.... Well spoke to the solicitor today and he has refused contact centre soooo no contact till court it looks like? Cos he obv don't want to see her that bad then?

 

[Lemonflower]

I like what Crumbs has wrote! ^^^

 

[Crumbsx]

Yeah he'll get no contact then. And the fact he's been offered contact and refused it won't make him look good at all. Most men would fight to get contact while waiting for a court hearing.

Your right, unfortunately he probably doesn't want to see her as much as you'd expect. But it's his loss.

 

[emlubu]

Yh the fact he refused I guess is good for me when courts gets here.

 

[Crumbsx]

Yeah exactly.
Tbh the courts will probably be like huh, he wants access but when offered it he doesn't take up the offer?
That to me means one of two things: he's either controlling and wants to get at you by refusing to see LO on your terms iykwim? Or he clearly doesn't want to see LO as much as he tries to pretend.

Either way, it's not good for him. And all good for you (in court). Jut unfortunate on your LO really, but that's FOBs fault.

 

[emlubu]

Exactly and she loves her daddy. But I can be mummy n daddy for now.

He said I've only said supervised so he can't or so I make it difficult for him to see her??? Why would I if it wasnt ness assay? He is strange. Think your comment above he is doing a bit of both but we will just see what court says as all the things he has said he is denying so its his word again mine I guess.... Not sure what happens

 

[Crumbsx]

You can you'll do a brilliant job!

That's silly, your doing it to protect your LO due to his behaviour. It's like you say, his actions have led to this. It's not you being malicious or anything.

I'd presume that the court would go with you, as he's not exactly making and effort by refusing access which your willingly giving him. So although it's your word against his, his actions show alot about his character, so I'd imagine they'll be more inclined to believe you.

 

[emlubu]

I do hope so!!! I've got a few messages saved and printed off. Just wish court was here now so it can be sorted.

 

[Crumbsx]

Good luck! let us know how you get on. At least you have some printed out

 

[emlubu]

Booked a holiday today may time to Spain can't wait

 

[Crumbsx]

Ooh that's good something good to look forward too!

 

[birdie]

Keeping a diary of these events would be useful for court.

Birdie x