Why does everyone hate their dr and hv?

[whoops]

My HV is fantastic - she called out so many times near the start to help me try and breastfeed, got me loads of information and referred me on to a support group.

When I had a tough time coping last month, she got me details of a counselling service and wrote a referral letter to them so I wouldn't have to wait too long to see someone. She also calls out every week to chat to me and is pretty much the only person to reassure me that I'm doing a good job with my LO.

My GP is fine, but a bit out of touch with babies - I wouldn't ask him for advice on weaning etc, only on health issues. But he's been my family doctor since I was a baby and knows me well and is very supportive.

 

[hinkybinky]

I have an issue with my Dr because I've been in there with CMO advice printed off about not giving soya milk to CMP allergic babies and they refused to give me anything but. I suspect it's for budgetary reasons so they are not really wanting the best for my son. That I have an issue with. That and the fact I've seen various HVs, GPs, nursery nurses over last 6 months and none of them recognised he had an allergy. I'm a FTM but they must've seen the symptoms dozens of times so it does make me a bit cross that they didn't pick it up seeing as he had all the classic symptoms. Why should we have to research the latest advice ourselves when they are meant to be professionals?

 

[Gemie]

Love my doctor but hate my hv b/c the first time she came round I was in the middle of a huge panic attack at my worst with my pnd... I desperately asked her what I coukld do to help mke switch off to sleep and she asked me if I drank and told me to have a drink! when I told her I was t total she said 'oh best not have a drink anyway my parents were alcoholics'
I've later found out one of the worst things you can do is drink with depression.

The second time she came she asked me if I'd put on weight while pregnant I said no I lost 2 stone and she said oh good, just another 2 to loose now'! she's a silly old bitch and everytime I've asked not have her again she's still always the one to phone or call round.

 

[bigbetty]

I feel really lucky that my hv is very supportive and helpful. In the office there is her, another hv and a nurse and I wouldn't hesitate to speak to any of them. I go to the first time mums group that is run by them and I sometimes pop to the clinic too. If I need a private conversation all I have to do is call and Mary will come out to see me.

Wow your HV's sound amazing!

Yeah she really is. She is very intuitive and knows if something isn't quite right and is a mine of information on PND.

When I first saw her she asked how I was feeding Fran so I told her formula. She asked me which one and when I said sma her reply was "Oh good, that's what I used with my daughter". I didn't expect that in a million years lol.

 

[MrsVenn]

^^ sounds like my lot too

 

[teal]

I think my GP is fab she was very supportive of my breastfeeding when my hv kept pushing formula because my son was a slow weight gainer - he was perfectly healthy!

 

[sapphire1]

I'm in the minority I think. Holly had silent reflux and a cows milk protein intolerance, so we had lots of problems with her from newborn. The HV team at my surgery are fantastic, I was ringing them constantly in the early days and they bent over backwards to help. The GP that sees all the babies at the surgery used to be a paediatrician, so he really knows his stuff. There are a few appointments with him every week after baby clinic, if you need to see him you just ring the hv and they'll book you in. He diagnosed Holly immediately, gave meds and expensive prescription formula with no hesitation or need to get a paed referral. I get repeat prescriptions for her milk (8 tins - about 200 quids worth), whenever I need them. The surgery also ran a free 5 week baby massage course, a weaning class and 2 first aid courses. I feel really fortunate, as I know plenty of people whose LOs have reflux/milk intolerance and they really struggle to get treatment and diagnosis. A big part of the problem is that GPs in particular don't really know much about babies, and are unconfident in dealing with them.

 

[summer rain]

^What Claire said. Also in the UK mostly we deal with GPs who do not have specific training on children's issues, we don't have paediatricians as in many other countries. My 4 year old still has serious food intolerances which I believe he may have grown out of if my old GP and old HV had helped us to get a referral for serious digestive problems he was having, instead of just saying it was a problem with my milk and telling me to exclusively express, my old GP told me to put him on soya formula (and my other LO with allergies as well), but I refused knowing how soya is generally not recommended, the only non prescription formula I could get at the time which he was semi-ok on was a comfort formula but after a few months on it he again started to get severely constipated yet would have the urge to pass tiny pebbles of poo every half hour to an hour, didn't gain weight well anymore, had a bloated belly etc, which HCPs told me is just normal for his age and blah de blah its only about six months back when I took the initative and cut dairy and soya out of his diet that he has got better. I'm worried he may now be more susceptible to crohns which runs in my family. This is not to mention all the other run ins with various doctors, paediatricians and HVs/vaccination nurses. xx

 

[summer rain]

BTW my current GP is lovely and helpful in most issues.

 

[Katt]

My hv is lovely, but there are some I have seen at the weighing conic who were quite rude. I think new mums are so vulnerable that it is important to get one who is helpful, non judgemental and with a good knowledge of a range of issue. Without this mums can feel let down, insecure and abandoned.

I have s very low opinion of my doctors, they are GPs ie GENERAL practitioners. NOT EXPERTS! But they seem to think they are and are unwilling to admit they don't know!

I the reason I go to my docs is I need treatment for thyrotoxicosis. However I am bf so it is complicated. The last doc I saw told me that I had no option but to give up bf, that all the evidence says babies should be off the breast by 9 months! He was talking utter rubbish. But I need my doc to refer me to an endochronlogist so I have to keel going to see them.

It is wonderful that we have an nhs and that our healthcare is free. But this comes at a price and service is very inconsistent.

 

[Katt]

Op you ask why not hqve a conversation with the doc rather than just rant.

For example, info on one of the drugs I could take says that the infants thyroid status should be monitored during treatment. I asked him how they would do this, he said 'you cant'. Full stop. No explanation. No discussion.

One of the other doctors at the same practice is well know for only saying 'what is the problem'. He listens to what you say then writes a prescription and hands it over. End of consultation.

Doctors seem to expect you to just agree with them. As soon as you question them they don't like it!

Another example, with thrush many doctors are unaware of current recommendations for treatment when breastfeeding. The breastfeeding network produced a leaflet aimed at doctors. I took one to mine to show him what I need and he tore it up in front of me and threw it in the bin. Should I have had a discussion with him? A I being irrational about this?!

Sorry, I have real issue with docs at the minute, yo have set me off on a rant!

 

[louandivy]

Its probably a bit unreasonable but I just don't fully trust Dr's opinions because of past experiences. My dad went to his GP and was told he had a slipped disc which was why he was suffering from back pain, this went on for two years with him receiving treatment for it and trying to explain to his GP that it wasn't helping until he found out that he actually had a very rare form of cancer on his spine. He died in less than a year I also have a lot of experience of consultants and doctors as I have spent a lot of time in and out of psychiatric hospitals and a lot of them like to just throw the easiest solution at you and shove you out the door. The midwives in my area are lovely but the last time I went to the dr about Ivy's constipation she literally went on google in front of me and just says 'looks like orange juice would help'

 

[purplepower]

My GP is fab and I can't complain about the treatment I have received from any of the MW or HV that I have see. Now the GP receptionists, that's another story, they are just sooooo rude.

Seriously though if I go to my GP with a specific question, he will discuss with me what the current evidence is and what the current recommendations are, he will also tell me what his opinion is on the matter. He even tried to encourage me to have a home birth (I chose to go to the birth centre though). My GP does know that I am a nurse, so I don't know whether he is like this with everyone or not.

 

[hinkybinky]

We have 6 GPs in our practice. The only GP I will go to see now with my son is the one who openly admits he knows nothing about children and babies, and therefore has to ring a paediatric doctor at the local hospital to get advice on what to prescribe and what course of action to take. Clearly this seems a bit ridiculous but at least I can trust that his information will be current and accurate. Sorry to say from experience the others just seem to give any old answer rather than admit they are not sure. Have thought about changing GP but to be honest I have not heard anyone with anything good to say about their GP in this area. When I was in London I loved all my GPs. Don't know what it is about this area, perhaps because it's a deprived area nobody wants to practise here...?

 

[AlwaysPraying]

Lots of interesting replies. Good conversation I think. I can see why lots of people would be hesitant when they have had past bad experiences.

I know here there are not enough doctors per patient. It's scary really. My friend had a mass on her belly and was told the wait would be 6 months. Even if they knew for sure it was cancer the wait would still be 6 months wait. She was encouraged to jump the boarder and get expensive but quick help in the states. A very sad state of affairs.

I think so much of what we go through is "new mom" life. I'm certain many doctors see worried moms where there is no real serious issue and then sometimes miss the ones who do have a real issue because of that. My dr is good. He's got a very natural method. Wants me to trust my instincts and understands that I worry. He won't pass me off but he does admit that babies change so quickly that we must be patient with them and use caution in diagnosing them. Sorry I'm rambling.

 

[pinklightbulb]

Mine is well meaning but very old fashioned, so I took everything she said with a pinch of salt but I don't hate her. She has good advice sometimes.

 

[Windmills]

My HV told me there was nothing wrong with Daisy when I called her, and said I was paranoid and dramatic (she's a family nurse so I'm supposed to use her as a first point of contact). 13 hours later she was fitting. 14 hours later my 10 week old was being held down for a lumbar puncture, and then getting IV antibiotics in hospital for another week.
I hate my HV because she could have cost my baby's kidney.

 

[Nic1107]

I'm very careful about which doctors I choose now. When Carmen was 32 weeks in utero, Carmen had hiccups on the u/s and they thought it may be back flow in the umbilical cord. Without even waiting to do a second scan even though I pointed out that the line only dipped when she hiccuped (I knew what her hiccups felt like, ffs!), they admitted us to the hospital and started me on steroids so they could begin the induction process the next day.

THANK GOD for my heart defect- it the was only reason I was sent (in the middle of the night) to another hospital, one of the best hospitals in the state. They did another scan there, everything was all clear and they sent us home with appointments to come back twice a week for the rest of my pregnancy, to monitor Carmen's growth. The first hospital was also planning to c-sec me because of my heart; the second hospital had no problem letting me deliver. If I'd have stayed at the first hospital, I'd almost certainly have had an unnecessary c-section and a baby that was 8 weeks premature for no reason at all.

I love Carmen's pediatrician, I've known and trusted my cardiologist all my life (literally; I first went to him at 6 weeks old and he was the one I called for advice about my heart defect during pregnancy), the perinatologist in charge of Carmen's pre-natal care and the obstetrician who delivered her were absolutely fantastic. But I will never set foot in the first hospital again, and I will interview and primary care provider I choose from here on in before ever entrusting our health care to them!

 

[Tiffa130]

It really depends on the doctor. My OB that saw me through my pregnancy was amazing but my regular doctor is pretty useless.

She Writes prescriptions (for progesterone at 6 weeks preg) & when I asked why her answer was it's sometimes prescribed for pregnant women!
Doesn't really answer why she was prescribing it to me.

However she is fine with my OH & seemed ok with my
LO (the one time she has been to see the dr) so I think she is uncomfortable with female patients.

 

[Farie]

I don't, my Dr is fine (for me and DH), for LO we see a wonderful Paed, and our m/w was AMAZING and our wellchild follow up is with our plunket nurse and shes lovely, If shes not about I see the Karatane nurse who's also brilliant.