What would you do? Chickenpox question

[Pielette]

I am due to go to a friend's birthday party next weekend, a BBQ during the day. Her eldest child has just come down with chickenpox. The youngest hasn't had it yet and there is a chance that she may be harbouring it before we go and the spots come out after.

I had it when I was a child and that would suggest I'm immune but apparently there's no guarantee of that. I am scared of going in case I'm exposed because chickenpox in pregnancy can harm the baby, or so I hear. My boys haven't had it yet either and I really could do without them getting it at this point because I would be scared I would subsequently get it, plus we have a holiday booked for the end of July which would get cancelled if either of them get it.

The thing is, this friend is one of my closest friends and I would feel awful about not going If it was someone I'm not so close to I wouldn't go but I'm so torn about this, and apparently I can't have the vaccine during pregnancy.

Thoughts?

 

[lau86]

Will her children be there mixing with you and yours? Or will it just be you and her? If the latter, I might consider going. If everyone is mixing, I wouldn't. Hopefully your friend will understand with all the reasons you've said.

 

[Pielette]

Thanks for you reply, yes I should have said it will be all of us together. My eldest and her youngest are good friends as well so I'd imagine they'll be playing together most of the afternoon.

 

[lilmisslilly]

If it was me I wouldn't go but that is only because I have severe anxiety. However, chickenpox is going round our area at the minute and my son who is 3 has yet to catch it. I like you had it as a child but my midwife has said to me at my last appointment that if I can avoid my son catching it whilst I'm pregnant but if he does get it then I'm to contact her straight away even though I've already had it. If your worried, I'm sure your friend will understand you not going for that reason. I know you don't want to let her down but you and baby are what is important right now. If you think things will be fine then go and have fun I can only speak for myself and like I said I do have anxiety so worry a lot xx

 

[Pielette]

Thank you, that's the thing I also have anxiety and am terrified of things going wrong. My miscarriage last year has changed how I feel about things like this, but that in turn makes me wonder if I'm overreacting.

 

[Becca_89]

I am 24 weeks pregnant, and work as a reception teacher, there is currently an outbreak of chickenpox in a partner class with 10 kids off at the moment. I was worried and rang my dr, he asked if i had direct contact with these children, i said i was unsure if i had before as i didnt think of it before and he said not to worry. But he didnt settle my mind. I try to avoid any contact with the other class for my own worries.

Even if you didnt have physical contact with the child with chickenpox,im sure you children would, and i can imagine if they had it you would be very worried as youd have direct contact at all times and also ofcourse it would be hard to comfort them.

I think you friend wouldn't mind, you could even call your dr and i can imagine they would advise not to be in contact and you can share that with your friend xx

 

[StaceyM]

Can you have your titers drawn and have the results back before the party? Are you certain your doctor doesn't have this on record from your early pregnancy blood tests? It's standard to test for immunity for a bunch of transmittable diseases early in pregnancy (in Canada anyway). Maybe your doctor has your results on file and you can just call and check? If you can't get the information, then I wouldn't go. It's just one party. Make it up to them at a later date.

 

[crownest]

I wouldn't risk it I'd skip the party I'm sure your friend would understand as she is a mom too.

 

[Pielette]

Thanks ladies. I don't think they routinely check for immunity to chickenpox over here but I can always ring the doctor and ask. I don't think there would be enough time to have my bloods drawn and get the results back but again worth a check.

Becca there seems to be a lot of it around at the moment, my friend was saying it's everywhere in Bedfordshire. If it's in London too I can't see Essex escaping a big outbreak. It's unnerving.

Think I will make my apologies and not go. I'd just be terrified. And I also don't want to miss out on our holiday if my boys come down with it.

 

[klsltsp]

I wouldn't risk it. I don't have the antibodies and I have had the vaccine and the booster. My son was exposed during my last pregnancy and I was told if he got spots I had 72 hrs to get to the hospital for a special injection. My doc said the risk of baby being impacted if i got the chicken pox was low but the impacts were really severe.

There is a woman on here right now who thought she was immune.. wasn't and now her baby may have cerebral palsy and they are saying it's from her having chickenpox when she was pregnant.

If your friend is really that good of a friend she will understand.

Here in Canada it is not routinely checked and it takes 2 weeks to get the blood work result... they can rush it.. it is worth asking how quickly they can get the results.

Good luck.

Kim

 

[Pielette]

Well now I've just had a phone call from her saying that the youngest has just come out in chickenpox with 6 days to go before the party. Would she be contagious or not? I'm confused because different sites say different things. My friend has told me she will tell me if all the spots have crusted over but what if she missed one?

My husband just doesn't want to go full stop because he thinks it's just too stressful.

 

[WW1]

At least you now know for sure! I think it's 5-6 days for the scabs to completely form so as long as your friend checks carefully I'd imagine it'll be fine.
Here is the NHS info on the subject
https://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Chickenpox/Pages/Introduction.aspx

 

[StaceyM]

You are contagious before you even see spots - that is when most people catch it. That's the problem with transmittable infections. Any kid could be infected at the party and you wouldn't even know. The incubation period for chicken pox is 1-2 weeks I believe, and people are contagious a couple of days before the rash shows, although it could be sooner. Do call your doctor. It takes 5 minutes to ask. If you are immune it is a moot point. I know someone else said it isn't routinely checked, but I was checked as part of my routine early pregnancy tests. You are in Europe though, and I'm in Canada. It's probably different everywhere, or maybe it depends how thorough your doctor was (since the other poster from Ontario wasn't checked). For me it's a good thing he did check because, even though I had the shot 6 years ago, it apparently didn't take, and I am not immune to chicken pox. My doctor told me that it probably wouldn't be an issue for the baby after 20 weeks if I caught it, but that the mother can become extremely sick. Here kids are regularly immunized now (not so when I was a kid), so I'm pretty safe, but it sounds like you have a lot of it where you live. Like I said, it's just a party (shrugs).

 

[Pielette]

Thank you Stacey I will ask my doctor tomorrow. Fortunately there won't be any other kids there so no risk of catching it from a child other than the two girls. I think regardless I may have to say no because I also have the concern of my boys catching it before we go on holiday.

It's just tricky because she rang me all delighted that the second one now has it so 'should be fine' for Saturday, in her words.

 

[StaceyM]

Uggh. That is tricky. Well, hopefully she understands. You could say that your doctor recommended that you don't go? A small white lie? I mean if you ask him, he probably will recommend that you stay away, so not really a lie??

 

[Pielette]

That's definitely true! Ugh it's a nightmare.