Where will baby sleep?

[redlemonade]

I was initially set on the NCT bednest until I saw one in real life - it just seemed so flimsy!

I'm wondering if it is worth having a moses basket for day time naps downstairs?

I think it might be worth it. We got one as a present and it's just beautiful!

 

[sarah34]

I can see why people co sleep and everyone is entitled to their opinion but I point blankly refuse to have my baby in our bed other than when he is older and he comes in in the morning or something. In my opinion there is no need for him to be in bed with us, he will be in a crib at the end of the bed for the first 5/6ish months and then into the cot. I do have a Moses for downstairs in the first few months and when he grows out of that he will go upstairs in the crib for naps. (By crib I mean bigger than Moses but smaller than cot)
Our bed will remain for us to sleep and everything else that is done is bed! Lol

 

[Rosie06]

We will more than likey do the same as we did with DD, first 2 weeks we had the moses basket down stairs for naps through the day but took it into our room on a night after 2 weeks i used to put her in her cotbed which was in her room for naps with monitor on that way she was used to been in there, then by 8 weeks (which was sooner than we were expecting) she went into her own room in the cotbed as she had outgrown the basket and was sleeping through consistently from 6 weeks, we had no issues whatsoever with the change over and shes always been a fantastic sleeper, im hoping DS will be the same when he arrives x

 

[Celesse]

Also to the PP who said co-sleeping makes babies too attached. I don't understand how it is even possible for an infant to be "too attached". For us co-sleeping has been amazing and especially in the early days is the only reason we get any sleep!

This is just my opinion, just by what i have seen and been told, like i say, a friend of mine has her baby sleep in her bed with her, she says she regrets this as now her 1 YO baby wont sleep anywhere else but in her bed or next to her, she cant have anyone else look after her LO over night, she recently had a party to go to she couldn't drink all night and had to disturb her baby sitter to pick LO up late at night so she could take her home to bed as she wouldn't settle sleeping else where.
I know your baby is far more important than a party and im not saying i dont want to co-sleep just so i can go partying, that's the last thing ill be doing, but for any reason when a overnight baby sitter is needed its not fair on both baby and baby sitter!
i also see the dangers in co-sleeping, and by co-sleeping i mean sharing a bed with you, not the cribs that attatch to the bed. ive heard many stories where parents have laid on their baby, my OH's gran knows someone who put baby in bed with her, she is a light sleeper and usually wakes to anything, on this particular night she woke with the baby laid at the bottom of the bed and the baby had suffocated through the night. id be far too terrified this would happen so personally wouldn't take the risk.
Im not judging any parent that bed shares, its entirely up to the individual, i think its great many people manage it and have the best of luck with it, i just personally would rather have my own space and give baby his own space too.

Tragic.... but I can almost guarantee that baby didn't start the night in bed with them and they were not practicing safe co-sleeping. "Co-sleeping causes SIDS" data tends to include figures from babies who ended up in bed in the middle of the night as an unplanned event when mum was tired, and obese parents, and smokers and drug & alcohol users. And third hand stories also tend to include these non safe co-sleepers as well.

There is a massive difference between planned safe bed sharing and unplanned unsafe bed sharing.

I have safely co-slept with both my children. You sleep differently when you co-sleep. I would wake before baby wakes, before baby stirs. Every movement I'd be aware of. We don't drink, or smoke, or are obese. Baby is away from duvet and pillows and away from Daddy.

And too attached..... no chance!! I have some very happy independent and secure little children. They both know that they have the security of mummy's bed there if they need it and both now love there own beds. I think a 1 year old still wanting to be in mummy and daddy's bed is perfectly normal and age appropriate. Give that baby a few months and s/he will be fine in their own bed.

 

[Celesse]

To add.... if anyone had asked me in my first pregnancy where baby would sleep I would have said in a moses basket in my room and then in a cot in her own room from around 6 months.

...reality, co-slept until about 11 months.

 

[sun]

Also to the PP who said co-sleeping makes babies too attached. I don't understand how it is even possible for an infant to be "too attached". For us co-sleeping has been amazing and especially in the early days is the only reason we get any sleep!

This is just my opinion, just by what i have seen and been told, like i say, a friend of mine has her baby sleep in her bed with her, she says she regrets this as now her 1 YO baby wont sleep anywhere else but in her bed or next to her, she cant have anyone else look after her LO over night, she recently had a party to go to she couldn't drink all night and had to disturb her baby sitter to pick LO up late at night so she could take her home to bed as she wouldn't settle sleeping else where.
I know your baby is far more important than a party and im not saying i dont want to co-sleep just so i can go partying, that's the last thing ill be doing, but for any reason when a overnight baby sitter is needed its not fair on both baby and baby sitter!
i also see the dangers in co-sleeping, and by co-sleeping i mean sharing a bed with you, not the cribs that attatch to the bed. ive heard many stories where parents have laid on their baby, my OH's gran knows someone who put baby in bed with her, she is a light sleeper and usually wakes to anything, on this particular night she woke with the baby laid at the bottom of the bed and the baby had suffocated through the night. id be far too terrified this would happen so personally wouldn't take the risk.
Im not judging any parent that bed shares, its entirely up to the individual, i think its great many people manage it and have the best of luck with it, i just personally would rather have my own space and give baby his own space too.

Tragic.... but I can almost guarantee that baby didn't start the night in bed with them and they were not practicing safe co-sleeping. "Co-sleeping causes SIDS" data tends to include figures from babies who ended up in bed in the middle of the night as an unplanned event when mum was tired, and obese parents, and smokers and drug & alcohol users. And third hand stories also tend to include these non safe co-sleepers as well.

There is a massive difference between planned safe bed sharing and unplanned unsafe bed sharing.

I have safely co-slept with both my children. You sleep differently when you co-sleep. I would wake before baby wakes, before baby stirs. Every movement I'd be aware of. We don't drink, or smoke, or are obese. Baby is away from duvet and pillows and away from Daddy.

And too attached..... no chance!! I have some very happy independent and secure little children. They both know that they have the security of mummy's bed there if they need it and both now love there own beds. I think a 1 year old still wanting to be in mummy and daddy's bed is perfectly normal and age appropriate. Give that baby a few months and s/he will be fine in their own bed.

Totally Agree!

And same with every co-sleeping family I know. Dead-set against it before having their first - I actually was given loads of grief from a friend for co-sleeping with my son (putting his life at risk, irresponsible mum, etc). Two years later she started co-cleeping with her 7week old lol.

If you follow your instincts (whether co-sleeping or not) and do what is right for your family, then you can't really go wrong. And co-sleeping is very safe if done right (like everything else). But imagining what will work for you before baby comes can be tricky. My parenting has taken several overhauls as we've encountered new challenges over the years!

 

[lisa1980]

I was adamant LO would sleep in a crib in our room then in a cot in own room from 6 months. I definitely did not want to co-sleep.

Then he was born and he was an awful sleeper....honestly woke 1-2 hourly for months and really didn't improve until 18month+ despite trying many many 'sleep training' methods.

In the end the only way any of us got any sleep was by co-sleeping. He would stir in the night, reach out a hand and touch my arm or whatever and then go back to sleep, meaning I wouldn't have to get out of bed. It was also a godsend for BF.

This time I'm embracing the co-sleeping, safely, from the begininning if needed as, if I'm honest, I loved every minute of it once I stopped fighting it. There's nothing more peaceful than snuggling a sleeping baby and for the vast majority of their lives they won't be sleeping with us so I will cherish this brief period.

I think the truth is that every baby and parent is different so you just have to go with what feels right for you

 

[Coco Tutu]

Our little one will sleep on a baby mattress right next to our bed. So it will be wall, baby mattress, our mattress. Montessori style . This means that once our little one is older, she will be able to crawl/walk on/off her bed on her own. I think this promotes independence, but we shall see.

Here in the Netherlands the first week after birth new moms are offered kraamzorg. This is basically a nurse who visits you a minimum of 3 hours per day (and max 8 hours per day). So I had an intake meeting with the kraamzorg lady this week and I was afraid she would say our setup is un-hygenic or dangerous. This was not the case at all though! She found it perfectly fine and safe

 

[Pearls18]

Our little one will sleep on a baby mattress right next to our bed. So it will be wall, baby mattress, our mattress. Montessori style . This means that once our little one is older, she will be able to crawl/walk on/off her bed on her own. I think this promotes independence, but we shall see.

Here in the Netherlands the first week after birth new moms are offered kraamzorg. This is basically a nurse who visits you a minimum of 3 hours per day (and max 8 hours per day). So I had an intake meeting with the kraamzorg lady this week and I was afraid she would say our setup is un-hygenic or dangerous. This was not the case at all though! She found it perfectly fine and safe

I've recently come back from visiting my mum's for 2 weeks she has a cot bed but it is on the lowest setting for my son and not next to the guest bed, I wasn't sure what to do because my husband who is working away could come stay some nights but there was nowhere else in the house to sleep and the bed was only a double unlike the king we have at home or I would have bed shared with DS2, so instead I put the mattress on the floor next to the bed because I thought that would be more familiar to him as we use a cot with no rail next to our bed usually, and it was fab, he felt close, he was safe, and I could easily pop my arm down to reassure him and lift him up easily to feed, seems strange to have baby sleeping on almost the floor but worked quite well!

 

[Coco Tutu]

Our little one will sleep on a baby mattress right next to our bed. So it will be wall, baby mattress, our mattress. Montessori style . This means that once our little one is older, she will be able to crawl/walk on/off her bed on her own. I think this promotes independence, but we shall see.

Here in the Netherlands the first week after birth new moms are offered kraamzorg. This is basically a nurse who visits you a minimum of 3 hours per day (and max 8 hours per day). So I had an intake meeting with the kraamzorg lady this week and I was afraid she would say our setup is un-hygenic or dangerous. This was not the case at all though! She found it perfectly fine and safe

I've recently come back from visiting my mum's for 2 weeks she has a cot bed but it is on the lowest setting for my son and not next to the guest bed, I wasn't sure what to do because my husband who is working away could come stay some nights but there was nowhere else in the house to sleep and the bed was only a double unlike the king we have at home or I would have bed shared with DS2, so instead I put the mattress on the floor next to the bed because I thought that would be more familiar to him as we use a cot with no rail next to our bed usually, and it was fab, he felt close, he was safe, and I could easily pop my arm down to reassure him and lift him up easily to feed, seems strange to have baby sleeping on almost the floor but worked quite well!

I am glad to hear that! I started to sleep on floor level since I was 18 and left home to study in another city. My parents found it odd, but finally accepted it and even put a mattress on the floor for me back home. 10 years later, I still enjoy having so much free space above my head when I sleep

When it comes to safety and hygiene, I think that as long as there is a thick rug under the mattresses (especially for colder climates) and vacuuming happens frequently, there is nothing to worry about.

 

[Rachie004]

It's great to have so many positive co sleeping stories

This has really reinforced my plans, thank you so much

xx

 

[Coco Tutu]

It's great to have so many positive co sleeping stories

This has really reinforced my plans, thank you so much

xx

Great thread Rachie! I think it helped many first time moms, like myself, feel more confident about our co-sleeping (or close-sleeping) plans.

 

[Buttercup84]

We have a little swinging crib for our bedroom, DD slept in that until about 3.5 months when she moved into the cotbed in her room. She was getting too big for it by that point and was mostly sleeping through anyway. We'll play it by ear as to when we move this baby. For daytime naps he/she will sleep in the pram downstairs at first, then go into the cotbed upstairs like DD did. Again, will play it by ear as to when we make the transition from one to the other

 

[Jencocoa]

Bassinet next to my bed, probably or 6 mo ths or so. Then crib and rooming with big bro hopefully!

 

[Button#]

Absolute minimum of six months in our room in either a Moses basket, cot or safe co-sleeping, whichever baby wants at the time. We'll move number 2 into number 1's room whenever we feel everyone is ready.

I was also adamant that I would never co-sleep an it was dangerous but I researched how to do it safely just incase and I'm glad I did because we have needed to at various points (around his first birthday was when we actually co slept the most).

I would urge everyone to research how to co sleep safely even if you never need to as you won't want to be doing research at 3am when you have a screaming baby who won't sleep anywhere but tucked up next to you. Also if you plan to BF it really can be a sanity saver.

 

[minties]

I was another who wasn't going to co-sleep. I was 100% sure. I also wasn't going to ever use a swaddle, or a dummy, or white noise, or 'let the baby dictate my life'.

Guess who did all of the above?

Having a screaming, tiny, red faced newborn keep you awake all night for days on end is soul destroying. You'll be surprised at how utterly depressing it is. I would much, MUCH rather co-sleep in the safety of my bed, than find myself having a breakdown at 3am and wanting to run screaming from my house, or worse, drifting off to sleep on the couch with the baby and smothering or dropping it.

Co-sleeping with Sophie, I got 8-7am with 4 feeds during the night, lasting 10 minutes each. Not co-sleeping, she would wake 8 or so times, wouldn't settle, would wake as soon as I tried to move her, would sleep for 2 minutes then start wimpering, and then I'd have a miserable baby awake for more than an hour.

It is the nature of lactating mammals to sleep with their young.nhow many cats do you know who stick their kittens in a separate bed?

 

[pooch]

I had a playpen with a little newborn sleeper attachment thing that I put my DD in next to my bed when she was first born, then when she got a little bigger I went out and bought a bassinet. She would sleep in this for nap and at night. When she was old enough I brought her into bed with us and that's where she still sleeps at night, taking naps in her crib and now in her toddler bed.