Why make such a big deal??

[Logiebear]

Ok so I have been reading through alot of thread lately and asking myself why do we make such a big deal out of giving birth? Personally I have always been the type of person who thinks, get on with it and that's that!

I was wondering if you share opinions on why so many women spend so much time researching, reading, deliberating stressing and fussing over something which last for most women just a day and at the end of it all you get the most amazing thing ever, your baby!

I am not saying wether you should or shouldn't fuss and do all you want to but I am just wondering if anyone knows why the birth of your baby makes women spend so much time focusing on that little part of being a mum.

So are you a kind of woman who says, "I'll just get on with it" or the kind who spends weeks researching options and trying different things?

 

[tiggertea]

I have been one of the "get on with it" ladies all along - I mean bubs is in there now and has to come out! But lately (mostly coz of things I've read on here tbh) I've been completely freaking out about the whole thing.... I think it's because we have so much information readily available to us that we concentrate too much on "knowing" exactly what's gonna happen, when and how.
After a particularly panicky evening last night, I have decided that I don't wanna know anymore - baby will get here one way or another, and I personally don't think I'll be too bothered if someones wafting aromatherapy oils at me - I'd prob knock a massage therapist out if they tried to come near me and all the best intentions of putting birthing "techniques" to the test will most likely be thrown to the wind once bubs decides to make an appearance.
Hope those references don't offend anyone - that's not my intention, it's just how I think I personally will be capable of dealing with the situation!

 

[nataliecn]

Maybe people just want it to be a very peaceful experience... even though everyone knows that what you get at the end is obviously beyond amazing... but i've heard labour horror stories, and i'd rather mine not be like that..
needless to say, i don't go out researching how i want to have my labour, but i'm still only 27 weeks.. What I do know, is I want the bloody epidural, otherwise I'll be too much of a baby! In the end - I just want my baby out the way that's best for him!

 

[Pyrrhic]

....because it's one of the biggest experiences of your life so why wouldn't you want to know what goes on?

I researched into it, and I'm very glad I did! I knew what to expect, and I wanted as natural and drug-free labour as possible. Because I knew what to expect as the different stages, I was more relaxed and had a wonderful birth. I knew what my muscles were trying to do through contractions, so I remembered to relax and let them do their job. I knew what breathing techniques worked for me, I knew in advance what I wanted and what would relax me the most.

So it may only be one day, but it's a pretty important one.

 

[lesleyann]

because i hate pain and people only ever seem to want to tell you the horror stories and scare the crap out of you and i want to no whats going on with my body..

saying that i have not done loads of research but i proberly will as time goes on

 

[marley2580]

....because it's one of the biggest experiences of your life so why wouldn't you want to know what goes on?

I researched into it, and I'm very glad I did! I knew what to expect, and I wanted as natural and drug-free labour as possible. Because I knew what to expect as the different stages, I was more relaxed and had a wonderful birth. I knew what my muscles were trying to do through contractions, so I remembered to relax and let them do their job. I knew what breathing techniques worked for me, I knew in advance what I wanted and what would relax me the most.

So it may only be one day, but it's a pretty important one.

I completely agree. I know many women who have been traumatised to the point of post traumatic stress syndrome by their births going wrong. I know other women who have been healed by having a positive birth experience (usually a home birth, but not always). I did a lot of research and wrote a very detailed birth plan before I had Kaya. When it all went wrong, I knew what to expect and what I could do to keep some level of control, meaning I still had a positive experience.

 

[jackiea85]

I did a lot of reading and went to NCT classes. I think knowing what might happen did help, my labour wasn't great, I had a few problems but I think knowledge really did help me not get too upset and stressed out about it afterwards. I think research is a good idea as long as you don't get too hung up on your birth plan, nothing in my birth plan happened, though I think that's something that depends on circumstances and different hospitals xx

 

[Dizzy321]

I definatly think it helps reading things and doing research on giving birth! like rafwife said it helps understand whats happening in each stage of labour so you can work with your body. I wish i knew more about c sections when i gave birth cause this is a possibility and having a section was the last thing on my mind and I could have saved alot of stress! I will be going in with my eyes wide open this time. Surely being clued up on giving birth-the most important time of a womans life cant be a bad thing x

 

[Nutmeg]

I don't think that someone who gets on with it necessarily means someone who doesn't look into things or research things or whatever.

I'm a get on with it person. Like you say its there its got to come out no point stressing over it really but its only natural to be worried about something you may never have experienced before. Education on birth is very important. If a women knows what to expect and how her body is going to be working and what options are available to her she is more likely to have a smooth labour with less stress and less interference. I feel it would be ignorant not too look into your options and find out what going on tbh.

 

[Jkelmum]

I just got on with it birth plans ect always go out window with me anyway

 

[KatienSam]

no i want to go into labour fully aware of what is going to happen. i will try anything that could ease delivery of my baby safely and as stress free as possible, i think you need to learn about it. i would be absolutely gutted if i got to hospital and they started talking about things they were going to do/try and i didnt know!

its only 1 day of the rest of your life but its also the well being of your baby and your body, and the most important day of your life!

xxx

 

[Hevz]

I read a ridiculous amount of baby books and magazines as I wanted to fully understand what was gonna happen. Pros and cons....everything. Sometimes I think I know a bit too much and wish I didn't as I can panic unnecessarily but that's probably also coz of the two babies I lost shortly after birth, so can't help but worry about every litle thing


I still watch the pregnancy and birth programmes now....I find the whole thing amazing and very interesting. I fill up every time I see a baby born on tv or hear about one born on here, it's so overwhelming and a true miracle in my opinion

 

[dizzy duck]

Im a get on with it person but have looked in to birth, I want to know everything that is going to happen, its better to be informed than be there and them saying something and it worry you. I already know Im having a C section but still reading about it so I know what to expect and when. Hope everyone gets the birth they want. take care XX

 

[tasha41]

Well I'm not worrying too much about the actual birth, I know how it works and all that, and that's enough for me I'm having the typical birth here, the way everyone does it: having my baby at the hospital and for the most part letting the doctors/nurses guide me. I have full faith in them as I have a family full of healthcare professionals (who have been in the business 20, 30+ years & others who are still in medical school) and I am delivering in the hospital both my mother and my boyfriend's mother work in.

I'm reading up a lot more on the before and after birth parts, pregnancy & parenting. I'm far more concerned about what will/could happen to me or my child while I'm NOT surrounded by a crew of professionals who handle births as their career.

 

[ChloesMummy]

With my first i didnt research or look into it much i was young and on my own, i had no birth plan and i didnt go to anteneatal classes all i did was read a book given to me by my auntie and watched a few birth pogrammes and i was realy relaxed about going into labour and giving birth i had no fears. I was of the mind that this baby has to come out, im not going to worry about it, i was a bit naive in thinking nothing can go wrong.

This time however from the minute i got my BFP i have read, googled, watched so much that i have been constantly paranoid thinking that something was wrong or something will go wrong during the birth. Im not saying you shouldnt know what is going to happen but for me knowing too much has not been a good thing!!!!!!

 

[Soon2be3]

I personally Think alot of it has to do with the Media, When they show/tell about women giving birth, they leave out all the small and big details. Or you see those people who says they wish they knew what to expect.

Therefore we all wonder and research it. People try to prepare themselfs and although thye get freaked out they now know what to expect.

 

[lollylou1]

i was a just get on with it kind of girl of girl, but before i did just get on with it i researched everything i needed first like if i was happy with different pain relief and if i wanted baby to have vitamin k etc. once i was happy with the choices i had made i got on with it but i do think it is a big important day, you are bringing child into the world and you want it to be successful with the plans that you want putting into place when the time comes

Lou
xxx

 

[massacubano]

Ok so I have been reading through alot of thread lately and asking myself why do we make such a big deal out of giving birth? Personally I have always been the type of person who thinks, get on with it and that's that!

I was wondering if you share opinions on why so many women spend so much time researching, reading, deliberating stressing and fussing over something which last for most women just a day and at the end of it all you get the most amazing thing ever, your baby!

I am not saying wether you should or shouldn't fuss and do all you want to but I am just wondering if anyone knows why the birth of your baby makes women spend so much time focusing on that little part of being a mum.

So are you a kind of woman who says, "I'll just get on with it" or the kind who spends weeks researching options and trying different things?

I guess the "fuss" is being prepared. Yes, some of it is stressful choices. But, for the most part it is far better to be educated when you go in.

 

[Tilly]

I did a lot of reading about the different pain relief options, watch a lot of pregnancy/birth programs and im glad that I did. Im a "get on with things" type of person, but why not research something thats completely alien to you until that day???
So much can go right, but things can also go wrong so I felt it was important to be prepared for anything. I disagree with you completely.

 

[Shifter]

I think most of us do so much research because it is a fascinating and brand new experience (the first time)! Why would you not want to find out what it might be like and how to get the most out of the experience as possible?!