When will you stop bf? What makes your decision?

[bananaz]

My original goal was 6 months but now that she's actually here and we're past the horrible first few weeks I'm thinking at least a year. My primary motivators are also health and money, but I've actually started to enjoy nursing too (though I'm scared for her to start teething! )

 

[Millnsy]

I fed my eldest until 15 months. B she had been sttn reliably since 10 months so hadn't been night feeding at all. I had also gone back to work at 10 months so she was only feeding morning night and weekends an way. To those who are worried about supply when you go back to work, this was never an issue for me and I never pumped at work either. She had started to refuse the night time feed by the time we stopped so almost self weaned but I got pregnant so decided to stop to have a break. I think I only actually had to say no once and then she stopped asking.

 

[mommyof3co]

My goal is 2yrs but want to let him self wean. So as long as we make it to 2yrs I'll be happy After that whenever he is ready

 

[Tacey]

What if your child wanted to nurse until school age? Would you let them? Seems a lot of people would do it as long as the child wanted to. I just couldn't do that. Nothing against anyone who does but the TIme magazine cover really made me realize I wouldn't be comfy with that. I don't even know if I'll be comfy at a year.

I'm not exactly letting Alice self wean, as I'm encouraging it. I almost never offer, frequently delay and sometimes refuse! She's still nursing about 6 times a day, and asks at least twice that! I don't enjoy it as much as I did, but it means a lot to her. If she's still needing it when she's school age, then of course I'll carry on. It's been invaluable through the difficult toddler years, and has kept us close.

I applaud the lady on the Time cover for standing up (literally!) for longer term nursing, but I think it was unfortunate they posed her in such an unnatural and provocative way. That's certainly not the experience I have of breastfeeding an older child. Our nursing sessions consist of cuddling up for a couple of minutes, looking in each others eyes and reconnecting. It just feels right.

 

[Kirei]

I agree with Tacey, if my LO still needs the comfort then I will carry on as long as she needs it too. I think it's great what you're doing with Alice, and she's such a cutie, I love her picture in your avatar!
My MIL told me my BIL was still nursing very often at 4.5 and she had to start refusing and felt really sad about it but it was so hard because he was going to school, so I don't know how I'd be able to deal with that if she's still nursing by then, I think I'd try to keep it up night and morning if she needed it still at school age, but I won't force her to carry on (don't think you can force them anyway), if she self weans at 2 years, she self weans at 2 years, if she's 5, she's 5. I want it to be on her terms.
I too applaud the lady on the Time cover, she sounds like a really caring, lovely mama, and unfortunately the picture she used wasn't even one she was posing for. Apparently she did a lot of natural poses and this was just them messing around between takes that they used. See this interview here, it's very interesting xxx https://kellymom.com/blog-post/time-apmoms-interview/

 

[Casey3]

Like most mamas my goal is at least 2 years and ultimately I'd like him to self wean. I don't know what my future holds with work etc so we'll have to play it by ear.. He's such a boob addict though I could easily see him BFing past a year for sure.

I'm in Ontario, I've never seen anyone breasfeeding a toddler in public (infants yes), I'd imagine someone would probably accuse me of molesting him or something.
Even in our baby groups the moms all find a secluded place where no one is watching with their infants.

Wow, I don't know where in Ontario you are but I literally whip 'em out whenever LO is hungry or wants a snack (no cover) and have never gotten weird looks. I've only been brave enough to go to one mom group and most moms there are attachment parents so they all BF through the meetings and one will even feed her 4 year old if something has bothered him and he needs comfort... Its awesome to see and I really hope to be feeding at 2+ years

 

[KerryGold]

I would like us stopped by Christmas, when Leila will be 18 months. We will TTC next year and I don't want to do both. I also want to wean her before she really can "ask" for it. At the moment she sometimes has a morning feed and always a bedtime one but is starting to fall asleep by herself after that feed now.

So I'm working on very gently now and will see what happens. I don't really have a schedule in mind and have used the benefits when she's been ill recently.

My.original goal was 9 months when I went back to work. I fed her at lunchtime til she was about 12 months and we've been on morning and night since then.

She is tall like her Daddy (almost 98th centile) and I'm a titch but no-one really sees us feeding now and it's none of their business! I just don't get the arbitrary stopping at their 1st (or even 2nd) birthday! I want it to be a gradual and natural process for us both.

And finally, I felt like I was being knifed in the gut if I thought about stopping until a couple of months ago so I know the time is right for us is approaching. Now I just feel a little sad.

I have always fed wherever and whenever and found BFing to be eminently less faff than FF friends who had to worry about making formula, carrying bottles, warming bottles, running out of milk and not being able to do something unplanned.

xXx

 

[canadabear]

we are fast approaching the 1 year mark.. , and I can't see us stopping anytime soon. Sometimes I find it a chore, but would feel that way about FF too I am sure. There have been some weeks of no night feeds, but now we are back to once or twice a night. It is just when he needs it.
I am nervous about going to Canada for the winter, but will just continue doing what is best for us.
I don't really have a stop date as such.. hoping for him to just self wean. Will be working this winter, so might be just down to mornings, evenings and nights. He is a BIG boy both in height and weight.. off the charts for age. Never had any supply issues or worries.
But i haven't had my period and am starting to feel more run down than usual. I think i need to start supplementing my diet and eating more greens as I know BF takes what it needs from my body.
I asked OH if he had an age in mind.. he just said 14 might be a bit old..., he just sees it as natural and not an issue at all.

 

[TheNewMrs]

I would 100% let trinity nurse at school age if she wanted to. Why the heck not? I've seen 7year olds still drinking from bottles for comfort! Especially at bedtime. If she was still nursing at that age I assume it would be only once maybe twice a
Day. I wouldn't do it in public coz people are obv strange about it.

Damn you western sexualised culture.....

 

[staralfur]

Question for those of you who have nursed past a year...

How did your OH feel about it? Mine is not so thrilled! I had originally said I wanted to stop at 6 months and he agreed that was appropriate. Then I changed my mind, and wanted to make it a year, and was like "Yeah that sounds good", but thinks it's 'weird' past that.

Now I'm just of the mindset that we'll do it until she wants to stop, so who knows when that will be...I'm just worried my OH will be uncomfortable with it. Don't get me wrong, I'd still continue, but it'd be nice if we were both on the same page...

I wonder if he'll do the same as last time and just agree that longer would be okay when we get closer to that time? I hope so!

Anyway, did any of you have to kind of defend your decision to your OH to nurse past a year or were they on board from the beginning?

 

[elohcin]

Question for those of you who have nursed past a year...

How did your OH feel about it? Mine is not so thrilled! I had originally said I wanted to stop at 6 months and he agreed that was appropriate. Then I changed my mind, and wanted to make it a year, and was like "Yeah that sounds good", but thinks it's 'weird' past that.

Now I'm just of the mindset that we'll do it until she wants to stop, so who knows when that will be...I'm just worried my OH will be uncomfortable with it. Don't get me wrong, I'd still continue, but it'd be nice if we were both on the same page...

I wonder if he'll do the same as last time and just agree that longer would be okay when we get closer to that time? I hope so!

Anyway, did any of you have to kind of defend your decision to your OH to nurse past a year or were they on board from the beginning?

I would just let him watch how it is all such a natural progression. You have quite a while until you even reach 1 year, so he'll have plenty of time to come around. He may be weirded out by it now, but in 7 more months he may see that it's still VERY natural. Of course, society will always be working against you, but hopefully he'll only be able to see HIS baby and her needs rather than what random dumb people want him to think.

Thankfully my hubby came from an "extended" (not a fan of that term) nursing family so he was all for it. Expected it, actually.

 

[KerryGold]

I think my hubby thought it was probably time to stop by 1st birthday before she was born.

I told him ages ago I didn't know when we would stop but that WHO recommends 2 years.

Now I would say I think about it more than him and it's him that will encourage feeding during the day now when I don't.

As the others have said, her birthday came and went and he saw she still needs/wants it and he never says anything about us stopping now!

We've always done everything very gently and I guess we believe weaning should follow the same approach.

xXx

 

[Dk1234]

I wouldn't give a 7 year old a bottle. I guess maybe that plays a part in why I wouldn't consider extended nursing. I wouldn't give a bottle past a year. And when I say I'll quit and I wouldn't give a bottle past a year, I don't mean I'll stop the second he is one. I'll gradually wean him from feeds probably starting at 9 months or so but I'll probably store up expressed milk and give it in a cup past a year.

 

[lau86]

I stopped at ten months. I had a horrendous start and was in pain pretty much every feed for the first 3 months. I knew i wanted to get to the weaning stage. In all honesty I would've switched to formula about 7 months but my LO didn't want a bottle. At ten months he was constantly messing about on the breast and was not interested in lying still to feed. I was going back to work and knew I wouldn't always be there for morning and evening feeds so I took the opportunity and stopped. I wasn't keen on extended feeding, I (you may say selfishly) wanted my boobs and my body back, but if my LO had been super keen I would've carried on. He stopped feeding and was never upset about it. We did very well given what we dealt with (tongue tie, 2 times mastitis, thrush) so I'm proud

 

[snowfia]

My OH thinks it's weird past 1 too.
It tbh, on their first birthday what's going to change from the day before? Nothing major. Its not like they suddenly become all different on their first birthday.

I just don't talk about it with OH now and I'm just going to continue until LO is ready to stop. I'm sure OH won't want me to stop if I explain to him that he'll have to help put her to bed if I'm not feeding her to sleep haha.

 

[gardenofedens]

Question for those of you who have nursed past a year...

How did your OH feel about it? Mine is not so thrilled! I had originally said I wanted to stop at 6 months and he agreed that was appropriate. Then I changed my mind, and wanted to make it a year, and was like "Yeah that sounds good", but thinks it's 'weird' past that.

Now I'm just of the mindset that we'll do it until she wants to stop, so who knows when that will be...I'm just worried my OH will be uncomfortable with it. Don't get me wrong, I'd still continue, but it'd be nice if we were both on the same page...

I wonder if he'll do the same as last time and just agree that longer would be okay when we get closer to that time? I hope so!

Anyway, did any of you have to kind of defend your decision to your OH to nurse past a year or were they on board from the beginning?

Initially I thought I'd only make it to a year but now I'm kinda thinking I'd like to go longer. For now, I'm aiming for a year, but hopefully I can BF longer than that until she's ready to wean. DH and I spoke about it yesterday and he's on board with it, surprisingly! My parents will be a completely different matter for sure though...

 

[summer rain]

My OH thinks it's weird past 1 too.
It tbh, on their first birthday what's going to change from the day before? Nothing major. Its not like they suddenly become all different on their first birthday.

I just don't talk about it with OH now and I'm just going to continue until LO is ready to stop. I'm sure OH won't want me to stop if I explain to him that he'll have to help put her to bed if I'm not feeding her to sleep haha.

^this. I remember when my youngest turned one. My 6-year-old seemed to be studying him intently and exclaimed 'but he can't be one now as he still looks zero!' xx

 

[monkers1984]

Sorry to answer the previous Question on a previous page for me .. I really started to enjoy breastfeeding after the initially 6 weeks -- the first six weeks were hard and took a lot of determination -- every feed was painful and having bottle fed my first I was constantly worrying about whether he was having enough as I couldn't measure I was starting to drive myself insane lol but after 6 weeks it just became so easy and felt so natural. I love the closeness that breastfeeding brings.
I feel so proud that at 17 weeks old my little man weighs in at 17lbs 13oz -- he's nearly doubled his birth weight (he was 9lb 2oz born) and knowing that's it's all from me!!

To answer the following question about how hubby feels -- he is very pro breastfeeding and wants me to feed until at least 2 and beyond! I'm lucky he is so supportive x x

 

[Lauki]

I'm planning to stop when she's ready, or when I don't feel comfortable feeding anymore.

I've started to enjoy feeding as opposed to doing it to feed her when she was about 6 months. Before that I didn't dislike it, I just wasn't super excited about it. She started feeding a bit less and I could enjoy playing with her more. Now I think BF is the most awesome thing ever. She feeds about 2-3 times a day and it's great! Sometimes like during these really hot/muggy days she'll come up to me and 'asks' for a feed. She will have been grumpy for ages, but after she nurses for a couple of minutes she's happy to go off and play again! It's a life saver.

My hubby wasn't too excited about feeding past one. But when she turned one, nothing really changed. She didn't all of the sudden change into a different (big) child. She's still the same girlie, still completely 100% dependent on us. I told him, if he wants me to stop feeding he just has to do 2 things. He will have to show me research that feeding past 1 does not have any benefits and he will have to put her to bed every night without me relaxing her by nursing her before bed . He soon agreed for me to continue!

 

[Aurora_xox]

Like with most other people, I'm going to leave the decision up to her. I love nursing her, think I'll be quite sad when she decides she doesn't need it anymore.