WTT dilemma- Graduate School, 30's, & fertility issues

[artchick49]

Hello- I have been teetering on the brink of existence with the m/c board and have finally decided to make the leap here.

I have a dilemma. Need a bit of advice from others who can understand where I'm coming from.

After almost 7 years of TTC I had a missed m/c at 12 weeks and m/c on 8 Sept. We were devastated but hopeful for the future. I'm now WTT because my DH is deployed in Iraq and will return early Aug.

It has been hard enough not being able to TTC after the miscarriage and WTT is giving me more and more time to reflect on the loss of my baby.

I just began my 1st year of a 2.5-3 yr graduate school program. It is an intense program as I am working towards a double MA. Ever since my m/c I have questioned how long to WTT. We were going to continue to TTC when he returned from Iraq. But with the work load I have from school I am even unable to have a job.

My biological clock was not ticking until now. We began TTC early on because of my PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) fertility issues. We looked at as though, if it happened, wonderful. If not, we would keep trying. I am turning 30 in a few months.

I question my ability to successfully carry a pregnancy due to the m/c and know if I m/c again it will greatly impact my education. I am considering holding off on TTC until I'm in the middle of my internship, which would be Jan. 2012. I would be 32 but still have the known issue of PCOS. It took us almost 7 yrs to conceive and I am afraid of waiting too long and not being able to get pg. This all mixed with my age is causing us a big amount of stress. We want it all. A great marriage, careers, and a family. I believe it is possible but we are not quite sure what our next step should be to get us there.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation or any insight? Help, please.

 

[lozzy21]

I have no advice but dident want to read and run, Good luck in what ever you decided.

 

[mummy3]

Personally I think I would keep trying. If there is a problem with recurrent m/c, if you get pregnant again and lose it you would be eligible for tests as would be your third and if not you would get a beautiful baby. I have done grad school with a pregnancy and a young child and its manageable just hectic! I for one just would not be able to put it onhold and would imagine it would be hard to stop after so long trying? better to have no regrets!

 

[goddess25]

Sorry for your loss.

I can understand how you feel. Its always a dimemma and there really is no right time to conceive and have a child. I am 35 and just had my first baby this year and going to try for #2 early next year so in regards to your age you have plenty of time left. I also have PCOS and when I was diagnosed at 19 I was told I would have difficulty conceiving, however I was lucky that did not seem to be the case for me.

I had a m/c in 2007 and it is something that is always going to be on your mind... I had a threatened m/c with this child but I thank God that everything turned out fine. Priot to TTC I joined fertility friend and spent 6 months charting menstruation, temps, cervical mucous etc just to understand my body better due to the PCOS as my cycle is a bit off. I wanted to try and get an understanding of when i was ovulating and when it was time to try i got pg first time so it was great.

Good Luck with everything, its a hard decision to make, being at grad school is imp and having a baby is hard work esp if your OH is in the forces. DO you have other family/ friend support who can help you if you have a child and continue your studies? If having a child now is what you really want then everything will work out.

 

[parkgirl]

I'm sorry for your loss. I am in a similar situation with age and fertility issues, but we haven't started trying yet. I am worried that we have waited past when we should have started trying, but all I can do is go forward at this point. You never know what will happen. I wouldn't give up on trying when your OH get's back, but I'm not you. If a baby is what you really want, you will make it work.

 

[Delamere19]

I'll be 30 next year and I am gonna be TTC next month. I can feel my body clock for sure, I know I have a while but I want to be a mum asap.

Good luck xx

 

[somedaymama]

I'm in a sort of but not really similar position...does that make sense?

We are TTC, and have been for 1 year this month. I'm in my early 20's, but my cycles have been extremely messed up since coming off of BC. This is my last cycle of TTC because after this month, if I get pregnant I will be due in the midst of my first semester of grad school. I'll either being going for an MBA or a master's in economics. I won't be able to just take a semester off or whatever to have the baby because I'll be going to school on an assistanship--working at the school to get my degree paid for.

Anyway, I don't really have any advice, but good luck figuring this all out.